


Inside Out

by Clez



Category: The Orville (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Horror, Mystery, Suspense, Thriller
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2019-11-13 09:47:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 77,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18029363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clez/pseuds/Clez
Summary: The crew of The Orville are about to find out firsthand what's really lurking in the infinite shadows.





	1. Signals

**Author's Note:**

> _"Captain! Do you ever sit in your quarters and look out the window? Do you ever stop and watch the darkness out there? It's very, very dark in space. Looks so empty. But there are terrors lurking all around us in the infinite shadows. You can't see them but they're there." -- Dr. Claire Finn 1x10 Firestorm_
> 
> This quote will actually be a driving force throughout this fic, and was a big inspiration, along with a couple of other sources that (I hope) will become clear as time goes on. There's a hint in this first chapter for keen-eyed readers, so let me know if you spot it!

There was a loud crash of voices from somewhere in the middle of the room that turned his head from the wall of synthesisers, the subsequent laughter drawing his eyes to the source effortlessly. Ed smiled, unable to help himself, as he watched Gordon wave an arm in the air, raising his voice in the same instant to tell everybody to hold up, wait just a second, he had an idea. Not just an idea, either, but an _idea_. There was a big difference.

Scooping his coffee from the synthesiser -- the thing knew just how to make it for him now; had someone programmed it that way or was that just how the thing worked? -- he headed across the room, closer to the group huddled around the table. At the centre of it all sat Gordon, hunched over something now that Ed realised after craning his neck to see was some kind of pad that he was working at furiously. Dann was sitting to one side of Gordon, leaning in close and talking furiously, at a frantic pace, but he wasn’t doing it loudly enough for Ed to hear what was being said. Clustered around were various members of crew from all departments, wearing all colours and emblems, some of them clearly off-duty from the looks of their civilian clothing. Even Yaphit was there and Ed had to ask himself how exactly he hadn’t seen the Gelatin Lieutenant before: he was _on_ the table, taking advantage of his size and shape so he could get even closer to whatever was going on. He extended his body forward, forming an arm from his overall mass, and gestured at something, but before he had even finished Gordon was cutting him off: “Yeah, yeah, I got it. Don’t worry, man!”

It was Yaphit who saw Ed first, and it was as the Lieutenant reacted to his presence that he had to ask himself _how_ exactly that worked. He felt the crease form in his brow, the frown -- equal parts curiosity and confusion -- forming briefly on his face before Gordon looked up and spotted him too.

“Captain! Hey!” Around this many people it was no surprise to Ed that Gordon didn’t call him by name. They might have known one another for what felt like forever at this point, they might be best friends, but there was a point where familiarity just became a little too familiar. Apparently this was it. “How’s it going?” 

Ed smiled. “It’s going.” He nodded towards the table. “What’s going on?” 

Several of the crew gathered glanced almost nervously to one another, a few of them muttering or giggling, and that only made Ed all the more curious. None of them spoke directly to him though, not even Yaphit, someone who wasn’t exactly known for his shyness. They were leaving it to Gordon, apparently, and the pilot picked up on the cue. With a wave of his arms that told Ed he was trying to find the words he chuckled a little and said, “It’s not finished, and hey, it’s just spit balling and brainstorming, all that stuff, but—” With another vague gesture, a physical _screw it_ if Ed had ever seen one, he retrieved the pad from the surface of the table and lifted it, holding it out. It was far enough out that Ed could reach over and take it, holding his coffee in one hand now, quietly grateful that Gordon had handed it to him the right way up so he didn’t have to worry about fumbling anything trying to turn it. 

It didn’t take him long to figure out what he was looking at and he could see past the illuminated pad that Gordon was watching him expectantly, almost a little nervously now. Ed couldn’t help but crack a smile, and a genuine one at that. Ed found himself wondering which number smile it was in Kelly’s little catalogue but the thought was out of his head almost as quickly as it had entered, his gaze moving past the pad to his friend’s face. “No rainbow unicorn?” he asked. 

The nervousness was gone from Gordon’s face almost instantly and he shook his head with a laugh. “I mean, which side do you put it on? And then it’s like ‘oh, well what about both?’ But then that’s crazy because two? That’s too much, you know?” 

“Oh, yeah,” Ed said, wishing he was close enough to the table to set his coffee down so he could rotate the image on the screen in front of him, wanting to see how Gordon had decorated the _Orville_ on all sides and from every angle. Did the flames extend all the way around? Was there anything on the underside of the ship? “We wouldn’t want to go overboard.” 

“Right?” Gordon scoffed. “There’s a line.” 

“Definitely.” Ed took another look at the pad, aware that everyone was watching him, waiting, and he smiled again. 

“It’s still a work in progress,” Gordon put in quickly, holding up a hand as if to excuse any sloppiness or inconsistencies. 

“Well,” Ed said, offering the pad back, noting the way the female ensign closest to his end of the table bobbed her head down so she wouldn’t be in his way. He hadn’t noticed her height before then, or the fact that she was seated and her head still came up almost to his chest. Jeez, how tall _was_ she? “Keep me posted? I want to see that when it’s done.” 

Gordon beamed, taking the pad back eagerly, giving a decisive nod. “You got it, boss.” 

And then, just like that, they were all back at it, bending over the table again and chattering over one another to give Gordon their input. Ed watched them all for a few moments more before excusing himself, able to do so without any sort of fanfare given their distraction. Heading for the door he raised his brows at Olix to get the bartender’s attention. As soon as he knew he had it he jabbed a thumb over his shoulder, saying as he did so, “Make sure someone wipes down that table once Yaphit’s gone.” 

Olix followed Ed’s gesture and made a show of sighing before waving the cloth he was holding in the air. As Ed passed through the door of the mess hall he thought he heard the bartender laugh to himself but he couldn’t be sure, at least not without ducking back in, something he knew from experience was never _not_ awkward. So he kept on going, the sounds of enthusiastically raised voices and the odd burst of laughter following him all the way down the hall and around the bend. 

Kelly was in the command chair when he reached the bridge but before he had even crossed the threshold she was looking back over her shoulder at him and vacating the seat. “Hi,” she said, a greeting that might have sounded a little too plain for anyone who didn’t know them but Ed knew better. He saw the way she smiled, the easy way she moved, that quiet fondness in her gaze that he was constantly trying not to read into too much. 

“Hey,” he returned, smiling back, making his way around to the chair and setting his coffee down before taking his seat, getting himself comfortable easily. “What have I missed?” 

“Oh, the usual,” Kelly said to him with a hint of amusement in her voice. “Ensign Babcock was just telling us all about his cats.” 

“All seven of them!” Ensign Babcock clearly wasn’t done, chiming up from the Engineering station and looking all too keen to be included. “You want to see pictures, Captain? I have pictures.” 

Ed glanced quickly back towards Kelly who gave the tiniest shake of her head, such a small motion that no one else could have seen it. “Oh, you know, I _would_ , but—” Oh, no, why hadn’t he thought of an excuse? Already he could see Babcock shifting in his seat, ready to get up, far too eager to come on over and share those pictures. Ed felt a flash of panic. “I’m allergic.” 

Babcock hesitated, blinking. “A-allergic?” 

“Yeah.” 

“But—” Babcock looked like he wanted to laugh but there was a doubt there. He wasn’t sure if he should. “They’re just pictures.” 

“It’s a _bad_ allergy,” Ed said, shaking his head, doing his best to look grave. 

“The worst,” Kelly chimed in from his other side. Ed made a note to buy her a drink later. “He gets all puffy and breaks out, he doesn’t stop sneezing. It’s _nasty_. You don’t want to see it.” She made a show of shaking her head, screwing her face into an expression that was suitably disgusted. “Trust me.” 

And apparently Babcock did because he hadn’t left his seat. “Oh.” He glanced around. “They’re not actually on the ship, though? I mean, it’s just pictures.” 

“Best not to risk it, huh?” Ed slapped his hand lightly on the arm of his chair and quickly turned away before the ensign could carry on, tossing a look to Kelly that was equal parts alarm and gratitude. Before he could say anything else a voice from the other side of the bridge sounded, Talla turning from her station to look towards the command chairs as she spoke. Maybe he ought to buy her a drink too. 

“Captain, you have a message coming in from Admiral Halsey.” 

“Already? Is it even nine yet?” 

Talla smiled at that, laughing a little before she went on, “Not quite, sir. Do you want me to patch it through to your office?” 

“Sure. Thanks, Lieutenant.” Ed snatched his coffee from its spot on the central panel, noting how Kelly rose as well. “Bortus, you have the conn.” The Moclan uttered his usual response and made his way promptly over to the command chairs before Ed and Kelly had even left the bridge. As they made their way to Ed’s office door he turned his head to look at Kelly as he said, “Gordon’s planning a makeover for the _Orville_ , by the way.” 

“Yeah?” Kelly looked suitably intrigued and endeared by that. “Flames and go faster stripes?” 

“You bet,” Ed said, finally taking a sip of his coffee as they crossed into his office and he made his way around the desk. Kelly took up her usual spot at his back even as he called up the communication from Union Central. Did Admiral Halsey ever smile? Ed couldn’t help but wonder as the older man popped into view and took in the sight of the pair of them waiting for him. Ed thought he had seen it happen a couple of times but now he wasn’t sure. Had he imagined that? 

“Good,” Halsey said almost immediately, giving a small nod of his head. “I was hoping to catch both of you.” 

“Hey, where else would we be?” Ed realised his joke had instantly fallen flat when Halsey simply fixed him with a stare. Well. Worth a shot. 

Kelly quickly jumped in to fill the awkward silence and get the conversation moving in the right direction. “Is everything all right, Admiral?” 

“That remains to be seen, Commander,” he said to her, appearing momentarily grateful for the prompt. “Outpost 31 has been receiving some strange communications and signals over the course of the last week. No one there can make heads or tails of them and they’ve become increasingly erratic and unusual as time has gone on. There are no other Union ships in the vicinity and Outpost 31 doesn’t have the equipment or the staff necessary to investigate further.” 

Ed wanted to say something about drawing the short straw but instead he kept his mouth shut and turned his coffee mug on the table, letting Kelly ask from behind him, “What sorts of signals are we talking about here, Admiral?” 

“They’re—” Halsey went quiet, almost as if he was at a loss for words, an unusual enough state of affairs that Ed and Kelly shared a glance. How bad was it if one of the admiralty was stumped? “They’re not easy to describe in the least,” he said finally, knitting his hands together on the desk in front of him. “We’re having all the information we have sent to you but we’ve told Outpost 31 to expect you within the next twenty-four hours. The staff there can give you all the data they’ve been able to collect and analyse.” His tone was grave as he went on, “I don’t need to tell either one of you to exercise extreme caution here. Whatever these messages are no one has recognised them so far. For all we know it’s just background noise, but it could be much, _much_ more than that.” 

“It could be an attempt at first contact,” Kelly said. 

Ed gave the smallest shake of his head. “Or a warning.” 

“It could be anything,” Halsey agreed, spreading his hands for a moment before knitting them again. “Take it slow on this one, Ed. We don’t know what you’ll be flying into and we don’t want to take any unnecessary risks.” A look crossed his face, one Ed couldn’t quite discern, but from the way Kelly laid a hand on the back of his chair’s headrest he thought she might have recognised it. “But at the same time,” the admiral went on, “we need you and your crew to get to the bottom of this. The sooner the better.” 

Ed and Kelly shared another look and he saw the way her brows were furrowed, the frown telling him she was sceptical, that on some level she didn’t like how little they knew about this. That made two of them. 

“As I said we’re sending you everything we have. You should have it shortly. Keep us posted.” The admiral gave a short nod. “Halsey out.” And then he was gone. 

For a few seconds Ed sat there quietly before he leaned back in his chair. Just for a moment he felt Kelly’s fingers brush against the collar of his jacket before she withdrew her hand. “Is it me,” he said, “or does that guy _really_ need to get l—” Kelly had moved to the side a little and was looking at him, and it wasn’t an amused look either. “Lighten up. Is it me or does he need to lighten up?” 

Kelly quirked a brow, watching him for a moment, before she let it slide. “Whatever Outpost 31 has been picking up on it’s clearly got people spooked.” 

“You think?” 

“You _don’t_ think?” 

Ed thought back on what Halsey had said and inclined his head a little. “Okay, fair. But why?” 

Kelly lifted one shoulder in the beginnings of a shrug that never really fully formed. “I guess there’s only one way to find out.”


	2. Out of the Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In honour of International Women's Day the focal points of this chapter belong to a couple of the crew's leading ladies.

Everyone at the briefing room table was turned towards the screen at the head of the room, alternating between studying the information displayed there and giving their attention to one of the two officers bookending it. Isaac stood to one side with John to the other, the two seemingly taking it in turns to speak. Kelly turned her attention from one to the other accordingly, taking the opportunity to try and piece together the puzzle on the screen in the gaps between their explanations. 

“So they _are_ messages?” Talla leaned forward a little from her place to Kelly’s other side, looking to the head of the room, sounding a mixture of intrigued and cautious. Fitting really, given her position. A certain amount of curiosity about all things exploratory was good but Kelly was glad their Security Chief had a more than healthy dose of wariness when it came to the unknown. “Why can’t we understand what they’re saying?” 

“That is a good question, Lieutenant.” Isaac made one of his usual smooth motions towards Talla with one of his hands before turning a little back towards the screen, indicating the shifting data there as he went on, “Commander LaMarr and I have analysed these messages, as you call them, multiple times and have, as of yet, been unsuccessful in our attempts to extract precise details from the information.” 

“Is it corrupted in some way?” Ed had one arm propped on the table, his hand near his mouth as he scanned the screen. Kelly could see the furrow in his brow that told her he was deep in thought, trying to figure it out, much as she was. Everyone at the table was confused but keen at the same time, wanting to make this make sense. That brought her a sense of comfort in the face of so much uncertainty: the crew of the _Orville_ had proven countless times just how well they could work together, the sorts of things they could achieve if they put their heads together. For just a moment she had to suppress a smile, an effort made all that much easier when John spoke up from the front and called her attention back to the problem at hand. 

“That’s one way of putting it, yeah.” John gestured at several lines of code that were wavering and, Kelly noticed upon studying them a little more carefully, fractured. “We’re not sure if it’s been corrupted at the source or if it was made that way.” 

“What do you mean?” Bortus was never one to stay quiet when something didn’t make sense. Clearly it wasn’t in a Moclan’s nature to ignore such things. 

“There’s some inconsistencies in the source data that I can’t figure out,” John went on, calling up a bigger display of the data in question. It didn’t make nearly as much sense to most of them as it did to him, Kelly suspected, but he would dumb it down enough for them to follow along. “Like this here?” He gestured to a line that looked so cleanly broken it was almost as though someone had taken a knife to it. “I can’t wrap my head around how that’d happen naturally.” 

“So it was made broken?” Gordon glanced around the table, clearly at a loss. “What’s the point in that?” 

Ed lowered his hand to the table if only to avoid muffling his voice when he spoke. “Was there any indication the staff at Outpost 31 came to the same conclusion?” 

“No, Sir, nothing like that,” John said with a shake of his head. “We can ask them when we get there, but honestly? If they didn’t figure that out as well then they’re really not the guys for the job. No offence.” 

Kelly glanced around the room and saw no arguments, not even the very beginnings of one forming on anyone’s face. Clearly they were in agreement. “Outpost 31 isn’t really made for this sort of thing,” she offered, not because she felt the need to defend people she had never met but because it was worth highlighting that this was _their_ job out here. “Everyone has their specialities.” 

“Yeah,” Gordon agreed, shrugging a little. “Theirs is growing food or whatever and ours is kicking space butt.” 

“Not quite.” But Kelly was smiling as she said it, turning back to the front just in time to see a similar expression fade from Ed’s face as well. “Were you able to decipher _any_ of the information in the messages? Anything at all?” She was looking at Isaac and it the Kaylon who answered her. 

“Fragments of words only, Commander. There was nothing conclusive and, unfortunately, too much damage for us to piece said fragments together.” 

“Anyone like jigsaw puzzles?” Talla had leaned back in her seat. 

From the other side of the table, between Bortus and Gordon, Claire spoke up at last. “If this information has been intentionally corrupted, as you say, what does that mean for us?” She glanced across at Ed and Kelly. “It’s entirely possible that whoever sent these messages needs our help, yes, but—” She let her words drop off there, waiting for the two commanding officers to pick up on her thread. 

Ed spoke first. “If they’re intentionally corrupted then there’s a chance this is some kind of lure.” 

“To what end, Captain?” Bortus’ voice had taken on that guarded quality that Kelly thought she was pretty familiar with by now. After their time spent together on Regor II she thought she was a fairly good judge of him in general nowadays. It was hard to spend that sort of time with anyone and not get to know them. It had certainly worked in her and Ed’s favour, giving them a deep and unwavering understanding of one another, not always for the benefit of all those around them but never to the detriment of their work on the _Orville_. That was what they aimed for anyway. 

Ed had turned back to the table and those seated around it more now, meeting Bortus’ gaze first of all but looking at them all in turn, if only for a moment. “We won’t know that until we get more information. Admiral Halsey told us to keep our guard up, and I think by this point we know better than to go waltzing in _anywhere_ without a healthy dose of scepticism.” Kelly watched Ed glance in Isaac’s direction. She had known what he meant by the remark, they all had, and none of them needed the reminder of their close call with the Kaylon, but clearly Ed believed it was worth reminding them all anyway. 

Isaac tilted his head, angling it enough to make it clear that he was looking around the table. Perhaps wisely he remained quiet. For a few seconds so did everyone else. 

“Whatever happens,” Ed went on, “we play this smart. We get to Outpost 31, we examine all the data, and then we make our plans. And we _stick_ to them.” 

Kelly kept her face neutral. Making plans and sticking to them was easier said than done, and a fine idea in theory, but in space? They both knew better. But she wasn’t about to challenge Ed directly in front of everyone, especially not after all that they had been through together. As his First Officer it was her job to question his judgement but not in front of his senior staff. She wasn’t here to undermine him or his authority. 

“Isaac, John, keep at it. We’ve got a little time before we reach Outpost 31. See if there’s anything more you can dig up from what we have.” The two officers acknowledged and Ed turned to the rest of the table. “Dismissed.” 

Kelly remained where she was as the rest of the senior staff excused themselves, briskly heading off to their respective stations. In next to no time at all it was just the two of them and Kelly suspected Ed had wanted that to be the case, that he had hoped she would remain as well. Without a word he rose from his seat and walked to the screen: Isaac and John had left the data displayed there, perhaps suspecting that the two commanding officers would want to examine it a little more closely. Kelly had a hard time believing either one of them would have done it by accident. 

Rising from her seat Kelly moved to the front of the room as well to join him, loosely linking her hands at the small of her back as she stood beside him, watching the information flow. She watched and she waited and she studied, taking in as much as she could in the time it took the man beside her to speak again. 

He only kept her waiting for a minute. “I don’t want to lose any more people, Kel.” 

For a second it felt like her heart was at risk of dropping into the pit of her stomach. It took every ounce of strength she had to keep her hands where they were, to keep herself from reaching out and laying one on Ed’s arm, or his back, his shoulder, any part of him she could reach so that she could give him some small semblance of comfort or reassurance. “We won’t let that happen.” When she turned her head it caused him to do the same, bringing his eyes to hers so she could reassure him that way instead. “We’ve got this,” she told him, wanting him to believe it as much as she did, part of her _needing_ him to share her conviction. 

It hadn’t been so very long ago that she had told him she believed in him, that _that_ was why she had pushed for him to get the _Orville_. It wasn’t because she had felt sorry for him, it hadn’t even really been because she wanted to make up for the pain she had caused him during the collapse of their marriage. Kelly had pushed the way she had because Ed Mercer really was a great officer, one of the best the Planetary Union had to offer, and she had genuinely believed, with all her heart and soul, that all of those qualities that made him such a great officer would carry over to command. Kelly had known for years that Ed was destined to be a captain, she had known that he had wanted it obviously but she had figured out on her own early on in to their relationship that he was a good fit for it. 

But when he stumbled? God, it hurt to see him like that. She could see it in his eyes now, the fear of failure, that dread that he would put a foot wrong and people would get hurt. Because Ed wasn’t worried about hurting himself, he had never been afraid of that and she knew that he would gladly take any and all pain himself if it spared someone else, but seeing others suffer for any mistake he perceived to be his own? It killed him. Every time it happened it killed him that little bit more. Kelly was deathly afraid of Ed losing more of himself than he could recover and had vowed early on into her commission aboard the _Orville_ that she would do everything in her power to keep that from happening. 

Kelly would protect Ed the same way she knew he would protect her, with her life if she had to. Not because she had to, not because she was his First Officer and it was expected of her to have his back, but because it was the only thing that felt right. Because it just made _sense_ to her. Because she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if she didn’t. 

“We’ve got this,” she told him again, taking one of her hands from her back then and laying it to his instead, high up, close to his shoulder, holding his gaze all the while so he would see her conviction and her belief and hopefully take just a fraction of it into himself. 

Ed drew in a breath, holding it in his chest for a few seconds as he stood there looking back at her. When he spoke Kelly heard the steadiness there and couldn’t help but smile, relieved and satisfied: “We’ve got this.” 

  

* * *

 

Talla was the third one off the shuttle after Captain Mercer and Commander Grayson, quickly taking stock of her surroundings as was expected of her in her position as Chief of Security, noting all of the possible exits and, respectively, attack routes that a hostile force might use if they found themselves under siege. She did a swift -- and admittedly rough -- count of the personnel present, taking in as many details as possible. The more information she had to work with the better she could do her job, at least in her experience. 

The decision had been made to bring a shuttle to the Outpost rather than docking the _Orville_ herself as a whole and not one of the crew had voiced any sort of complaint, least of all Talla. The last time the ship had been taken in to dock in an unfamiliar location it had been seized and hijacked. None of them were in a hurry to relive such an event, she was sure, and as she followed in the wake of the Captain and the Commander she found herself glad that they were taking more precautions this time around. It made her job a little easier if nothing else. 

“Captain Mercer?” a voice called from just ahead and a man stepped forward to offer the Captain his hand. It was taken and the two shook as the man went on, “My name is Doctor Fleming, I’m in charge here at Outpost 31. I oversee the projects that we run here.” 

Talla was listening but only in so much as she needed to, doing another sweep of the area where they had paused, taking in the clean and efficient design of the place, the minimalist approach they had taken with the white walls that almost reminded her of a hospital in their sterile appearance. If she worked in a place like this she had a feeling she would go out of her mind, it was all so plain and indistinct. Did people lose their bearings here a lot? There was nothing defining about any one area over any other that she could see, every doorway and hallway entrance looked the same and as she glanced up over their heads she saw several identical balconies overlooking their location. She made a note to keep them clear of this area if they had to make a break for it. Far too many vantage points for attackers from above. 

“If you’ll follow me, we have all the information we were asked to collect for you and your people.” Doctor Fleming was a nondescript man himself, Talla noticed, with dark and unremarkable hair, an equally unremarkable face that you would struggle to pick out of a crowd, and if she had to guess she would have put his age somewhere in the late forties or early fifties. Talla suspected he might have been older than all of the _Orville_ crew present but without asking there was no way of knowing and she knew enough about human culture to understand it wasn’t the done thing with women. Or maybe that rule only applied to human males. Maybe she would ask John or Gordon later. 

The crew followed Fleming down one of the bland hallways to a doorway that had a designation stamped into a plate outside of its door and Talla noted the digits as they went in -- RL-29-3B -- before taking a look around. It was a conference room of some sort, she thought, or at least a meeting space for the researchers who called the Outpost their home and place of work. There were panels for information projected into the space directly above the table’s surface running its whole length from one end to the other and as she rounded the corner of it and came around to its other side she noticed the information was projected identically on both sides so that a group of people could all view the same facts and figures without clamouring to get a decent view. Clever. 

“This is all the information we’ve received since the transmissions started coming in,” Fleming told them, standing on the other side of the table, knotting his hands together and then separating them again, only a few seconds passing before he repeated the process. Either he was nervous or he was used to having something to do with his hands and the absence of some sort of task was bothering him, even if it was only subconsciously. Talla suspected it was a combination of both. 

“And when did the transmissions first start coming through?” It was Commander Grayson who asked, her eyes only briefly leaving the information presented for them. 

“Around four or five days ago?” Fleming voiced it like a question and when they all just looked back at him he cleared his throat a little awkwardly. “Four days, I believe. I can confirm that for you?” 

Talla couldn’t be sure but she thought he couldn’t wait to get out of the room. 

“That would be useful, Doctor. Thank you.” Isaac had opted to speak up then, actually causing Fleming to jerk a little in place as if the sound of the Kaylon’s voice was startling to him. Talla glanced to her side to find Captain Mercer looking down at her, obviously coming to the same conclusion: the man was on edge. 

“All right. Okay. Well—” Fleming fidgeted on the spot for a few moments and then reached behind him to pop the door open again, accidentally knocking a couple of other buttons before he successfully struck the right one. With an awkward nod at the group he took his leave and they waited until the door closed behind him before saying anything. 

“He couldn’t get out of here fast enough,” Commander Grayson said, frowning, looking around before she moved to the other side of the table, opposite the Captain who remained in place beside Talla. John and Isaac approached the table as well, the former staying on their side of the table while the latter moved around to analyse the data beside the Commander. “It’s like I said,” the Commander went on, bringing the Captain’s gaze up with her words. When their eyes met over the projected screens she said, as if by way of conclusion, “Spooked.” 

The Captain let out a breath, saying as he did so, “Let’s see if we can figure out why, shall we?” 

What followed was a good ten minutes of back and forth between Isaac and John that Talla couldn’t really join in on but much like the Captain and the Commander she studied what she could see and drew what conclusions she could. For a while all their two specialists -- for want of a better term -- seemed to do was re-examine the information they had been given, using the raw data to go further in depth than they had been able to with the relayed data provided to them by Union Central. They exchanged what sounded to Talla like half-formed ideas and suggestions, a kind of verbal shorthand that she supposed made all the sense in the world to those in their line of work. It made her wonder what the day-to-day life had to be like in Engineering and just how much it would make her head spin. 

“Huh.” It wasn’t much of a noise at all but Talla looked down the table at John, as did everyone else, even as he tapped several keys and enlarged a file that did not look familiar to any of them. Captain Mercer moved closer and Talla found herself doing the same. Isaac and Commander Grayson were obviously looking at the same data on the other side of the table. “This is new,” John said, looking to his side at the Captain. “We didn’t get this in the data dump from Union Central.” 

“Why wouldn’t they include it in the packet they sent us?” Talla looked across at Commander Grayson who was wearing a questioning look that she imagined was very similar -- if not identical -- to the one on her own face. 

“From the looks of the timestamp on the file,” Isaac said, tapping a few keys, “it would appear that this transmission came into the Outpost’s possession after you received the message from Admiral Halsey. This information was not included in the packet we received because it did not exist at the time of the transfer.” 

A simple enough explanation, Talla thought, but even she could see there was something about this file that made it stand out from the others. “Is this a bigger file than the others?” she asked, indicating the spikes on the screen in front of them. 

“Yeah.” John glanced to her. “ _Much_ bigger.” He looked to Captain Mercer. “Sir, I’m pretty sure this file isn’t corrupted.” After a beat he added, “At least not as much as the others.” 

“You mean this one might have a message?” Their two commanding officers exchanged a look over the screen. “Well,” the Captain said, sounding like he was bracing himself, “let’s hear it, Chief.” 

John only had to tap a couple of keys to get the message loaded and playing and they fell silent, listening. At first it was just white noise, dead air almost, not unlike what Talla had heard in the mess hall when one of Olix’s records finished, or right before it was about to start playing. It was followed by crackling and clicking, a series of whines and a snapping sound. Talla narrowed her eyes, tilting her head to listen, as if that would help. 

The sound of the gasp was so sudden, so loud in comparison to the distortion preceding it, that she couldn’t help the way her body tensed, every muscle in her frame tightening as if in preparation of an attack. To her side Captain Mercer jerked back involuntarily, caught off guard, and a quick glance showed everyone else had had the same reaction with the exception of Isaac. No surprise there. 

None of them spoke, listening to what sounded like erratic breathing, a series of sounds that Talla suspected might have been frantic scrabbling over a rough surface, and then a voice sounded, rasping and yet still distinct: _“Help me_.” 

The message ended. Just like that. Silence fell and for several seconds no one spoke or moved. It was almost like they were all holding their breath, waiting for something else surprising to happen. They exchanged glances, each of them looking from one face to the next in turn. 

Captain Mercer was the first to speak, looking to John as he did. “Can you trace the message?” 

John and Isaac actually went to work at the same time, keying in commands for several seconds before the Chief Engineer could give a response. “There _are_ coordinates in here, Sir, but they’re buried under the distortion. It’ll take us a little while to dig ‘em out.” 

“How long?” The Captain was tapping the fingers of one hand on the surface of the table, lightly but with a quiet sense of urgency that had Talla suspecting she knew what was coming. 

After another look at the data John said, “Not long, Sir. Maybe twenty minutes? It’s just a lot of background noise we gotta dig through and set aside to get to what’s underneath. It shouldn’t take too long.” Even so he waited, touching nothing else before an official order was given. 

The Captain didn’t keep him waiting long. “Go to it.” He looked across at Commander Grayson then, glancing back at Talla to include her in his thought process. “Whoever’s out there, whatever’s happened, we’re not going to be able to figure it out from looking at all of this.” He made a vague gesture at the screens. “And we can’t help them from here.” The confidence in his voice had grown now. He might not have made the decision fully yet but he was well on his way, clearly. “Admiral Halsey said it himself: Outpost 31 doesn’t have the staff or the equipment necessary to do what we _can_. We have an obligation to at least investigate this further and gather all the facts.” 

“And that means going out there,” Commander Grayson concluded, pausing for only a moment before giving a small nod, clearly agreeing with him. 

They both glanced in Talla’s direction then, bringing her into the conversation directly. “Whoever they are,” she said, “they obviously need help.” She looked from the Captain to the Commander. “We have to try, right?” Because if they didn’t, if they didn’t at least _try_ and they found out later that someone out there had died alone and helpless and in God only knew what condition, Talla for one would never be able to forgive herself. This was their job, their duty, one of the reasons they had all joined the Union in the first place. They had to try. 

The Captain drew in a breath and nodded his head, decision made. “All right.” Glancing in John and Isaac’s direction he said, “Get all of this sent to the _Orville_ as quickly as you can. You can compare it to what we have and fill in any gaps as we go.” He turned back to Commander Grayson and Talla then. “Let’s find Doctor Fleming and see if he has anything else for us before we get out of here.” 

He didn’t, as it happened, unless they counted the obvious relief the man showed in being taken out of the equation. He was quick to shake Captain Mercer’s hand and thank him for looking into the matter and as they parted ways Talla saw the way Fleming’s shoulders dropped, the tension flooding out of him as they made their way back to their shuttle. It was a good thing the man hadn’t been anywhere near what had happened with the Kaylon, she thought. He would have dropped dead of fear at the first sight of those cranial cannons of theirs. 

She found herself glancing at Isaac as they departed, specifically the twin points of brilliant blue light on his faceplate. None of them had ever even suspected that they were the barrels of weapons, or that Isaac himself actually _was_ a weapon. None of them had needed the reminder that there was still a lot about space and its countless inhabitants that they didn’t know but every time she looked at the Kaylon now that was exactly what went through her mind.

Considering what they had just heard that probably wasn’t a bad thing. Maybe it was actually for the best.


	3. In the Shadows

“ _Discovery_.” Gordon said the name aloud from the helm, not even bothering to turn in his seat to indicate to the rest of the bridge crew that he was initiating a conversation. “I mean, it’s a little on the nose, isn’t it?” He did look back then, glancing first at Ed and Kelly and then sweeping his gaze over the rest of the bridge. 

“On the contrary,” Isaac interjected from his station, “it is a very fitting name for such a vessel given the nature of—” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Gordon waved a hand in the air. “They’re out here to find new things or whatever, but I mean c’mon. Why not just call your ship _We Find Stuff_.” 

“That would be a terrible name for a ship.” Bortus was looking right at Gordon. From her seat Kelly showed a smile but stayed quiet, letting the conversation happen around them. 

“Yeah, I know.” Gordon was getting increasingly invested in the topic, Ed could tell, becoming more animated with every additional remark, fidgeting in his seat in that tell-tale restless way of his. “But that’s basically what they did.” He looked right at Ed then. “Back me up on this, Captain.” 

For a few seconds Ed stayed quiet, glancing around the bridge, and then he gave Gordon a small shrug. “It could be worse.” 

With a huff of air between his lips that was obviously meant to sound displeasure Gordon spun his seat back to his station, tapping several commands before he said, “It’s a dumb name.” 

“Dumb name or not,” Kelly said from her seat, “it sounds like they need our help.” 

That was the end of it, Gordon opting to remain quiet after that sobering little reminder. Ed tossed Kelly a grateful glance before he looked down at the pad in his hand. The information John and Isaac had compiled from not only Union Central but Outpost 31 was partially displayed on the screen and he had been going over it repeatedly during their journey, only half-listening to the usual chatter of those around him. He kept coming back to the audio file they had uncovered at Outpost 31 and though he couldn’t listen to it here it was replaying in his head, over and over again. It was lodged in there, stuck fast, with no signs of letting go any time soon. Ed was pretty sure he was going to be hearing those two words in his sleep for weeks to come. 

If that wasn’t a chilling thought he didn’t know what was. 

“Captain, we’re coming up on the coordinates now.” 

Ed looked ahead at Gordon and then turned to Bortus when the Moclan spoke up to his left. “Scans confirm the presence of a ship.” 

“Talla, can you hail them?” 

At her station the Xelayan worked quickly, turning to the command chairs with a shake of her head. “No answer, Captain.” 

Kelly was frowning. “Isaac?” 

“My scans indicate that there is limited power aboard the vessel, however there is no evidence of any external damage.” 

“So they’re just—” Gordon gestured to the viewer where a magnified view of the ship had been displayed. “Dead in the water for no reason?” 

“Some kind of overload maybe?” Talla suggested. “Something going on with the ship’s engines?” 

“I am not detecting any such malfunctions,” Isaac reported, “but it is possible that there has been some sort of ship wide failure that our scans cannot identify.” 

Ed stifled a sigh. “Well that’s reassuring.” He glanced to Kelly to find her already looking at him. He could see in her eyes the same uncertainty he felt, scepticism and doubt tangled up with no small amount of curiosity. Those words were still playing on a loop in his head, the sound of that voice so ragged and frantic echoing through his skull. “Talla, Isaac, you’re with me.” Kelly’s eyes followed him as he rose from his seat and he saw the question there, the barely contained desire to challenge his decision. “I’ll meet you in the shuttle bay in five minutes,” he told the officers who had also risen from their stations and both of them acknowledged before taking their leave. Kelly only needed the smallest motion of his head to follow him from the bridge and to his office. 

No sooner had the door closed than she was speaking up, saying, “Ed, I should be the one to go over there.” 

“I made the call to bring us out here, Kel,” he told her, “and I’m going to see this through myself.” She didn’t look appeased in the slightest. Ed did his best to give her a smile, small and short-lived though it was. “Besides, I need someone back here who can bail us out if it goes south.” 

Kelly didn’t even begin to smile. 

“We’ll be fine.” 

“At least take a security detail with you.” 

“I’ve got Talla.” 

She did smile then, if only for a moment. “ _Additional_ security, then.” 

Ed thought about arguing, telling her they didn’t need it, but all he had to do was look into her eyes and see the concern there, the worry that something terrible would happen and there would be nothing she could do. It didn’t take much for him to imagine how he would feel in her position. It would be hell to be stuck on that bridge, powerless to do anything, knowing that people he cared about were in danger and he hadn’t done enough to keep them safe. When he spoke again his voice was quiet, softer and gentler. “All right.” 

She let out a breath, dipping her head in a small nod. “Okay.” She tried to smile at him. Ed wondered if his own attempt had been any more convincing than hers. Something told him it hadn’t. “Be careful over there, Ed.” Those were words that never needed to be said between them but they still said them every time, without fail. They didn’t really do anything, those words, they didn’t have any great power, but right now they were for Kelly herself as much as for him. It was the same whenever he said it to her. 

“I will.” For a few seconds they just stood like that, Kelly holding his gaze and Ed holding hers in return, and then without another word she turned and left. Ed wasn’t far behind her, watching her walk back to the bridge and claim the command chair that Bortus had been occupying during her absence. He didn’t let himself linger long before he got underway, making the call as he descended the steps to summon three of Talla’s staff to the shuttle bay to accompany the team on the mission. 

 

* * *

 

Talla was at the front of the party when the airlock released and granted them entry to the ship. Beyond the open doorway lay an unfamiliar bay shrouded in shadow, the only shapes distinguishable those of crates that had once been stacked, presumably neatly, but were now cast across the floor in disarray. The Chief of Security took a cautious step through the opening, flicking on a flashlight, prompting the rest of the party to the do the same. 

Ed was near the back, the security detail preceding him. Isaac brought up the very rear, following the rest of them off the shuttle. As they stood taking stock of their surroundings Ed considered whether or not to leave someone with the shuttle but instead he turned to Isaac. “Are you sure you couldn’t detect any life signs?” he asked the Kaylon who was studying the comscanner in his grasp. 

“I am quite certain, Captain.” 

He sighed, looking around at the team. If there were no life signs on board now that meant there was no risk to leaving the shuttle unguarded. It also meant they were too late to help whoever it was they had heard in that message. Despite himself he had been holding out hope that Isaac’s scans had been wrong somehow, that there would be someone left to save, but now that they were on the ship and there was still nothing? It was more than a little disheartening. “All right,” he said, addressing the whole team. “Spread out and take a good look around. Let’s see if we can’t figure out what happened here.” Maybe they could at least get some answers and keep whatever had happened here from happening to anyone else. 

As they started to spread through the ship Ed couldn’t deny the fact that the presence of the PM-44 at his side was a comfort. The _Discovery_ was shrouded in shadow everywhere they turned and he felt a general sense of unease come over him as he walked down the corridor he had taken once they had left the bay where they had docked the shuttle. One of Talla’s team was following about ten feet behind him, keeping a respectful distance while at the same time keeping an eye on him, he was sure. Once leaving the bay they had found three distinct directions to branch off in. Six members of their party and three hallways. Isaac would have pointed out that it just made good sense, mathematically, and besides, the more eyes they had investigating each part of the ship the lower the likelihood that they would miss something important. 

Ed kept his eyes up as much as possible, even with the comscanner raised to take readings of the ship as they moved through it, wanting to get a good look at his surroundings and watch out for any potential hazards as they went. Ideally he would have had his weapon drawn as well but he needed the flashlight, the ship’s power was so low that it would have been near impossible to see without it. He glanced back at the officer behind him, an Ensign whose name he thought was Marcombe, and took comfort from the sight of the weapon in the younger man’s hands. If Isaac’s scans _were_ wrong somehow and there was someone aboard this ship who meant them harm then Marcombe would be able to take care of it. Ed would just have to make sure to get out of the way, and quickly. 

They advanced through the ship, checking panels and stations as they went, sticking their heads into what looked like laboratories and more storage areas. The _Discovery_ had been a research vessel, intended to study all sorts of things from planetary soil samples to spatial anomalies, and Ed was sure there were people aboard the _Orville_ who would like to get their hands on some of the data the ship was holding. 

First things first, they had to make sure it was safe over here. If they gave it the all clear maybe he could send over another team to collect anything of value. 

Those thoughts went out of his head when they stepped through the doorway at the end of the hallway leading into what had once been the ship’s mess hall. Ed felt the bottom of his stomach threaten to drop out, a chill racing up the length of his spine, that building sense of dread he had been feeling going into overdrive now. “My God.” The words were out before he could help himself, the beam of his flashlight sweeping slowly across the floor of the room and the bodies spilled and scattered across it. 

With arms and legs splayed limply all around them the bodies were everywhere, some of them slumped over tables, many of which had been overturned. There was spoiling food cast across the ground as well but Ed had a hard time seeing it past the blood that had pooled and spattered over practically every surface in sight. 

Ensign Marcombe was standing closer to him now, weapon held at the ready, wide eyes scanning the room. “What the hell happened here, Captain?” There was a perfectly understandable note of fear in the young man’s voice. Ed wasn’t going to judge him for it. 

“I have no idea.” Ed looked down and to his right, seeing for the first time the pale and lifeless hand only a few inches from his foot. Despite the disquiet he felt he stayed where he was, tracking the beam of his flashlight up the arm and to the rest of the body. The face was turned upwards but half of it was gone. Just _gone_. Closing his eyes Ed turned his face away, drawing in a deep breath that was laced thickly with the coppery tang of blood. Holding the breath in managed to quell his stomach after the first roll and he took another, and then another. After the third he opened his eyes and dared to step forward. 

There was something on the wall dead ahead. 

Ed picked his way carefully through the bodies until he got close enough to the wall to cast the words there into harsh illumination, the message hastily smeared onto the bulkhead in what he knew instinctively to be blood. 

 _WE ARE NOT WHO W_  

The words cut off with a downward scrawl, the messy bloody smear dragging all the way down close to the floor. Ed traced it with his flashlight and saw a woman with hands stained fully red crumpled a short distance from the wall and the ominous incomplete message she had been trying to write across it. 

Marcombe was scanning the room, weapon raised, as Ed lifted his comscanner and opened a channel to the rest of his team. “This is Captain Mercer. We’ve found the crew.” There was a bad taste in his mouth by that point and it wouldn’t go away no matter how many times he tried to swallow it down. “They’re all dead.” 

 

* * *

 

Talla felt her blood run cold as Captain Mercer’s voice relayed that message through their comscanners. She exchanged a glance with Lieutenant Rendell, seeing the other woman’s jaw clench in the same way her own just had. They had come here knowing that they might find bodies but that didn’t make such a grim discovery any easier to swallow. There had been something about the Captain’s voice that told Talla all she needed to know about the condition of those bodies, that their causes of death probably hadn’t been clean and simple. He had sounded disturbed, his voice tight, it had had a restrained quality about it that told her he hadn’t liked what he’d seen. 

“Come on,” she said to Rendell. “Let’s finish checking this section and then rendezvous with Marcombe and the Captain.” They were at the front of the ship and the two of them had taken the passage to the port. 

“There’s a room over to your left,” Rendell told her, giving a nod of her head, and Talla followed the gesture to the opening in question. The door was partially closed and she looked back at the Lieutenant, stashing her comscanner so that she could draw her weapon. She might have been the strongest person on the ship but that didn’t mean she was going to take stupid risks. She gestured for Rendell to keep watch as she approached the door and gave it enough of a nudge that it slid further back into its frame and out of her way. 

The beam of her flashlight passed over the sole of a boot and she froze in place, passing the light up the body to the face. It was pale, streaked with blood, and the man’s eyes were closed, his hair plastered to his face, either by sweat or blood or a combination of both. He had slumped awkwardly against the wall, though on closer inspection Talla realised it was entirely possible he had been thrown, and _hard_. There was a dent in the wall above where his body had dropped. 

She could hear Rendell moving nearby and a glance over her shoulder showed the other woman still well within range. Talla crossed the threshold and approached the body, knowing already that she wouldn’t find any signs of life but wanting to be sure. It meant holstering her weapon but even if by some miracle the man _wasn’t_ dead he was in no condition to pose any serious threat to her. Even Rendell would have had an easy time with the guy after the beating he had taken. Still, she approached him cautiously and allowed the toe of her boot to brush his leg, watching him closely to see if he would react at all. Nothing happened. 

Talla crouched and reached towards his neck, touching her fingers to his pulse point and waiting. She studied the man’s face all the while, taking in the pale quality of the skin and the dark bruises and streaks of blood that stood out in harsh contrast. She gave a shake of her head, drawing her hand back from his neck, mumbling to herself, “What the hell happened to you?” 

“Lieutenant Keyali?” Talla turned to look back over her shoulder. Rendell’s voice was close by but she hadn’t approached the doorway. She was still watching the hallway beyond. 

“It’s another body,” she called out and then turned back to the man with a sigh. That sigh instantly became a gasp and she started so sharply that she almost fell flat on her back from the force of it. 

The man’s eyes were open now and he was looking right at her.


	4. Questions

Rendell’s call for help was still ringing in Ed’s ears as he bolted around the corner, all caution thrown to the wind in the face of the thought that one or more of his crew might be in danger. The loss of so many of his people at the hands of the Kaylon was still very much a raw wound, one that might never heal, and he would be damned if he wouldn’t do everything in his power to keep from losing any more. Marcombe was doing his best to keep up, Ed could hear the younger man sprinting behind him, but he was a few seconds late in arriving at Talla and Rendell’s location. 

Isaac and Ensign Bedria arrived shortly after but Ed didn’t so much as look in their direction as he approached the open doorway that Rendell was guarding. Just through the opening Ed could see the red of Talla’s uniform and, beyond her, what looked like a slumped figure. The Xelayan turned her head to look at him as he reached the threshold, passing Rendell and stepping inside the room, glancing from his Chief of Security to the body she had discovered. 

Why was this one separate from the others? What was he doing here? 

“Are you all right?” He turned his head to look at Talla again, giving her a once over from where he was standing. 

She nodded. “I’m fine, Captain. He just caught me off guard.” 

Ed crouched by the body slumped on the floor, tilting his head a little to get a look at the man’s face. It was bruised and bloody, and filthy beyond that. “You said he was alive?” Because he sure as hell didn’t look it now. 

“He was, Sir,” Talla said with a sigh, crouching down close by his side. “I felt for a pulse and I swear I couldn’t feel anything, but then his eyes were open and he was looking _right_ at me.” She sounded as though she couldn’t quite believe it and looking at the body of the man Ed could understand why. Dropped down on the floor like this, like a marionette that had had its strings cut, it was hard to imagine he had been alive recently, even if only briefly. 

“I’m sorry, Sir,” Rendell chimed in from the doorway. “I overreacted.” 

Ed shook his head, looking the man over one more time before he rose to his feet again, Talla following suit soon after. “Better safe than sorry, Lieutenant. You did the right thing.” Rendell looked briefly as though she wanted to argue but kept her mouth shut with the faintest bob of her head as acknowledgement. 

“Isaac,” Ed called out and waited until the Kaylon stepped fully into view before continuing. “Did you guys find anything?” 

“Nothing of any real significance, Captain. We have identified what appears to be this vessel’s primary laboratory. I have not had time to analyse the data yet but it is possible the crew’s notes could prove useful to the Union in some fashion.” 

“All right.” Ed looked down at the body again, frowning for a moment, still trying to figure out why one body was separated from the others and in what looked like such a random location. “Let’s get a team over here to recover what we can.” 

“And the body, Sir?” Talla was still close by his side, watching him intently. He could feel the weight of her gaze on him as he stood there. 

“That too.” He turned to regard the rest of the team. “Doctor Finn might be able to get us some answers.” God knew they needed some of those right now. 

 

* * *

 

Gordon was getting really sick of looking at dead bodies. After the first few seconds of the images displayed on the screen in the briefing room he had opted to avert his gaze in as subtle a way as he could manage. After what they had found on Kaylon he’d seen enough bodies to last a lifetime and if he stopped seeing them in his dreams any time in the next five years it would be nothing short of a miracle. When he lifted his gaze he found Ed looking at him and was grateful for that, grateful that no one else had seen him avoiding the grim reality of what they had found on the _Discovery_. 

“So the guy Talla found, was he the one who sent the message?” John looked down the table to the Xelayan who just looked right back at him. 

“There’s no way to know that for sure,” Ed said. “You said so yourself, you and Isaac couldn’t even confirm the gender of the voice.” 

John conceded that point by reclining a little in his chair, looking thoughtful. 

“How many people were on that ship?” Gordon hadn’t even planned to speak, actually startling himself a little with the sound of his own voice. Unconsciously he had been drawing nonsensical patterns on the surface of the briefing room’s table but he made himself stop as soon as he realised. 

Isaac’s response was matter-of-fact. No real surprise there. “One hundred and forty nine.” The Kaylon went on to add, “The individual discovered by Lieutenant Keyali was the only one not located in the ship’s mess hall.” 

“And that’s what I don’t get.” Ed leaned forward on the table, knitting his hands in front of him. “What was this _one guy_ doing cut off from the rest of the crew like that?” He fixed his gaze on Isaac. “And why didn’t we detect his life signs when we were scanning the ship?” 

“It is possible, Captain, that the location in which he was discovered might have shielded him from our scans. Further analysis showed that the walls of the room were reinforced, and as such, our scans failed to penetrate them.” 

Kelly turned a little more in her chair. “Like on the Dorahl bioship?” 

“Precisely, Commander.” 

“That’s strange.” Doctor Finn had been relatively quiet up until this point, obviously taking everything in, speaking only when she felt it was prudent to do so. “Why would only one room be reinforced that way?” 

“That is unclear at this time,” Isaac went on. “It is possible that the ship’s logs will provide an explanation.” 

Ed sighed. “Let’s hope so. At this point all we’ve got are questions.” He turned to their medical officer. “What about the body? Have you had a chance to examine it yet?” 

“Not in any great detail, Captain. I’ll let you know when I have the results but at this stage it looks like he died as a result of severe trauma.” 

Gordon was feeling more and more unsettled as time went on and he realised then that he had slouched down in his seat a little. As soon as he noticed he straightened up, once again drawing Ed’s eye, Kelly’s too that time, but he didn’t look in their direction. Like Ed had said they just had questions and no answers and all those bodies were bound to leave anyone feeling rattled. A glance to his side showed that Bortus appeared unfazed but that was a bad example. He looked across the table at Talla. Another bad example. 

“We need to know how they all died,” Kelly said gravely. “How much time do you need?” 

Doctor Finn was quiet for only a few moments, considering, before she responded with her usual confidence, “A few hours should be enough. We can have a team head over to the _Discovery_ and determine causes of death while I examine the body you recovered.” 

Gordon looked across and down the table at Ed, making a note to offer his friend a drink after shift. The other man looked _tired_ even if most of the people around the table wouldn’t be able to pick up on the little cues and tells that their Captain was displaying, subtle things like the way he held his shoulders and lifted one hand to rub it over his face before catching himself and thinking better of it, setting it back down on the flat of the table instead. He didn’t want anyone to know this was getting to him too. Gordon saw Kelly looking his way and the two of them exchanged a knowing glance. 

“Take all the time you need, Doctor,” Ed said, turning his attention to those he was addressing as he gave orders and directions. “John, Isaac, the two of you go over the data we pulled from the ship. Talla, you and Bortus see if you can find any information about where the _Discovery_ has been and what it’s been doing. If they went somewhere they weren’t supposed to go then we need to know about it.” He gave them all a few moments to let those orders sink in, giving them an opportunity to speak up on anything they weren’t clear of, but when nothing like that came he dismissed them. 

Gordon remained in his seat, sharing one last look with Kelly as the First Officer rose from her chair and left with the rest of the senior staff. Ed had remained seated as well and Gordon watched his friend, trying to figure out what he was thinking just by looking at him but this was one of those times when the other man wasn’t wearing his heart on his sleeve. “You okay, man?” 

When Ed lifted his head and looked across at him it was almost with surprise, as though he hadn’t realised Gordon was still in the room. Drawing in a breath he responded on the exhale, saying, “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good.” 

Gordon wasn’t convinced. He rose from his chair and moved a couple of seats up so he and Ed were directly opposite one another. “You sure about that?” Gordon wouldn’t dream of asking questions like this where anyone else could hear, he would never undermine Ed’s authority or make him out to be anything other than the rock steady leader the crew usually needed him to be. But it was just the two of them here and Ed knew his secrets were safe with Gordon. They wouldn’t leave this room. 

Ed kept his eyes down on the table, obviously deep in thought, but he gave the smallest shake of his head. “I’ve never seen anything like this.” His voice was quiet, subdued in a way that made Gordon feel even more unsettled. He hadn’t thought that was possible. 

“Yeah.” Gordon was glad someone had thought to deactivate the viewer on the wall. It was back to looking like a photograph, harmless and almost peaceful. “I didn’t even see it up close and—” He let out a rush of air. “What _happened_ over there?” 

Ed lifted his eyes then. “Honestly? I have no idea.” He shifted in his seat, leaning forward on the table again so he and Gordon were that little bit closer. “It was like being in the middle of a horror movie.” 

A bad taste settled on the back of Gordon’s tongue. “You think they might have been murdered?” 

With another shake of his head, his brows lifting, Ed said, “I don’t doubt it for a second. Injuries like that? There’s no other way.” 

“So who did it?” Gordon was glad it was just the two of them. He wouldn’t have wanted anyone to hear the slightly shaky quality his voice had adopted. 

“If I had to guess?” Ed tapped the fingertips of one hand on the table for a few moments, mulling it over, making his decision. “I’d say it was the man we found, the one isolated from the rest of the crew.” 

“So,” Gordon began slowly, frowning, “what? He killed everyone and then shut himself in that room to die?” 

Ed was quiet as he thought that over, the weariness coming back over his face as his shoulders dropped and he sat back in his seat. He sounded tired as he said, a little dejectedly, “I have no idea.” 

They fell quiet and Gordon watched his friend as Ed’s eyes fixed on a nondescript point on the wall near the viewer. His mind was going a mile a minute, Gordon could tell, and he found himself wondering if a drink after shift might not be such a good idea after all. Maybe that would just make things worse. 

“We’ll figure this out, man,” he said at last, once the quiet had stretched for a good couple of minutes and become almost oppressive, heavy and smothering in a way that made him feel physically uncomfortable. “We always do, right?” He pulled a smile into place and felt the faintest flicker of relief when Ed looked his way and managed to return it, even if only for a moment. Gordon gave a nod of his head, not needing a verbal response, clapping both palms lightly on the surface of the table before he got to his feet. “C’mon, Holmes. We got a mystery to solve.” 

Ed actually laughed at that, quietly and fleetingly, wearily, but Gordon counted it as a win anyway, following his friend out of the briefing room. If nothing else making Ed feel better had helped to ease a little of his own disquiet as well. Not a _lot_ , but enough that he could get back to work. Another small win, as far as Gordon was concerned.


	5. Brainstorm

It didn’t take long for the call to come from inside, granting her entry. With only a brief glance in the direction of the bridge Kelly took the invitation and stepped through the door as it opened for her, entering Ed’s office to find him sitting behind his desk. All it took was a single glance and she could tell he had a headache, the way he was slouched back in his seat in a manner he probably wouldn’t allow anyone else to see; he had tensed fleetingly as she had been crossing the threshold but once he had seen it was her he had relaxed back again. His monitor was active and though it was partially obscured from behind, just blurred enough that she couldn’t make out any details, she knew he was going over the various reports he had been sent relating to the mind-boggling mystery that was the _Discovery_. 

Without a word, after scanning the surface of his desk, Kelly headed for the synthesiser. She carried the glass to the desk and set it down in front of him even as she lowered herself into the chair opposite him. “Drink that,” she said, firmly but gently as well, a fine balance she had mastered over the years and not just during her marriage to the man she was facing now. 

Ed looked from the glass to her face and she could see in his eyes that he was thinking about arguing with her but ultimately he just didn’t have it in him. She saw the exact moment when he gave up the fight that hadn’t even started, the subtlest downward drop of his shoulders, and then he was picking up the glass and drinking the contents. 

It was only water, cold and fresh, but it would go a little way towards helping his head if it was as bad as she thought it was. He ought to go down to sickbay and get it taken care of, it would only take Claire a moment to get rid of it for him, but she knew how stubborn her ex-husband could be. No one knew that better than she did. 

For a minute she just sat there quietly and let him drain the glass, silently pleased that he did so without her having to prompt him any further. Only when he was finished with the water and setting the glass down on the desk to the side did she say anything at all, shifting a little in her seat to settle in for the long haul. “So what do we have?” She could have asked him if his head felt any better but she would give it a few minutes before she did. Business first. 

Drawing in a deep breath to brace himself Ed pulled himself forward in his chair, sitting a little more upright. After clearing his throat he gestured towards his screen, saying, “All the teams have checked in with their results.” He glanced her way as he added, “Unfortunately none of this makes any more sense now than it did before they gave me their reports.” 

“What do you mean?” Kelly hadn’t seen the reports herself yet. They had gone directly to Ed. 

“According to Bortus and Talla the _Discovery_ hasn’t been anywhere off-limits lately, they didn’t cross any territory lines they weren’t supposed to and there’s no record in the ship’s logs of any landing parties touching down anywhere they could have picked up anything contagious.” 

“Well that’s good.” 

“Yeah.” Ed nodded to show he was relieved by that fact as well. “But it doesn’t help us figure out what the hell happened over there.” 

“No,” Kelly conceded. “But at least we don’t have to worry about the crew contracting anything.” 

Ed made a small noise that told Kelly he agreed with her even though it obviously didn’t bring him much in the way of comfort. “John and Isaac have been through all of the files with a fine tooth comb and they couldn’t turn up anything new either.” 

Kelly sighed. “Damn.” She had been hoping they would uncover _something_ , some clue or breadcrumb that might lead them to a fact or two that would help them answer some of those questions that were piling up to near unbearable levels now. 

“And then there’s Claire’s report,” Ed said with a sigh, sitting back again, shaking his head almost in disbelief. “The man died as a result of severe physical trauma, internal and blunt force combined.” 

“So he was beaten to death?” 

“Basically. But it looked more like he’d been fighting _with_ someone, or several someones, before he succumbed to his injuries.” 

“What about the rest of the crew? Was that who he was fighting?” 

Ed shook his head, sitting forward and tapping a couple of keys to call up a fresh screen on his monitor. “The causes of death of the crew vary. We’ve got everything from shootings and stabbings to starvation and dehydration.” The look that came over his face was confusion edged with frustration and he turned a bewildered look in her direction. “How are we supposed to make sense of any of this?” 

Kelly was quiet for a moment, thinking over what Ed had told her, knitting her fingers together in front of her as she sat forward in her seat, frowning a little as she concentrated. “These were scientists and researchers,” she said finally, eyes narrowed as she regarded Ed from her seat, making sure she had his attention. Of course she did. Nowadays she didn’t really have to fight for it, she had noticed. “It doesn’t make sense that they would just start killing one another, not without good reason.” 

“What good reason could anyone have for bashing someone’s skull in?” Ed had looked back towards his screen with a grim expression on his face. 

“That’s my point,” she said to him, bringing his gaze back to her. “We can’t see it right now but there _has_ to be an explanation for all of this.” Something from his summary had stuck out to her and she couldn’t keep it to herself any longer. “You said some of the crew died of starvation and dehydration?” When he nodded she went on, “So, what? They just laid down and let themselves die?” Kelly shook her head decisively. “No one would do that. Not if they had a choice. We know they had supplies on the ship, there was no fault in their systems so their synthesisers would have been functioning. People don’t just lie down and die. They just don’t.” 

Though he was quiet she could tell from the crease in Ed’s brow and the downward turn of his eyes and mouth that he was thinking over what she had just said. Kelly had no doubt he had drawn those conclusions for himself as well, at least on some level, but with the mountain of baffling information several departments had piled on him all at once he had been having trouble picking out the most striking details. That was what Kelly was here for. She was here to help him pick through the noise to find the facts they needed. 

When he spoke his voice was quiet, sceptical and troubled, his eyes coming back up to her face. “They were _left_ to die.” 

It was a thought that had occurred to Kelly as well and it left a bad taste in her mouth, a vaguely churning sensation in her stomach kicking in at the same moment, and she bobbed her head slowly in agreement with Ed’s assessment. Whatever had happened on the _Discovery_ it had wiped out the entire crew, some of them violently and destructively, others much more quietly but no less sinisterly. Kelly honestly wasn’t sure what was worse, the thought of being bludgeoned to death or being incapacitated somehow and left to starve. 

“But _why_?” Ed was looking at her again and Kelly met his gaze with no answers to give, no strong suspicions or theories to offer. She was sorry for that, as ridiculous as it was to feel guilt for such a thing. During their time together on the _Orville_ they had encountered all sorts of puzzles and mysteries and every time they had gotten to the bottom of things and uncovered the truths. Kelly could only hope that this time was no different and as she looked into Ed’s eyes then she had to believe that they would. If not for her own sake then for his. 

“I don’t know,” she admitted. Her eyes narrowed again then as a thought struck her. “But maybe there’s some kind of pattern.” When Ed’s brow furrowed in a frown she went on, “We have the death reports from every member of the crew, right?” He sounded an affirmative. “Right, so we collect the names of those who were left to die, separate them from those whose deaths were more—” Kelly paused as she chose the right word, “—violent, and then maybe it’ll give us some ideas.” 

Ed was nodding, leaning a little to one side in his chair, resting his weight primarily on one arm. “That’s a good idea.” He drew in a breath, glancing towards the glass of water, frowning a little as he did it even as he said, “I’ll head down to sickbay and ask Claire if she can pull the list together for us.” 

Kelly had followed his gaze to the water glass and then turned her eyes back to his face. “You should get her to take care of your head while you’re there.” When he looked her way with a trace of surprise she smiled at him. “I know you, remember?” An unnecessary reminder but every now and then, for whatever reason, she liked to give him that little nudge anyway. 

Ed gave her the slightest smile in response, cocking his head briefly in a sort of surrender. “Fair enough. I should know better than to try by now, huh?” 

She was still smiling at him when he met her gaze again, the expression softening her words suitably. “You’re damn right.” 

Kelly wasn’t sure how long they might have stayed like that if it wasn’t for the call that came through over the comms. “Lieutenant Rendell to Captain Mercer.” 

Ed tapped his comms on his keyboard. “Mercer here.” 

“Captain, we have an emergency on Deck C. You should come down here right away.” The Lieutenant sounded alarmed and Kelly looked to Ed, troubled by that. She didn’t know Rendell well but she knew the other woman was steadfast and reliable, and not easily rattled. She had been on the _Discovery_ with Ed and the rest of the boarding party and anyone who had seen that mess and come out the other side still able to do their job was someone they could rely on. 

“I’m on my way.” Ed closed the channel and pushed up from his seat. Kelly didn’t wait for an invitation before she got to her feet and followed him out of his office, staying close on his heels as he descended the spiral staircase. As soon as she was able she came up to his side, walking with him rather than at his back, noting that all personnel they passed quickly stepped out of their way, giving small verbal or physical acknowledgements but there was no time to return them. 

When they rounded the corner and saw a group up ahead Kelly easily picked out the green jacket of Claire’s uniform. Rendell was there, as expected, along with Talla and a couple of others. Claire didn’t look up at them until they were passing Rendell who stepped aside to let them pass, saying as she did so, “We just found them like this. I called Doctor Finn right away.” 

Kelly felt an icy chill sweep down the length of her spine as she got a good look at the figures dropped on the ground. “Oh my God, John?” Along with Ed she crouched close to Claire but not so near to the doctor’s side that they would interfere with her work. She was scanning the two figures, her lips drawn in a thin line of concentration and concern. “Are they all right? What happened?” Kelly looked up towards Rendell and Talla, the former of whom shrugged, an apologetic look on her face. 

“We don’t know,” Talla said gravely. 

Ed lifted his gaze from the still frame of their Chief Engineer. “Doctor?” 

“Commander LaMarr is alive but unresponsive,” Claire said, bringing her head up at last, obviously done with her scans. Kelly saw in her eyes before she said anything further that something terrible was coming. That knowledge didn’t do much to soften the blow. “Ensign Curtis is dead.”


	6. Out of the Frying Pan

With a glance to his side Gordon took in the stern figure of Bortus walking alongside him as they travelled briskly through the ship, making their way to sickbay. They had received orders from the Captain to head there immediately and as they walked, Gordon having to trot occasionally in order to keep up with the Moclan beside him, he couldn’t help but wonder why. If there had been another development why weren’t they heading to the briefing room? 

“What do you think’s going on?” He couldn’t help but ask the question, looking briefly to his side. 

Bortus didn’t even so much as glance in his direction. “I do not know.” 

“Yeah,” Gordon conceded, gesturing a little, vaguely and helplessly, “but I mean if you had to guess. What do you think?” 

“There is no use in guessing,” Bortus said to him, his tone just as serious and steady as always. “We will learn what has happened when we reach sickbay.” He did glance in Gordon’s direction then and the meaning behind the look was clear: _stop asking questions_. 

Gordon couldn’t help but be somewhat cowed by that look, holding his hands up a little as if to apologise but keeping quiet otherwise. The Second Officer was in no mood to talk or speculate, clearly. As travel companions went he had drawn something of a short straw. Gordon was almost thankful when they rounded the next corner and came within sight of the doors to their destination. Bortus reached them first and entered ahead of him, but he could see the figures of the rest of the senior staff already gathered inside. Gordon frowned, about to open his mouth to ask what was going on when Bortus cleared his view by stepping around to head to the back of the group and what they were surrounding. 

“John?” Gordon brought his gaze up and looked at everyone in turn, ending with Ed and Kelly. “What the hell?” 

“That’s not all,” Ed said gravely and directed Gordon’s gaze with a small nod of his head towards the back of the room where there was a covered figure on one of the beds by the window. “Ensign Curtis,” Ed clarified when Gordon gave him a bewildered look. 

“ _What_?” Gordon felt his blood run cold and he stepped closer to the bed they were all surrounding. He had been about to ask if Curtis was really dead but the expressions on everyone’s faces, grim and severe, told him all he needed to know. His eyes dropped to the figure at their centre. “What about John? What’s wrong with him?” 

Talla was to his side and she was the one to speak up. “Rendell and I were heading to Engineering and we found the two of them in the corridor, just lying there. We couldn’t get a response out of either one so we called Doctor Finn.” 

At that point Gordon looked to their Chief Medical Officer who was busy working through scans on the device in her hand. She responded without looking up for more than a second, clearly engrossed in her work and not wanting to stop, “I haven’t confirmed yet just how long Ensign Curtis has been dead but it couldn’t have been more than five minutes by the time Talla found him.” She briefly met Gordon’s gaze and he saw the flash of sympathy there, almost maternal, as she said, “As for John I’m still running tests but right now?” She shook her head and sighed quietly, dropping her eyes back to her scans. “I’m at a bit of a loss.” 

“Is there any chance they contracted something?” Kelly asked. “A contagion of some kind, something they might have picked up from the _Discovery_?” 

“It’s nothing like that, at least not that I can tell,” Doctor Finn said and she sounded certain, ruling out the possibility. 

“It is worth noting that Ensign Curtis did not set foot aboard the vessel.” They all looked to Isaac as he spoke from near the head of the bed, to the side of where Bortus had come to stand. “And scans of the _Orville_ have confirmed that there is no detectable airborne toxic aboard.” 

“Yeah, nothing _detectable_ ,” Gordon muttered under his breath, not meaning for anyone to hear him, but from the way several heads turned in his direction it seemed like they had anyway. He felt obligated to explain himself but he didn’t have the words ready, shifting his weight from one foot to the next, trying not to fixate on the still body of his friend on the bed before them. “I just mean—” Dammit, he should have just kept his mouth shut. Gordon forged on regardless, unable to help the way his hands moved needlessly before him as he spoke, gesturing emptily as he said, “With all the crazy crap we’ve found out here isn’t it possible there’s some kind of weird virus we _can’t_ detect? At least not yet?” He tried not to look as desperate as he felt as he glanced around at the faces of those gathered, needing more than wanting someone to agree with him. 

Ed’s brow was furrowed as he said, “It certainly wouldn’t be the strangest thing that’s happened to us.” 

“And at this point,” Kelly added, “what do we have to lose by considering the possibility?” 

Gordon felt about ten pounds lighter all of a sudden and he tried to show his gratitude when he met each of their gazes as they looked his way, turning his head to Doctor Finn as she spoke up again. 

“If that _is_ the case, Captain, we need to quarantine the entire ship. No one off, no one on, not until we know for certain that this isn’t contagious.” She had glanced at Talla as she said that for backup from their Chief of Security who gave a decisive nod to show her support of the suggestion. “And it might be worth getting some distance from that ship as well.” Before anyone else could speak up and challenge her she held up a hand and added quickly, “Not a _lot_ , but just enough for us to ascertain whether or not it makes any kind of difference.” 

“You think it might be the _ship_?” Ed asked. 

It was Isaac who responded instead. “As Lieutenant Malloy suggested, Captain, it is possible that we cannot yet detect the source. Distancing ourselves from the _Discovery_ may yield some positive result.” The Kaylon gave them all a moment to absorb that before he went on, “We have collected a sufficient amount of data from the vessel and can continue to examine it without maintaining our current position.” 

With a small sigh Kelly looked to Ed. “It’s worth a shot.” 

At this point what else did they have? Gordon could see the same thought passing through his best friend’s mind before Ed gave a decisive nod of his head. It was at times like this that he _really_ didn’t envy the other man, having to make all of these choices that could affect the entire crew, potentially in a life or death manner. 

“All right. Let’s back off to a safe distance. Isaac, continue to examine the data you and John collected and do us all a favour: run another full scan of the _Orville_ , make sure we’re definitely not carrying anything contagious.” 

“Yes, Captain.” The Kaylon took that as his cue to leave and within moments most of the rest of the senior staff were heading out as well. 

Gordon watched them go, waiting until they were all gone before he turned back to Doctor Finn. “Hey, Doc’?” When she raised her head he almost apologised for bothering her but summoned his courage and asked instead, “Is he going to be all right?” 

For a few moments she looked between Gordon and their Chief Engineer, and then to the device in her hand. When she met his gaze again her expression was difficult to read and he guessed she had masked it intentionally, not wanting to give him false hope or alarm him unduly. “It’s too early to tell,” she said to him, “but I’m going to do everything I can to get him through this.” Her brows lifted, like she was asking him if he believed her and he gave her a small nod. 

“Okay, Doc’.” Gordon nodded again, more certainly this time, remembering that the decision had been made to move the _Orville_ and that was on him. He was needed at the helm. “Thanks.” He backed up a little. “He’s in good hands. The best.” He turned to leave then but not before he saw the faintest smile touch the Doctor’s lips. Something told Gordon it disappeared the second he turned his back. 

 

* * *

 

“And you have no idea what’s causing any of it?” 

Halsey sounded how Ed imagined they all felt, well and truly thrown and so far beyond confused that the word didn’t even begin to apply. “I’m afraid not, Admiral, at least not yet. We’re working on it.” Right now those words felt so weak, almost a little absurd. Telling the Admiral that they didn’t have the first clue what was happening here was embarrassing, in a way, but Ed had learned from experience it was best to be upfront with those at the top. As much as he liked to be proactive and self-sufficient part of him hoped Halsey would have some suggestions. It felt like they could all use them right about now. 

“You understand we can’t set another ship out there until you know exactly what’s causing this?” 

“Yes, Sir, I understand.” Ed wouldn’t have wanted another crew to head out here and possibly suffer the same fate his own seemed to be falling victim to. There were only two people struck down so far but there was a knot in the pit of his stomach that told him they weren’t out of the woods yet, possibly not by a long shot. He hoped that knot was dead wrong but he could usually trust his gut and he suspected this would be no exception. 

With a sigh Halsey reclined in his seat on the other side of the screen. “I hate to say it, but it looks like you’re on your own for the time being, Captain. Keep us informed and be careful out there. You’re a long way out.” 

“And we’ve got a lot of unanswered questions on our hands,” Ed said. “It feels like we’re getting more by the hour.” 

The Admiral shook his head and then sat forward again, leaning his arms on his desk. “We’ll do everything we can for you on our end, Captain.” For a moment it almost looked like he wanted to say more, give some kind of promise of help should the _Orville_ need it, but Ed knew the words wouldn’t come. That was a promise the Admiral couldn’t make, not in their current situation. He wasn’t surprised by what came next instead. “Halsey out.” And then the communication dropped leaving Ed alone in the quiet of his office. 

He sat back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger and sighing heavily. It didn’t do anything to alleviate the headache that was still droning through his skull and he glanced at the empty glass sitting where he had left it on the desk off to one side. Given what had happened with John and Ensign Curtis it hadn’t felt appropriate to bother Claire with something as insignificant as a _headache_ of all things. The request for the list of victims from the _Discovery_ and respective causes of death, however, he _had_ taken the time to ask for but the results wouldn’t be back in for a while yet. 

Ed glanced around the office, scanning his gaze over the furniture and various bits and pieces on the coffee table and the desk in front of him. He sighed, heavily and loudly. There was nothing more to be done in here and he had given orders to move the _Orville_. It didn’t seem right to leave things to Kelly while he sat by himself with more scattered and increasingly desperate thoughts than he knew what to do with. It would be a much better use of his time to be _doing_ something, even if it was just sitting in a chair on the bridge. 

When he stood it was decisively that he did so, pushing off the arms of the chair and wasting no time in heading from his office to the bridge. Kelly spotted him at once and vacated his seat, moving to her station and lowering herself to it almost in synch with him as he claimed his own chair. She glanced his way and he met her gaze, giving her a small dip of his head to tell her everything was as okay as it could be under the circumstances. He would brief her later on what the Admiral had said, not that there was much to tell, but it was information she needed to have anyway as First Officer. 

Gordon was at the helm working the controls. “Course laid in and ready to execute on your command, Captain.” 

“Do it, Lieutenant.” From the front of the bridge Gordon acknowledged and got the _Orville_ underway. It was a small jump, enough of a distance that they felt anything coming off the other ship wouldn’t be able to reach them but not so far that they couldn’t still pick it up on sensors. Gordon confirmed their new position, going through the motions, and Ed sounded off a habitual acknowledgement of his own, looking over to Talla and Bortus who were busy at their respective stations, various pieces of data on the screens in front of them. 

He met Kelly’s eyes and she gave him a small smile, as if to tell him this was going to work, that whatever had started to affect the crew would lose its grip on them now. Ed wanted to return the simple gesture but before he could a voice sounded from his comm. 

“Doctor Finn to Captain Mercer.” Something about the Doctor’s voice made that knot in the pit of his stomach tighten, and not gently either. 

He tapped his comm. “What is it, Doctor?” 

“Captain, we have a situation in sickbay. You and Commander Grayson had better come down here.” 

Ed looked to Kelly and saw the same suspicion and dread in her eyes that he felt in himself. “Bortus, you have the conn.” It was as he stood that he realised one of the stations on the bridge was empty and he paused to look back, even as the Moclan was heading over to claim the command chair. “Where’s Isaac?” 

“Last I saw him was in sickbay,” Gordon said from the helm, turning in his seat and shrugging his shoulders. 

No one else chimed in. Ed might have pushed the issue but Doctor Finn’s tone hadn’t left much room for delay so he gave a small shake of his head, glancing at Kelly, and then led the way off the bridge. It was as they were descending the spiral staircase that he tapped his own comm again. “Mercer to Isaac.” Nothing. “Isaac, respond.” More silence. 

Kelly tapped her comm. “Grayson to Isaac, come in.” There was no response. Kelly didn’t sound happy as she said, “This isn’t like him.” 

“No. It’s not.” Ed couldn’t think of a single time Isaac had refused to respond when his own people weren’t involved in some way and honestly the less he thought about the Kaylon Conflict the better. Already the droning in his skull was starting to increase, becoming more of a throb, and as they neared sickbay and saw one of the medical staff dart inside hastily he suspected it was about to get a whole lot worse. The doors hissed open as they neared them. 

God, Ed hated being right sometimes. 

It looked as though every bed was suddenly occupied, officers from every department laid out motionlessly with a member of the medical team hovering over them working busily. Ed had stopped in the doorway with Kelly, rooted to the spot by their shock at the sight that had awaited them. The sound of Doctor Finn issuing a command for one of her staff to hurry got him moving and he stepped inside just enough to activate the console inside the door. 

“Computer, locate Isaac.” Ed hadn’t been able to see him anywhere in sickbay. Part of him had been hoping the Kaylon had been caught up in whatever was going on here. 

The computer chimed, its internal scans complete. “Isaac is not aboard the _Orville_.” 

When the automated voice came back with those words Ed turned to look at Kelly in utter disbelief, feeling almost like he’d been punched in the gut. What the _hell_ was going on?


	7. Into the Fire

“They’re all in comas, Captain.” Claire watched as Captain Mercer turned his head from the window at the far wall of her office through which he could see the closed drapes at the back of the room that were concealing the bodies that they did not want seen by anyone who might wander into sick bay without any knowledge of what had transpired in the last hour, give or take. “The ones that are still alive, at least,” she amended, seeing the stormy look in the Captain’s eyes. It wasn’t aimed at her, she knew, but it was a rare enough expression on the man’s face that it would have given most of the crew pause, herself included. 

Commander Grayson was sitting in one of the chairs on the other side of the desk, seemingly lost in thought until she spoke, her voice quieted by a combination of disbelief and confusion. “What happened to them?” She was talking about the bodies, Claire knew. 

Captain Mercer had gone back to looking out of the window at the closed drapes and from the tight line of his shoulders Claire knew they were weighing on him, that he was already holding himself accountable for those deaths. “Ensign Revak suffered massive internal bleeding as a result of severe physical trauma, every single one of his ribs was shattered. Lieutenant Hill was found at the base of the spiral staircase, seemingly after falling from a height. It was the fall that killed him.” Claire paused for a moment before saying by way of conclusion, “And Lieutenant Allron was choked.” 

“To _death_?” Captain Mercer turned to look back over his shoulder, frowning deeply, seemingly struggling to comprehend what she had just told them even after seeing the bodies for himself. The ugly bruises around Lieutenant Allron’s neck had been unmistakable, even to anyone without any real medical expertise. “I thought his species—” 

“Has especially tough skin?” Claire concluded on his behalf and watched as he dipped his head in a small nod. “Like an elephant or a rhino from Old Earth, yes, you’re right. But whoever it was that choked him was stronger. It’s as simple as that.” 

Captain Mercer and Commander Grayson exchanged a glance. It was the latter who asked, “How many people on board would be strong enough to accomplish that?” 

“Taking all crew and civilian personnel into account?” Claire knitted her hands together in front of her as she considered her records and the information they provided on all individuals aboard the _Orville_. “I can think of several off the top of my head. I would say we’re looking at a dozen suspects at least, and that’s just based on the names I can call to mind.” It wasn’t the information they were looking for, she could tell, but it was all she had for them. 

Captain Mercer turned from the window completely then, swiping one hand over his face, dropping his hand to his side as he said, “The question is whether or not to discount Isaac because of his absence or consider him even _more_ of a suspect because of it.” Instead of sitting in the free chair he rested his hands on the back of it, leaning his weight forward a little, looking to his First Officer. Claire watched them looking at each other, wondering just how much they were able to communicate with one another in such glances. It wasn’t the first time she had wondered that. 

“The bigger question is what happened to him,” Commander Grayson returned, turning her eyes to Claire. “When was the last time you saw him, Doctor?” 

It was a tricky question when it perhaps shouldn’t have been and she could see in their eyes that they thought so too. Many of the crew avoided asking her about Isaac, and had done ever since the Kaylon Conflict, and she could understand why they did so even if it wasn’t necessary. She suspected she had actually been the first to approach the Kaylon after the battle and his self-imposed exile from his species, that she was the only one so far who had directly broached the subject of forgiveness with him. After what Isaac had done for Ty, saving his life like that, saving them _all_ really, it had felt like the right step to take. The _only_ step, really. 

“Not since the briefing following the discovering of Chief LaMarr,” she said with a shake of her head. “Has anyone checked the security logs?” After a moment she added, “I know that’s probably stating the obvious.” 

With a small shake of his head Captain Mercer looked up to meet her gaze. “Not yet. We’ll get Talla to go through it, see if we can figure out what happened to him.” He looked back to Commander Grayson. “We should make sure everyone else is accounted for.” 

She nodded her head in agreement. “I’ll get on it.” She hesitated, eyes narrowing a little, and then said somewhat cautiously, “It might be an idea to consider carrying weapons.” 

“We can’t risk it.” Captain Mercer stood to his full height, taking his weight from the chair. “Until we know what’s going on we can’t have people running around with guns.” His eyes turned to Claire and she was ready to meet his gaze. “The people in comas, do you have any ideas as to _why_?” 

“I’m working on that, Captain,” she told him, wanting to give him some kind of reassurance even if it wasn’t much at this point. “I’m running every test I can think of to try and figure out the connection. Other than being completely unresponsive there doesn’t seem to be anything physically wrong with any of them.” 

“It doesn’t make any sense.” Commander Grayson’s voice was quiet, barely above a whisper, her eyes fixed on a nondescript point on Claire’s desk. 

“Well,” Captain Mercer said, as decisively as he could under the circumstances, “let’s _make_ it make sense, and as soon as possible.” He looked between the two women present, adding, “If word gets out that we have no clue what’s causing this we could have a panic on our hands.” 

“And that’s the last thing we need,” Commander Grayson concluded, agreeing with the Captain at the same time, pushing herself to her feet with her hands on the arms of the chair. “You’ll let us know the second you have something?” she asked Claire, who gave her a firm nod of her head. 

“You two will be the first to know,” Claire told them, rising to her feet as well. She had a lot of work to do, and not much time in which to do it. 

 

* * *

 

“It doesn’t make any sense.” Kelly shook her head and looked down at Talla as the Xelayan glanced up from her station. Their eyes turned back to the footage on the screen and the complete absence of answers it provided. “It’s like he disappeared. I don’t understand.” She took her hand from the back of the Security Chief’s chair and touched it briefly to her brow, trying to make the pieces fit together. 

The footage was clear. Isaac had left sick bay along with everyone else and headed for the bridge by way of his lab but somewhere in the middle it was like he had simply ceased to exist. “How can that be possible?” In a way it was a rhetorical question but Talla looked up at her anyway. 

“It’s possible he was beamed off the ship, Commander,” she said, sounding as though she didn’t quite believe it but scepticism was the healthy norm for their Chief of Security and therefore it wasn’t out of place. “I heard about the time you and Captain Mercer were transported that way.” 

“To a Calivon zoo, yeah.” Kelly didn’t exactly relish the memory but it was a decent enough point on the other woman’s part. Standing with her hands on her hips for a moment she considered it. “Would there be any trace of anything like that?” Frustratingly Isaac was the one she would have asked to investigate under normal circumstances but she couldn’t exactly do that right now. The irony of that wasn’t lost on her. 

“I’m not sure,” Talla admitted. “Isaac or Chief LaMarr would know, but—” 

“We can’t ask them.” Kelly frowned, her frustration building. “Right.” She glanced to her left a little, considering Bortus. “Can you two put your heads together and figure this out? Maybe you can bring Yaphit in on the investigation?” 

Bortus looked up from his station after exchanging a glance with Talla. “We can try, Commander.” 

Kelly dipped her head in a nod. “Good. Let us know if you find anything.” With that she turned and left the bridge, trusting the Moclan Second Officer to assume command in her absence. She made a beeline for Ed’s office and hit the chime, only having to wait a second for his call from within before stepping over the threshold. “You’re not going to believe this,” she said as she stepped inside, the doors hissing closed smoothly behind her, “but Isaac vanished into thin air. Gone.” She snapped her fingers. “Just like that.” 

“ _What_? You’re kidding.” 

“I wish I was.” She crossed to the window and glanced out of it for only a second before turning back towards Ed’s desk, throwing her hands up in exasperation. “What the hell are we dealing with here?” 

“I don’t know.” Ed was just as much at a loss as she was. “I’ve never heard of anything like this.” He was leaning forward in his chair, his arms on the desk, hands flat almost as if he was desperately wishing for some way to occupy them but then he was lifting them and using them to gesture as he spoke again. “We’ve got a ghost ship with half the crew dying of hunger or thirst and the rest of them killing each other in a variety of gruesome ways.” 

“Don’t forget the creepy half-written message on the wall,” Kelly offered. 

Ed glanced her way, looking a little troubled for a second, as if he had tried to put that detail out of his mind. “Right.” He was back on track then. “Now we’ve got members of our own crew lapsing into comas, seemingly without cause, along with four mysterious deaths, at least two of which are murders.” 

“Which also leaves us with at least one murderer roaming the halls.” 

“Exactly.” Ed sighed. “And now we’ve got a missing Kaylon and no explanation as to what the hell happened to him.” He looked in her direction. “Did I miss anything?” 

With a shake of her head Kelly approached the desk but she didn’t sit. She felt too restless to occupy a chair. Something was going around and around in her mind and she had been considering it for a while but now it was right there in the forefront and it seemed like the time to get it out in the open. “The comas,” she said, drawing Ed’s attention her way. “The people on the _Discovery_ who just laid down and died.” 

Ed straightened in his chair. “They didn’t just lay down and die. They were _comatose_.” 

“That’s what I’m thinking.” Surely Claire had come to the same conclusion, or would very soon. Not much got by their Chief Medical Officer. “This has to be some kind of pandemic.” 

“But that doesn’t explain the attacks.” Ed said those words as if he believed all of their dead crew members had been attacked. Kelly was inclined to believe him. If nothing else there was no way Lieutenant Hill had fallen to his death without someone to help him along. It was such a grim thought that Kelly instantly tasted something bad on the back of her tongue. Her grimace gave her away, she suspected, because the next thing she knew Ed was synthesising a couple of drinks and offering one to her. She didn’t even ask what it was, trusting to his judgement, accepting the glass and sipping the scotch from the rim gratefully. Maybe now wasn’t the right time for alcohol but one drink wasn’t going to hurt them. In their shared experience it often helped. 

She let the taste of the scotch work its way back over her tongue and down her throat as she thought the matter through, feeling Ed’s gaze on her as she did so. “What if this _is_ a pandemic of some kind,” she began, lifting her eyes to meet his. He hadn’t moved back around to his side of the desk, choosing instead to stay standing only a little over a foot away from her now. It allowed them to speak a little more intimately, with hushed voices, almost conspiratorially. “But whatever it is,” she went on, “it affects different people in different ways.” 

Ed was frowning too as he considered what she had said. “Some people it renders comatose and others it—what? Drives to kill?” 

Kelly raised her eyebrows. “Maybe. Like Gordon said, it wouldn’t be the strangest thing to happen to us out here.” 

“God.” Ed lifted his drink and took a generous mouthful of the alcohol. “We need to figure out a way to tell who’s infected.” He set the glass down on the desk, unfinished. “Right now.”

With a nod Kelly copied him, wishing she could down the rest of the scotch but knowing now wasn’t the time. It had done its job anyway, giving both of them the boost they needed to get over the roadblock that had been holding them up. She was hot on Ed’s heels as he headed out of his office but she reached out and touched his arm briefly before they could reach the staircase. He turned back to her with a questioning furrow in his brow and she nodded her head towards the panel in the wall not too far away, the one sealed with a coded touchpad. “Just in case,” she said, watching as he hesitated only for a moment before crossing to the panel and punching in the code that popped the lock to reveal the weapons concealed within. When he handed one to her she accepted it soberly, hating the idea of putting the thing to use against one of their own but knowing it was better to have it and not need it than wish for it later when it was much too late to do anything about it. 

They headed down through the ship, making their way to sick bay, moving with purpose and drive now that they had some kind of idea of what might be going on. Kelly had already checked the weapon when Ed had handed it to her, ensuring it was set to stun, but as they moved she felt compelled to check it again and she had her eyes turned down as they rounded a corner. She missed Ed coming up short and bumped into his back as a result, catching herself against him with one hand and looking over his shoulder at whatever it was that had given him pause. 

What she saw made her blood run cold, her bottom jaw dropping, barely able to believe what her eyes were telling her brain was happening right there in the middle of the corridor. 

Rendell had Marcombe up against the wall, one hand pinning him by the neck with the other down at waist height. That other hand was wrapped around the handle of a blade that had been thrust all the way up to the hilt into the younger officer’s abdomen. As they watched the Lieutenant turned her head, her eyes fixing on the two of them as the Ensign struggled weakly where she had him pinned to the wall like an insect. 

It wasn’t just Kelly’s blood that felt cold then but every inch of her. There was something about Rendell’s eyes that was just _wrong_ and after only a few moments spent staring into them she figured out what it was. 

There was nothing there. Nothing at all.


	8. Without Warning

“Oh my God.” 

Kelly was standing so close behind him that he didn’t have to strain to hear her voice, made small and quiet by her disbelief though it was. The words were echoed in his own mind but he didn’t take the time to form them, casting them aside for others instead, calling down the corridor, “Lieutenant, _stop_.” Even before Rendell failed to react to the authoritative command he knew it would be in vain, that it wouldn’t have the desired effect. 

What it did seem to do was make things worse and Ed felt the breath he had been taking stop painfully in his throat as Rendell twisted the blade she had buried in her fellow security officer’s gut. The sound it made was wet and vicious, made that much worse by the backward wrench that followed it, freeing the weapon from her victim’s body with a gush of fresh, hot blood. Marcombe buckled back against the wall, clutching weakly at his stomach, and then dropped like a stone. 

Ed didn’t shout again, biting back a curse as he raised the weapon in his hand and fired off a shot. Rendell had been ready for it, already ducking before he had finished squeezing the trigger, and the shot struck the wall behind her instead. Ed did curse then even as he was tracking the woman’s movements to take another shot. 

Before he could fire Kelly had grabbed hold of him and yanked him back towards her, calling his name in a warning in the same instant. His body collided with hers with enough force to make them both stumble. They staggered back around the corner, almost falling, just as something shot past them at speed and struck the wall behind where they had been standing only moments before. With wide eyes Ed looked from the knife, buried a good couple of inches _in_ the wall, and then to Kelly. Her own shock was better masked than his own, her weapon raised now as she shifted her gaze to the corner around which they had taken refuge. 

Knowing that Kelly was covering their position Ed took the opportunity to up the setting on his PM-44. Even though he had missed with the first shot Rendell’s behaviour, the unbridled aggression she was displaying, made him want to be sure she would go down when he did hit her. He had to assume Kelly had taken the same precaution. There was no time to check. 

He couldn’t hear Rendell coming but a shadow played on that far wall not far from the embedded knife, telling him all he needed to know about her position. At his back he felt Kelly tensing in preparation as well. Ed raised his weapon to chest height and waited. 

Rendell appeared. He squeezed the trigger. It hit her square in the chest and threw her back and down to the ground. Ed kept the weapon trained on her even as she dropped, not trusting that he wouldn’t need it again until several seconds had passed and the woman failed to move again beyond the rise and fall of her chest that showed she was still breathing. 

Kelly moved around him without a word and went over to check the threat had been neutralised, leaving Ed free to move around the corner, breaking into a sprint as soon as he saw the way was clear. He covered the distance to where Marcombe had slumped to the ground in only a few seconds but it still felt like too long. The PM-44 went to the ground as he dropped to his knees so both hands were free and he immediately put them to the wound in the Ensign’s stomach, applying as much pressure as he could to try and keep the young man from bleeding out. The wet heat of the wound, the sheer amount of blood that had already flowed free, was enough to make Ed’s stomach start tying itself in knots. 

“Grayson to Finn, we have a medical emergency on Deck C.” Kelly had taken it upon herself to call for help while Ed tried to keep pressure on the wound. Really that was something he should have done himself. Ed took only a second to feel the flash of guilt and self-reproach that followed in the wake of that realisation before he pushed those things out of his mind. There was no time for them now. “Lieutenant Keyali,” Kelly went on, “we need a security detail down here as well, as quick as you can.” 

Ed didn’t wait to hear the acknowledgements, his eyes fixed on the Ensign down in front of him. “Marcombe?” The young officer’s eyes were closed, his face pale, a sheen of sweat breaking out over the skin of his brow. “Marcombe, come on, stay awake.” It was probably a futile effort but Ed wasn’t going to give up. He couldn’t. They had already lost far too many people and he would be damned if he didn’t try everything in his power to keep from losing any more. 

 

* * *

 

Doctor Finn had worked frantically to save Ensign Marcombe’s life, shouting orders to her staff in a loud, clear voice that commanded respect and immediate response. Ed and Kelly had watched from the side of the room without being able to do a single thing to help. It was all they could do to stay out of the way of all the urgent movement by the medical team as they hurried from one place to the next retrieving equipment and medication in their efforts to keep the young officer alive. 

By the time it was finished there was a heartbeat, albeit a weak one, and Doctor Finn had let out a sigh that was neither defeated nor relieved. Ed hadn’t known what to make of it but the Doctor hadn’t waited for the commanding officers to ask for her prognosis. “He’s weak but he’s stable for now,” she told them both, sounding wearied by the work that had just been done. “We’ll have to keep a close eye on him to make sure he doesn’t take a turn for the worse.” 

Ed turned his head to look at Kelly, seeing in her eyes the same grim sense of uncertainty that he felt. “How are the others doing?” she asked, glancing around the room. It was starting to feel crowded in sick bay, every bed that they could see occupied by unmoving figures from all departments. 

“No changes yet, but I’ve had some results back from my tests,” Doctor Finn said, and indicated her office before she headed in that direction. As soon as she moved away from Marcombe’s side someone else stepped in to take her place, keeping a watchful eye on his vital signs. 

Following Kelly into Doctor’s Finn office Ed started to raise a hand to rub at his eyes but stopped when he caught sight of it, the skin stained an ugly brownish red. The blood had gone cold by now, it had dried completely, flaking a little over the creases in his palms and the joints of his fingers. Ed had forgotten all about it. With a glance downward he confirmed what he suspected he would find: the blue of his uniform jacket was smeared and streaked with Ensign Marcombe’s blood as well. He couldn’t even remember that happening but it made sense. In their haste to get the young officer down to sick bay Ed had scooped him up from the ground himself and carried him here personally. Did he have blood anywhere else? There was no way to check now and there was nothing he would be able to do about most of it until he could get back to his quarters. 

As Doctor Finn moved around her desk Ed unfastened the zipper on the jacket and shrugged it off his shoulders. Kelly glanced in his direction but didn’t say a word, stepping forward to set the PM-44s she had been carrying this entire time on the surface of the Doctor’s desk. She must have recovered his from the corridor, Ed realised. 

“There’s an identical foreign marker in the blood of every single comatose crewmember,” Doctor Finn said to them. She had remained standing but she had her hands touched to the surface of her desk as she looked between the two of them, a posture that made her appear more troubled and tired than Ed could remember seeing her in some time. “As terrible as it sounds it became easier to spot when I had more patients in the same condition,” she went on, gesturing towards the space beyond her office where her staff worked diligently. 

“What kind of foreign marker?” Kelly asked with a small shake of her head. 

“I’m running more tests to be sure but it almost looks like _tissue_ of some kind.” 

Ed felt his eyes widen. “ _In_ the blood?” 

“Yes.” Doctor Finn waved her hand in the air for a moment as she went on, “I’ve never seen anything like it, personally, not even in all my years as a medical officer.” Her hand went back to the desk. 

“Is it—” Kelly paused for a moment as she searched for the right word, “—living tissue?” 

“No, at least not anymore. In all likelihood it _was_ but it’s fragmented and degraded, as if whatever it came from has already started to break down in our crew’s bodies.” 

Ed stepped closer to the Doctor’s desk, draping his jacket over the back of one of the free chairs. “Wait a minute.” He needed to think this through, try to make sense of it somehow, but the information was so unexpected and out of the blue that every time he grasped one thing that he thought he could make heads or tails of another piece came along and made a mess of everything else all over again. “Let’s lay out what we know,” he said finally, holding his hands out in the sort of appeasing manner he would use with an aggressor, turning his eyes from one woman to the other. 

“We have an exploratory vessel filled with dead bodies,” Kelly said, getting the ball rolling. 

Doctor Finn picked up the thread next. “Half of whom were murdered, while the other half died of natural causes while comatose.” 

“Now _our_ crew is slipping into comas, seemingly at random,” Ed added. 

Kelly nodded towards their Chief Medical Officer. “But they all have this same foreign marker in their blood, this alien tissue.” 

“And we have a spate of murders, or attempted murders,” the Doctor continued. 

“Seemingly without any real motive behind them.” He shook his head. 

“And let’s not forget our missing Science Officer,” Kelly interjected, pointing a finger in his direction though it was a gesture free of any sort of accusation. 

“Right.” Ed sighed then. “Can’t forget that.” He looked between the two women. “Are we missing anything?” 

Doctor Finn straightened on her side of the desk. “I was thinking about Lieutenant Rendell, Captain.” 

“What about her?” 

“Well, it might be worth drawing a sample of _her_ blood as well.” 

Ed considered that, glancing to Kelly, who was obviously doing the same. “You think you might find something strange in Rendell’s blood?” he asked even if it was a question with an obvious answer. Doctor Finn wouldn’t have suggested it otherwise. At this point though it didn’t hurt to be clear about everything. 

“It’s possible,” Doctor Finn said thoughtfully, her eyes narrowed a little, her mind clearly working away at those possibilities even before she had what she needed to run her tests. “I’d like to be sure either way.” 

Drawing in a deep breath, trying not to think about how badly he needed a coffee, Ed nodded his head. “All right. Then we’ll get you the blood sample.” 

 

* * *

 

It was a little strange to see Ed walking through the ship in an incomplete uniform. Kelly found herself repeatedly glancing in his direction because the sight was so odd, so unusual, that it was actually distracting. She had thought about suggesting he go on and change before they headed to the brig but she knew he wouldn’t agree to it, not given what they were dealing with. 

They had more important matters to take care of. “Maybe we should take the ship to Yellow Alert.” 

He turned his head in her direction, considered it for only a moment, and then nodded his head in agreement. 

Kelly tapped her comm. “Commander Grayson to the Bridge. Take us to Yellow Alert.” 

It was Bortus who responded. “Aye, Commander.” Only moments later the light panels along the walls shifted from their usual blue to the amber hue that would tell the crew the _Orville_ was dealing with a serious situation even if most of them wouldn’t know what exactly that situation was for the time being. Kelly wasn’t even sure what the situation was yet and she knew Ed felt the same, that frustration and sense of confusion that neither one of them cared for in the least. As commanding officers they liked to have the facts and feel prepared for whatever came next, they liked to have plans of action in place, and more than anything they liked to know what they were dealing with. 

Right now it felt like they didn’t have any of that. 

With a glance at Ed she considered trying to remind him that they would handle this, whatever _this_ was, but it would feel like an empty platitude and so she refrained. Instead she looked down to the electron hypodermic in her hand. It would be an easy enough process if Rendell wasn’t combative but Kelly hoped that the Lieutenant was still unconscious. One of Claire’s team had assessed the security officer when they had responded to the call in the corridor on Deck C and ascertained with a quick scan that the woman was unharmed and could therefore be transported directly to the brig. There had been no need to take her to sick bay first. With any luck she would still be out cold after taking the blast Ed had fired at her at close range. 

When they reached the brig Talla turned to look at them from her place in front of the cell. There were two other officers in the room, one of them holding a PM-488 Titan. Kelly might not have thought that was necessary if she hadn’t seen Rendell in action in the corridor not too long ago. Talla looked from one commanding officer to the other and then spotted the hypodermic in Kelly’s hand. “Commander?” 

Ed had moved up to the front of the cell as well and Kelly came up close enough to see that Rendell was indeed still unconscious, or she appeared to be at least. “Open it,” Ed said to Talla, who hesitated, looking down at the hypodermic again. It almost seemed like she was going to question the order, or at least ask for clarification on what was happening, but then she tapped the console on the wall at the front of the cell and dropped the barrier. The officer holding the Titan raised the weapon as he moved into a better position to keep the woman inside covered while the barrier was down. 

Taking a breath to steady herself Kelly stepped forward but Ed stopped her at the last second and held his hand out for the hypodermic. She should have seen that coming, the insistence that he take the risk instead of someone else. Kelly hesitated, trying to tell herself it had nothing to do with the fact that she was his ex-wife and by his own admission he still loved her, but as she looked into his eyes she saw something else there as well. 

Ed wanted to take the risk because he felt responsible for everything that had happened so far. If anyone was going to get hurt doing this he wanted it to be him. 

It was stupid and reckless and she shouldn’t have indulged it, not even for a second, but as she looked into his eyes she could feel her resolve evaporating and then before she knew what she was doing she was setting the hypodermic into his hand without a word. She glanced back at the security officer with the Titan, reassuring herself that he was in a good position to take action the second Rendell so much as twitched, and unconsciously she set her own hand on the PM-44 at her thigh where it now sat in a holster. 

Just before he stepped over the threshold into the cell Ed slipped the PM-44 from the identical holster at his own thigh and handed it to Kelly, almost as if in exchange for the medical equipment she had given him. She took it with a small frown and shifted the weapon in her grasp so that she could raise and fire it swiftly if the need arose. Taking the weapon into the cell with him was a risk he wasn’t going to take, she knew: if Rendell was waiting for an opportunity to seize a gun he wasn’t going to willingly walk one in there for her to grab. 

Kelly felt her heart pick up its pace as Ed stepped into the cell and approached the Lieutenant on the bed against the back wall. He was being careful not to step directly into the best line of sight for the security officer with the Titan, Kelly realised, but his position did compromise _her_ shot if she had to take one. She allowed herself a moment to feel frustrated by that, as well as concerned, before she switched her gaze to Rendell instead. She wanted to watch for the slightest twitch in the woman’s face, she wanted to be able to see the first signs of danger so she could shout a warning to Ed. 

It was only when Ed was stepping back out of the cell again that Kelly realised she had actually been holding her breath and it wasn’t until Talla reactivated the barrier that she felt she could relax again. Her shoulders dropped a little and she could feel the ache in them from how tightly she had been holding them, a dull discomfort that actually spread a little way down her back as well. 

Holding the hypodermic up as he spoke Ed said, “Let’s get this back to Doctor Finn.” 

Kelly suspected she was the only one who could hear the slight tremor in Ed’s voice, the last traces of the fear that had reared up inside of him as he’d stepped into that cell with Rendell. It shouldn’t have made her feel better, hearing that, but it did. Kelly couldn’t explain it. When it came to Ed she never could. 

She exchanged a glance with Talla before they turned and made their way out of the room, Kelly following Ed through the door and down the hall, coming up to walk at his side as they made their way through the ship again. With a shake of her head she said to him, “I keep thinking things can’t get any worse and then they do.” 

Ed looked her way, sighing as he did so. “You and me both,” he admitted. 

When she gave him a smile it was a soft and slightly sad expression, her heart wasn’t really in it and if she hadn’t been holding his weapon in her hand she might have reached up and touched his arm or his back to offer him some sort of extra comfort or reassurance. The First Officer had a lot of responsibilities but she saw supporting Ed in the emotional sense as vital a duty as anything else that fell under her purview. 

“Who knows,” she said to him then, trying to sound at least vaguely hopeful as they came up on a junction in the corridor, “maybe we’re past the worst of it.” 

Before Ed could respond something came out of nowhere to his right and slammed into him, hard and heavy and _fast_. It hit with enough force to smash Ed into Kelly, the impact throwing her against the wall. When she hit her body blazed with white hot pain and she gave a cry, hearing a shout of her name as she went down. The world went black before she hit the ground.

 

* * *

 

“ _Kelly_!” The wind had been knocked out of him but he had enough air in his lungs for that. Panic flashed through him as she dropped to the ground and dread followed in its wake when she stayed there but Ed didn’t have time to even so much as check her pulse. A shadow had loomed over him and told him to move and so that was what he did, throwing himself over in a roll that, while messy, carried him out of the way of whatever had made a grab for him. 

Not whatever, he realised when he raised his head, but _who_ ever. 

Klyden bore down on him with a ferocity Ed had never seen in the Moclan civilian and he reached for the holster at his thigh, remembering too late that he had already removed the weapon and handed it to Kelly. Just as he was searching the ground for it Klyden reached him and was pulling him to his feet by the front of his shirt, his grip so strong and so forceful that Ed barely even had a chance to fight. 

But he fought anyway, falling back on his Union training, knowing that it didn’t matter who it was in front of him if they meant him or any other member of his crew harm. Klyden definitely meant them harm and Ed had to stop him if he could. Without even bothering to try and wrestle his way free of the grip on his shirt he threw as heavy a punch as he could at the Moclan’s face. 

It was like hitting a punching bag without the protection of a glove and the shock of it reverberated all the way up Ed’s arm to his shoulder. Klyden didn’t even bat an eye but something in his expression darkened as he dropped his gaze to Ed’s other hand. As realisation dawned Ed tried to pull that arm, hypodermic and all, back out of the Moclan’s reach but Klyden was a lot faster than he looked. His hand closed around Ed’s wrist in an iron grip in the same instant as he swung them around swiftly and forcefully, propelling them towards the wall as he did so. 

Ed’s back hit the wall first and then his skull. Everything exploded in an agonising blanket of blinding stars and then there was nothing.


	9. Close Calls

Dann had been in the middle of spinning some wild and unfounded theory when Gordon lifted his hand and shushed him, ignoring the other Lieutenant’s wounded protests so he could strain his ears to listen. 

From up ahead and around the bend in the corridor he heard a shout. An impact. A cry of pain. 

Without a word to his companions Gordon took off running, feeling his heart skip a beat as his gut told him he recognised those voices. When he reached the bend he had enough sense to wish he had a weapon but he rounded it anyway with the sort of impulsiveness that had gotten him into trouble plenty of times in the past. More than he could count actually. 

He saw Klyden first, the Moclan the only one on his feet, and then his gaze lowered and he saw Kelly, down and seemingly out for the count. There was no way their First Officer would take any sort of attack lying down and from the looks of the scene there was no doubting that that was what it was. 

“ _Hey_!” Maybe shouting was a bad idea but beyond Kelly was Ed and he looked no better off than the Commander. Klyden was reaching for him when Gordon shouted, stopping mid-lunge and turning his head to consider the new arrivals. Dann and Ensign Turco had caught up with him by that point, the former stunned into silence with the latter gasping in shock or disbelief or a combination of both. Gordon rushed forward when he spotted something in the middle of the corridor that could give them the edge they would need against a Moclan. He didn’t even pause to see if his companions were hot on his heels or not. Right then it didn’t matter. At the sight of two of his closest friends in what looked like very real danger Gordon didn’t have time to think. 

Just as he reached the weapon, fully expecting Klyden to turn on _him_ as well, the Moclan snatched something from the ground close to Ed and then took off running down the adjacent hallway. Gordon raised the weapon just as he disappeared from sight and he thought about giving chase but one look at Kelly and then Ed gave him pause. Dann ran past him then and looked down the corridor, moving down it a couple of steps before he turned back with a shake of his head that said everything. 

Klyden was gone. 

Jenny dropped into sight, coming down close to Kelly and feeling the Commander’s neck for a pulse. Knowing that she was being looked after Gordon turned his attention to his best friend, able to see then that Ed wasn’t actually unconscious. He had to be on the verge though, from the looks of him, hunched down as close to the ground as he was, and as Gordon scrambled closer he heard the struggle in the other man’s breathing, the shuddering and hitched quality of it. 

“Dann, hey.” And that was all the warning he gave before he tossed the PM-44 to the other Lieutenant who, thankfully, caught it with only the smallest fumble and quickly assumed the role of lookout. 

Ed had one arm up, awkwardly cradled across the back of his head which was bowed so close to the ground his brow was basically against the carpet. “Ed?” Gordon set a hand on the other man’s back, gently at first and then more firmly when there was next to no reaction beyond another hitch in the already ragged breathing. 

“Commander? Commander, can you— _whoa_.” Gordon glanced back towards Jenny and their First Officer. Kelly had been coming around slowly, sluggishly, groaning softly, but when her eyes had opened abruptly the Ensign had started physically. “Take it easy, Commander, don’t move too fast.” 

Ed groaned then, a low and thick noise that Gordon didn’t like the sound of. 

“Oh, man.” The sound of Dann’s voice turned his head again, his hand never leaving Ed’s back, and when he saw that the other Lieutenant was looking at something on the wall above them Gordon glanced up. Dann’s reaction made sense then. There was a messy spattering of blood against the wall. Gordon dropped his eyes to Ed, more specifically that arm cradled across the back of the other man’s head. 

“Ed?” Gordon touched his other hand to that arm. “C’mon, man, let me just—” He saw the fresh red smear on the underside of his friend’s bare forearm then and as he managed to move the limb out of the way he saw the source. “Damn.” He glanced up at the blood on the wall and then back down at Ed. The back of his head must have cracked right against the join in the panels, from the looks of it. Gordon couldn’t tell how bad it was, Ed’s hair was so thick and dark it was difficult to see clearly, but he only had to lean a little closer to try and get a better look to see that there was some kind of wound there and it was oozing blood. His fingers came away from Ed’s head slick with it. “We gotta get them to sick bay,” he said to Jenny and Dann. “Right now.” 

Kelly was already sitting up by that point, grimacing and favouring one arm noticeably, but she looked conscious and alert enough to move mostly under her own power. Sure enough she started to get first to her knees and then her feet, Jenny sticking close and assisting her however she could, albeit a little gingerly. “Ed? Gordon, has he said anything?” Her voice was tight. She was in pain. 

Gordon shook his head and scanned Ed’s hunched frame, looking first at Dann and then down the corridor as he tried to gauge the distance to sick bay. It wasn’t too far. They could make it. “Okay, buddy,” he said, as much to himself as the other man, “work with me here.” And with that he took Ed’s arm and draped it around his shoulders. Even as Kelly told him to be careful he started to ease them up off the ground. Gordon tried not to think about the way his friend’s head lolled forward or how quiet he was, instead focusing on getting Ed all the way up and then gently turning them in the right direction. “Dann?” The other officer looked his way. “You first, man.” 

Dann got them underway, obviously hyper-aware and on the lookout for danger from the way his head turned this way and that, craning a little to look around the next corner as they reached it before he actually rounded it properly. Gordon followed with Ed, holding his friend’s arm around his shoulders with one hand. His other was braced around Ed’s back and supporting him at his side as best as possible. Kelly and Jenny brought up the rear, the younger woman staying close to the Commander, keeping her steady with her own hands. 

Ed was taller than him and heavier as well, so when he dipped suddenly towards the ground Gordon had no choice but to go with him or get dragged down anyway. He bit back half the curse that tried to spill out of his mouth and had to adjust his grip quickly to keep from dropping Ed altogether, glancing worriedly back at Kelly. Ed’s head had dropped forward again and his breathing had picked up speed, his back heaving with the effort. 

Kelly stepped closer. “He’s going to—” 

That was when Ed retched, suddenly and violently, his whole body lurching with the force of it. Had it been anyone else Gordon might have recoiled in disgust but Ed was his best friend. He wasn’t going anywhere. He kept his grip on the other man, loosening his arm around Ed’s back and ribs just in case that was making it worse. He set his hand between Ed’s shoulder blades instead as the other man vomited, looking back at Kelly, whose face was drawn in very real and very obvious concern. 

With a shake of his head Gordon looked down the hallway ahead. They had made it about a quarter of the way, give or take. It didn’t take a genius to figure out Ed wouldn’t be able to make it the rest of the way under his own power. He looked back at the women standing not far behind where he and Ed were dropped in the middle of the corridor. “Jenny? Call Doctor Finn.” They needed help, and fast. 

 

* * *

 

“Ensign Turco to Doctor Finn.” 

The sound of the voice as it came through her comm was urgent enough that Claire immediately set the pad down on the closest surface so she could respond. “Doctor Finn here.” 

“We need you on Deck D immediately. We have an emergency.” 

 _Another_ one? Claire’s stomach dropped and she didn’t waste any time asking for details, simply saying instead, “I’m on my way,” before she rallied a few of her team and got them moving. She led the way through the ship at as rapid a pace as they could maintain sensibly, her mind racing, imagining all sorts of possibilities for what they might find when they reached their destination. 

The last thing she expected was what awaited them when they rounded the last corner between them and the promised emergency. It was only her wealth of training and experience that kept her from faltering at the sight of the group ahead. Moving forward without hesitation at the head of her small team she assessed the gathering, taking in as many facts as she could at a glance in order to decide who it was that needed her the most. Kelly had given her a shake of her head as she had approached to discount herself but as it was Claire had already ascertained that the Commander wasn’t the most urgent case. 

Captain Mercer was on the ground with Lieutenant Malloy close by his side. The Lieutenant had managed to get the Captain to sit against the wall, albeit somewhat awkwardly, and as she lowered to her knees close to them the Helmsman nodded a little down the corridor as he said, “He threw up.” Claire followed the man’s gaze and saw the mess and then she returned her attention to the Captain as Lieutenant Malloy went on to add, “And he’s bleeding. Here.” As gently as possible he eased the Captain’s head forward from where it had been resting against the wall, the Helmsman’s jacket cushioned between the two, eliciting only the smallest of responses from the man in the shape of a low groan. “I’ve been trying to keep him awake, but—” The Lieutenant sounded at a loss, and obviously worried too, shaking his head even as Claire got as good a look as possible at the wound that had left the Captain in this condition. 

“All right,” she said, turning to two of her team. “We need a stretcher down here, right now.” There was no way the Captain could walk and she wasn’t going to risk anyone trying to carry him. As the pair hurried off she turned her eyes back to Gordon, giving him a nod. In that instant there was something about the man’s expression that reminded her so much of her kids. She couldn’t not say something to reassure him. “You did the right thing, Lieutenant.” 

Gordon hesitated, his gaze flicking from the Captain to her face and back again before he could give her a nod in return. When he spoke again it was in a quieter voice and obviously directed at the Captain, most of it meaningless chatter to try and keep the other man conscious. Claire could have told him that there was no need, that ultimately there was no benefit to keeping Captain Mercer conscious, but it was doing neither man any real harm either and so she didn’t have the heart to interfere in what was obviously just as much a soothing gesture for the Lieutenant as it was the wounded party. 

It was as she was checking the readings on her medscanner that Lieutenant Keyali joined the gathering with a few of her people, taking a look at the assortment of officers in various states before she set her gaze on Claire. “What happened? We didn’t exactly get any details.” 

Claire shook her head, not looking up from the readings on her scanner. “I only just got here myself, Lieutenant.” 

Obviously needing some way to busy himself with everything that was going on it was Dann who spoke up and there was no mistaking the disbelief in his voice as he said, “It was _Klyden_.” Claire glanced in his direction, struggling for a moment to believe that she had heard that right, and it was only then that she noticed the Lieutenant was holding a weapon. 

“Klyden,” the Xelayan repeated, but if she was thrown by the announcement she did a damned good job of masking it. That was part of what made her a good Chief of Security though, Claire knew. Lieutenant Keyali was always cool in a crisis. “Really?” 

“Really,” Lieutenant Malloy confirmed from his place down at Captain Mercer’s side, easing the other man’s head back against that makeshift cushion, apologising under his breath when he prompted a small groan of what sounded like discomfort but Claire knew it likely didn’t have much real meaning behind it. The Captain was far from aware at that point. “We heard something, like a fight, and when we came around the corner there he was. He was reaching for Ed but we must’ve spooked him so he just grabbed something off the floor and ran.” 

“I didn’t see where he went.” Dann sounded sorry for that. Ensign Turco was close by him and set a hand on his arm without saying a word. 

“It was the hypodermic,” Commander Grayson told them all. When Claire lifted her head their eyes met. “That has to be what he took.” She looked around at the group they had found her with upon their arrival. “Unless anyone found one in the corridor?” All three of them shook their heads. The Commander’s expression darkened. “Sorry, Doctor,” she said soberly. “We’ll have to get another sample.” 

“You think that’s all he was after?” Lieutenant Malloy was frowning, shaking his head, never completely taking his hands from the Captain in order to keep him supported. “If you could just get another sample of whatever it was then why go to all that trouble?” 

Before anyone could so much as hypothesise the motives of the Moclan attacker the pair that Claire had sent off for the stretcher returned. “This will have to wait,” she told all those gathered, waving the two members of her team forward. “We need to get the Captain to sick bay. You too, Commander.” Claire wasn’t taking any chances with either one of them at this rate. 

 

* * *

 

Talla and her team had headed off to try and track down Klyden but only after escorting the rather large gathering to sick bay. Kelly had dismissed Lieutenant Dann and Ensign Turco once they got there, though she had done so with a great deal of gratitude, despite the pain she had been feeling. There was no telling what might have happened if they hadn’t come along when they did. Gordon, however, she had permitted to stay, if only because one look at him was all it took to figure out what he wasn’t going anywhere until he knew everyone was okay. It helped with the pain a little, knowing that he cared so much, that he was so concerned for their wellbeing that he wouldn’t be removed. 

“How’s that, Commander?” Nurse Park had just finished his work and was looking at her expectantly. 

Experimentally she moved the arm in question, lifting and lowering the shoulder carefully before giving it a full roll. With a small sigh she said, “Much better. Thanks.” With a nod and a smile he moved off, letting her slide off the bed she had been sitting on so she could move the short distance to where Claire was working on Ed. 

Gordon looked up as she joined them. “You good?” He had given her a once-over but he wanted to hear it in her own words, obviously. 

With a nod she said, “It was just dislocated. It’s fine now.” Amazingly there had been no other damage after being slammed into the wall, not even after hitting her head. She had to assume that was what had happened anyway, given the fact that she had blacked out. 

That was nothing compared to Ed though, she had been able to tell that much with a single glance, and she looked from his pale face to their Chief Medical Officer, wanting to ask about his progress but not wanting to interrupt. Claire’s features were knitted in concentration and she was quiet as she worked. They had laid Ed on his side so they could work on the injury without making him too uncomfortable but Kelly knew he had blacked out completely before they had even finished loading him onto the stretcher down on Deck D. She hadn’t seen the damage but she had known that it was bad from his reaction. For Ed to fall completely silent save for the occasional groan was a troubling sign, and that was to say nothing of the vomiting. 

Even before Claire spoke Kelly suspected she knew what had happened. 

“He’s out of the woods now,” the Doctor said, setting her equipment aside at last and bowing a little to carefully move the hair at the back of Ed’s head this way and that, checking the skin underneath. “It was a pretty severe concussion,” she went on, looking up to Kelly and then back down one last time before she straightened, obviously satisfied. “But given it was Klyden who did the damage? He’s lucky it wasn’t even worse than that.” 

Gordon’s eyes widened a little. “ _Worse_?” 

“Yes,” Claire confirmed. “Klyden could have easily caved Captain Mercer’s skull in completely if he had put his mind to it.” 

Their Helmsman went quiet, and a little pale Kelly noticed, looking down at the man on the bed. 

With a shake of her head Kelly said, “I don’t think he was trying to kill us.” When the other two officers looked her way she went on, “If he had wanted to kill us why not just shoot us? He got the drop on us easily enough, we never would have seen it coming.” After a moment she added, “And Ed wasn’t even armed. I was carrying his weapon.” Klyden only would have had to take one look at them to recognise as much and he could have taken the time to shoot her first and then Ed. 

Kelly allowed herself a moment to feel unsettled by that thought, just how easy it would have been for the Moclan, and then she looked down at the man between them. Without even thinking about what she was doing she lifted one hand and touched it to his arm, her thumb briefly stroking back and forth over his skin. 

“But why would Klyden attack you guys at all?” Gordon’s face showed his confusion without any reservation. “I know you said he took the hypodermic but _why_ would he take it? What good is it to him?” 

“This has to have something to do with what you found in the blood,” Kelly said to Claire and the other woman was already nodding before she had even finished speaking. 

“And that means there _was_ something in Rendell’s blood.” The Doctor looked between the two of them. “There must have been. Otherwise why take it?” 

That feeling of disquiet Kelly had been feeling hadn’t abated and she looked down at Ed again. She took a few moments to reassure herself by watching the steady rhythm of his breathing, much more stable now that the damage had been repaired. “That means this is much more serious than we originally thought,” she heard herself say, not even realising she was going to speak before it was happening. When she lifted her gaze the other two officers were already watching her, waiting for the rest of her train of thought. She didn’t keep them waiting long. “Whatever this is it’s spreading and we have no way of knowing just how many people are infected.” 

Gordon swallowed, his throat obviously dry, and when he spoke it was quietly and a little fearfully that he did so. “Or _who_.” 

“And just to make matters worse,” Claire added gravely, “they’re obviously working together.” 

Kelly bit back a sigh, her own voice quiet now and a little distant as she asked no one in particular, “But to what end?”


	10. Plans

His head was _pounding_. That was the first thing he noticed. 

It was the only thing he was capable of noticing for a while, it was so intense and so overwhelming that it almost chased him right back into oblivion. Ed almost wished for that but instead he pushed past it enough to feel something else instead: his hand. More specifically he could feel another hand on top of his own. The longer he concentrated on it, or _tried_ to concentrate on it, the more aware of it he became. That hand was not just laid atop his own but positioned in such a way as to be holding it and every now and then their thumb would move back and forth, a soft stroking motion, soothing and gentle. 

 _Kelly_. 

When he managed to open his eyes, only a fraction at first, his vision was blurred and unsteady but he could make out enough to be sure that it was her. He didn’t even need the blue of the uniform jacket to confirm his suspicions. He just knew. 

When he groaned it was unwittingly that he did so, a result of opening his eyes and trying to focus his vision. It caught Kelly’s attention, at least enough that she said his name. Or he thought she said his name. He couldn’t be sure. His vision wasn’t the only thing that was unsteady. 

“Hey.” She was closer now, one hand still holding his own with her other coming to rest gently first against his shoulder and then touching briefly to his face. “Ed, it’s me. Can you hear me?” She said something else as well but he didn’t hear that part, she moved further away and he lost the sound of her voice. 

This time when he groaned it was a conscious decision, he was hoping it would make him feel at least a little better to let the sound out, and maybe some of the pounding and other general discomfort along with it. Something told him it wasn’t going to be that easy. “Kel?” His voice felt thick, sluggish, and there was a bad taste in his mouth that he wanted to get rid of as quickly as possible but he didn’t have enough saliva to try and swallow it away. Bad was an understatement, actually. 

“I’m here, Ed.” Kelly gave his hand the slightest squeeze. “I’m okay.” Good. He had wanted to ask but the words wouldn’t form. 

“Captain?” This time when he opened his eyes and tried to focus it wasn’t Kelly that he could see but Doctor Finn. “Try to keep your eyes open for me. That’s it.” He thought she might have given him a smile but he wasn’t convinced he hadn’t imagined it. “How are you feeling?” 

Instead of answering that question Ed tried to move instead. All of a sudden all he could think about was how uncomfortable he was, and that awful _taste_. He wanted it gone but that would mean getting something to drink and he couldn’t very well do that lying down. It was with yet another groan that he started trying to push himself up, more than a little shakily at first, almost instantly regretting it when the pounding in his skull took a dramatic leap in the wrong direction. 

“Whoa, hey, take it easy.” Doctor Finn again. He felt her hand on him but he didn’t relent, using what little strength he could muster to keep from being pushed back down again. Shaking his head was a mistake he regretted instantly, pain and nausea surging up violently as soon as he did so, but Claire seemed to get the message at least and he thought he heard her give a sigh. “All right. All right, just—” Another small sigh and a pause in which he imagined she looked towards Kelly. “Just take it slow. Your skull took one hell of a knock.” 

“Yeah,” he managed, little more than a groan in and of itself. He had meant to follow it up with something along the lines of _You’re telling me_ but he couldn’t form the words just yet. Instead he had to focus all of his attention on pushing his free hand against the bed, realising only when he was almost all the way up that someone was helping him. Before he even opened his eyes and traced that arm back to its owner he knew it was Kelly. She gave him a slight smile when their eyes met but her gaze was searching and concerned. She was trying to figure out how he was feeling and just how badly he was hurting. He knew that look. 

Doctor Finn still had one hand on him as well and the two women stayed where they were for a few moments until they were sure he wasn’t going to buckle over, or right off the bed onto the floor. When Claire stepped away Kelly stayed where she was. Ed realised she was still holding his hand. He raised his other and touched it tentatively to his head, grimacing before he even finished the motion. He half-expected his hand to come away bloody but even though his hair back there felt dirty and clumped together there was nothing of the sort. 

“Ed?” That was Gordon’s voice and it came from off to the side but he didn’t even dare to look in that direction. Sure enough the Helmsman appeared in his line of sight within a few moments and he could focus his vision enough to see that the other man’s smile was one of relief. “Oh, man, you scared the crap outta me, you know that?” 

“Me too.” His voice sounded rough as well as feeling it and he pulled a face, trying to swallow away the dryness and the bad taste that he was recognising more and more as time passed. 

“Hey, Gordon? Can you grab some water?” 

“Oh, sure thing, Commander.” 

Ed didn’t know how long Gordon was gone for but he could hear the quiet workings of a medscanner in that time. In order to confirm his suspicion that Doctor Finn was standing behind him running her scans he would have had to turn his head in a way he just didn’t trust himself to pull off without making things so much worse. Instead he concentrated on taking deep breaths and focusing his vision enough to make out Kelly’s face as she stood in front of him. 

“Here.” Gordon was back and he had a tall silver cup in his hand, offering it out as he reached the bed. Before Ed could lift his free hand to take it Kelly did the honours and it was only when she lifted it for him that he noticed it had a lid and a straw, exactly like the ones John used to bring to the bridge during his shifts. Thinking about their Chief Engineer almost had Ed looking around for the other man but he managed to stop himself. With Kelly’s help he took several long pulls from the cup, beyond grateful for the coolness of the water as it washed down his throat. She kept him from drinking too much but she held the cup close by for when he wanted more. 

Gordon looked past Ed to the woman standing behind him. “How’s he doin’, Doc’?” 

Claire was obviously done with her scans by that point and she came around the bed again so that Ed could see her. His vision was clear enough now that he could make out her face without struggling too much. “I repaired the damage but you’re going to be feeling a little rough for the next hour or so. I don’t want you wandering off until you’re back to normal, okay?” When Ed gave the barest of nods she gave him a small smile. “I’ll give you something for the pain as well. It’ll subside on its own but I’ll help it along for you.” 

Ed was just as grateful for that news as he had been for the drink of water. “Thanks, Claire.” With a frown he said, “I didn’t imagine that, did I? That was really Klyden back there?” Part of him was wishing he had, that this whole crazy mission had been some kind of bad dream he was just waking up from. 

“Yeah,” Gordon confirmed, nodding his head. “Talla and her team are out looking for him now. No luck, last I heard.” 

Kelly was leaning against the bed close by Ed’s side. She still hadn’t released his hand. He was glad for that. “He took the blood sample,” she told him and Ed wasn’t surprised. As he’d been sitting there trying to collect himself the memory of the brief fight in the corridor had come back to him piece by piece. 

“I tried to stop him.” 

“He nearly caved in your skull, man,” Gordon said, sounding alarmed. “I’d say you did everything you could.” 

Ed wanted to offer his friend a smile but he couldn’t manage it. Instead he stayed quiet for a few minutes, letting Doctor Finn go through the process of administering the promised pain relief and run a few more routine checks on him before he said anything else. “We need a plan.” 

From his side Kelly said, “My thoughts exactly.” From the sound of her voice she was just as frustrated by all of this as he was, if not more so. She wanted to take action and get to the bottom of whatever was going on aboard their ship. When he turned his head and met her gaze he saw the conviction there, the drive and determination that they were both going to need if they were going to fix this. 

“There’s just one problem.” Gordon’s voice had dropped in volume, becoming conspiratorial as he looked between the faces of those gathered. Ed frowned again. Obviously he had missed something while he was unconscious. “We need a plan, sure, but who can we trust _with_ the plan? We have no idea who’s infected.” 

Ed glanced at Kelly. He had definitely missed something. 

“Then we keep this simple.” Kelly sounded composed and confident. “Until we know if we _can_ trust anyone else we keep it between us.” 

“Just us?” Gordon made a circular motion with his finger, indicating the four of them in doing so. 

Kelly nodded resolutely. “Just us.” 

Ed had stayed quiet during the small exchange, putting the pieces together as much as he could in that time. It didn’t exactly make for a particularly appealing picture but they would have to work with what they had. It was something they were growing increasingly accustomed to and as Halsey had told him during their last call they were on their own out here, for all intents and purposes. What else could they do? “All right,” he said after drawing in a deep and hopefully steadying breath, his free hand gripping the edge of the bed. “Fill me in.” If he was going to help with this plan then he needed all the facts, and fast. If this infection was spreading then they were running out of time. 

 

* * *

 

An hour had passed. Claire flicked off the light and lowered it from the Captain’s face after checking his pupillary response, giving a nod to show that she was satisfied even as she said, “Everything looks back to normal.” The Captain was blinking to clear the light from his vision but he nodded as well, another good sign considering he did so without any show of discomfort. 

Over the last hour they had gone back and forth over their next course of action, each of them offering what little insight they could and presenting alternatives whenever they hit a roadblock of some sort. Despite his recent injury Captain Mercer had been able to join in on the process well enough and Claire had kept an eye on him the entire time, only ducking out for the briefest of intervals in order to check on her team and their patients. As much as possible they kept their discussion between the four of them and the rest of her staff figured out to keep their distance by the hushed voices and the grave, focused expressions on their faces. Still, Claire kept her eye on them as much as she could. Just in case. There really was no telling how far this had gone. 

With the Captain’s condition significantly improved they moved their conversation into her office. This time Commander Grayson insisted the Captain take a seat but instead of being on the couch at the back of the room he took one of the chairs in front of the desk. Kelly took the other when Lieutenant Malloy waved her to it, opting to stand between the two of them facing Claire. 

“Do we really think this is going to work the way we want it to?” It was the Lieutenant who asked. “What if they figure out we’re up to something?” 

“Then they figure it out,” Commander Grayson said, looking back at him. “If it doesn’t work then we go to Plan B.” 

“Whatever that is,” the Captain cut in, and gave a small shake of his head. “At this point we’re kind of grasping at straws, but it’s this or nothing.” After glancing back at their Helmsman as well he added, “And I’d say this has a decent shot of paying off.” 

Claire had been nodding her head slowly as the others went back and forth, watching the three of them and the expressions of uncertainty on their faces. There was a healthy amount of determination in their expressions as well and she thought back over the time they had all spent on the _Orville_ together so far. They had all been new to the ship when Captain Mercer took command and they had been through a lot together and also as individuals. Claire had faith in each and every one of them. “The sooner we put this plan into motion the sooner we’ll know, one way or the other,” she pointed out and the Captain lifted his brows at that, tilting his head in a conceding motion as he glanced to his First Officer. Lieutenant Malloy drew in a deep breath before nodding his head. 

“All right then,” Captain Mercer said, turning his gaze back to Claire, his mind obviously made up. “Let’s get this show on the road.” 

 

* * *

 

God, he was nervous. Stupidly nervous actually. He kept trying to tell himself that his hands weren’t shaking and that his heart wasn’t going a mile a minute but every time he convinced himself of one the other kicked back into high gear and he was right back where he started. Gordon might have been annoyed about that if he wasn’t so anxious about screwing up somehow. 

Ed and Kelly had been the best bets to get the ball rolling on spreading the word. They had left sick bay together with the promise to _stick_ together but wherever they went they would be sure to make some mention of a successful recovery of a replacement blood sample for the one that had been lost in the corridor following Klyden’s attack. Gordon was glad it was on them to pull that off. If they had learned nothing else from his and Ed’s time on the Krill ship it was that Gordon Malloy was not great at improvisation. His attempts at the simulations for the command tests spoke for themselves as well. As nervous as he was about his part in all of this he was much better suited to the task he had been assigned. 

That didn’t make that task any less nerve-wracking. They had no idea who, if anyone, would walk through that door. They couldn’t act too quickly and blow the whole operation but they couldn’t leave it too late before taking action either. It was a delicate balance, a fine line, and no sooner had that thought crossed his mind than Gordon realised his palms had actually started to _sweat_. 

Just as he was wondering how much time had actually passed and hoping this whole thing would be over soon he heard the sick bay doors open. From his hiding place he could just make out the sound but he didn’t dare move to check. He just took in a deep breath, as steady as he could manage, and held it, hunkering down just that little bit more as he waited. 

He didn’t have to wait long. There was a short sequence of beeps and then another hiss, this time much closer, as the door to Doctor Finn’s office opened. The lights didn’t spring on as they normally would have and for a moment whoever it was in the doorway hesitated before deciding they didn’t need them after all. There was enough light coming through the windows at the side and rear of the office to see by. 

Still hunkered down in place Gordon kept his breath held and continued to wait, listening to the sound of footsteps against the carpet as the figure moved across the office towards the desk. When they moved into the right position for Gordon to make them out in the mirror on the wall nearby he felt his heart skip a little as he recognised their outline, the broad shoulders and bald, ridged skull. Gordon actually had to bite his bottom lip to keep from uttering any sound, remembering very clearly what Doctor Finn had said about just how easily the Moclan could have killed the Captain if he had wanted to. 

He just had to wait for his opening. 

The Moclan was just _so close_ to him now. It was impossible not to feel at least a little fear. Actually maybe terror was a better word. 

Klyden started to rummage and root through the items Doctor Finn had strategically left scattered around her desk. The various cases and other containers she had set there were enough to keep the Moclan occupied for a good couple of minutes and Gordon was able to make out the sounds of increasing frustration. Each new container was opened and closed with more haste and irritation than the last and it was only a matter of time before one was knocked all the way off the desk. It was sheer luck and nothing more that kept it from hitting Gordon on the way down. As Klyden made more noise he was able to shift in his position and watch as the door opened again, the Moclan’s agitated hunting loud enough by now that he didn’t hear that. 

What he _would_ hear though was someone coming up behind him. 

Go time. 

Managing to do so without cracking his head on the way up Gordon sprung to his feet from behind the desk and held up a hand in greeting. “Hey, Klyden. Fancy seeing you here!” He managed to sound convincingly jovial, he thought, and he even showed a fairly genuine smile, actually amused by the way the Moclan’s eyes widened the way they did. “Looking for something?” he asked, keeping Klyden’s attention on him even as the Moclan tensed to move. “Maybe I can help you find it? What is it?” Gordon actually reached for one of the boxes on the desk. 

It had the desired effect. Klyden lunged for the exact same box with a low growl of a sound in the base of his throat. Reflexively Gordon snatched it and jumped back. Klyden kept coming, actually shoving _into_ the desk and shunting the whole thing across the floor in the process. Gordon had just enough time to imagine how much it would hurt to be pinned between the wall and that desk before Doctor Finn sprang into action. 

From right behind the Moclan she reached up and pressed a hypodermic to the side of his neck, triggering the release of its contents with the simple press of a button. Klyden had just enough time to realise he had been played and then he was dropping to the ground like so much dead weight. He took out one of the chairs on the other side of the desk on the way down, buckling the thing under his weight. 

“Holy _crap_.” Gordon remembered how to breathe then, still clutching the box to his chest even though it contained nothing more precious than some of the Doctor’s kids’ old toys. Another decoy, along with every other container on the desk. They were scattered everywhere now, several of them littering the ground, their contents spilled out across the carpet. 

Doctor Finn let out a rush of breath as well, lifting her gaze from the crumpled Moclan to meet Gordon’s eyes across her messy and crooked desk. “I’ll say.” Setting the empty hypodermic down on the desk she tapped her comm. “Doctor Finn to Captain Mercer. Can I see you in my office, please?” She turned her attention back to Gordon and gave him a smile that he could only describe as sly. Amazingly, it actually made him feel better. “I believe I have something for you.”


	11. Revelations

“My God.” Doctor Finn was standing close to the large vertical wall screen that was currently showing a full body scan of the Moclan secured to the central examination bed. “Would you look at that?” She wasn’t really addressing any of them directly, Ed recognised that much, but he still moved closer to her in order to get a better look at the screen. 

Sure enough the screen showed Klyden’s body, inside and out, but Ed would be the first to admit that his specialty had never been biology or anything else related to medicine in general. With a glance to Kelly on Doctor Finn’s other side and then one to Gordon, who had come to stand on his left, he finally asked, “What are we looking at, Doctor?” 

With a tap of a couple of choice keys their Doctor had revolved the scan and zoomed in on it, specifically the Moclan’s skull and neck. Before it was pointed out Ed saw it, what looked to his untrained eye like an imperfection or even an error in the reading but he knew it could be nothing of the sort. 

“What _is_ that?” Obviously Kelly had seen it too. 

Gordon leaned a little closer, peering past Ed to get a better look, but for the time being he remained quiet. 

Doctor Finn indicated the part of the screen Ed had homed in on and made a circular motion with her finger. “This right here? It’s a foreign body. _Literally_.” She looked around at the three of them and then tapped a couple of other commands on the workstation. It zoomed in even further, giving the four of them an enhanced and up close and personal look of whatever it was that was wreaking havoc on the _Orville_. 

“Is that—” Gordon’s words trailed off and out of the corner of his eye Ed saw the Helmsman’s features shift into a grimace. “ _Jesus_.” 

“It’s a _parasite_.” Doctor Finn turned her head to look at Ed specifically. “How it got there I couldn’t tell you, but what I _can_ tell you is that it’s latched on tight. You see here?” She tilted the view again and sure enough Ed could see that the creature’s appendages were wound intricately around what looked like the uppermost portion of the Moclan’s spine. “It’s worked its way into his cerebral cortex and wound itself around his spinal column.” 

“Can you remove it?” Kelly was shaking her head, obviously in disbelief at what they were seeing.

With a sigh Doctor Finn said, “Not without considerable risk. I don’t know how the parasite would react to that kind of attack, and let’s make no mistake, that is exactly how it would perceive any attempts I made to remove it.” 

“It could kill him.” Ed knew no one needed him to say that but he wanted all facts on the table anyway. Their Chief Medical Officer nodded in confirmation. He narrowed his eyes, still studying the scan and the creature that had worked its way inside one of their civilian passengers. “What does this have to do with the comatose crewmembers?” 

“Ed?” Kelly was watching him, frowning uncertainly. 

“You said you found foreign tissue in their systems.” He took his gaze from the screen then and looked down into Doctor Finn’s eyes. He saw the dawning of realisation there and she held up a hand before she went back to the screen. 

For several moments she worked wordlessly, calling across results and comparing files, and they all watched her without interruption. When the woman lowered her arms and let out a breath Ed suspected he knew what she was going to say. “I don’t believe it.” She turned to look at him. “It’s a _match_.” 

“Wait.” Gordon considered them all in turn and then pointed at the screen and the results displayed there. “So you’re saying these things are in all the people who are stuck in comas? There’s one of those things in John?” 

“Not anymore,” Doctor Finn clarified, the energy in her voice picking up now that she had something real to work with. “There _was_ a creature there but for some reason it didn’t survive and what we see here—” she gestured to their Chief Engineer’s results, “—is what’s left of it. It started to break down at such an accelerated rate that there was nothing significant left for me to find in my scans. That’s why I didn’t know what we were dealing with until now.” 

“But why would it be intact in Klyden and not John? Or the others?” Kelly had looked back at the unmoving figures occupying the beds around them. “We know it’s got nothing to do with their species. Rendell obviously has one of these things inside of her as well.” 

“That or she just went nuts,” Gordon interjected, shrugging his shoulders. 

“But then why would Klyden have stolen her blood sample?” Kelly and Gordon exchanged a look and the Helmsman conceded with a tilt of his head. “So what is it about Klyden and Rendell that those like John don’t have?” 

Ed had been staring at the screen but something occurred to him then and he turned to Doctor Finn. “Did you ever get a chance to compile those lists I asked for?” 

“Oh.” Doctor Finn stepped away for a moment, ducking into her office and returning with a pad, handing it to him. “Sorry, Captain. With everything going on with our crew—” 

“It’s okay.” Ed took a moment to give the Doctor a small smile and then turned his attention down to the pad, scrolling through the manifest and the causes of death. When he lifted his gaze he met Kelly’s eye first and foremost. 

“What is it?” 

Ed took it upon himself to hijack part of the wall screen then, transmitting the information on the pad so that everyone could see it. “Look at this.” He indicated the column on the left. “These are the people who died of natural causes: starvation, thirst, things like that. Look at their job titles.” 

Gordon was peering up at it. “Microbiologist, Lab Assistant, Data Analyst, another Lab Assistant, Relief Technician. _Janitor_?” 

“Now look at these ones.” Ed indicated the column on the right, the list of those who had died by other means. 

It was Kelly who read those positions aloud. “Security, Security, Chief Engineer, Chief of Security, First Officer.” 

Ed indicated the last name on the list. “And the man we found in isolation.” 

Kelly took her eyes from the screen and met his gaze, her voice grave as she spoke. “Captain.” 

From Ed’s left Gordon cursed quietly under his breath. “I’d say that’s a pattern.” He looked up at Ed and then across at Doctor Finn. “So what do we do?” 

The older woman shook her head. “We still have no way of knowing who in the crew is infected, which presents a problem.” 

“I’ll say.” Kelly sounded frustrated, if only for a moment. She had collected herself by the time she went on, “Is there any way we can perform a ship wide scan for these parasites?” 

Doctor Finn shook her head again. “Not from here. It could be done on a case-by-case basis with the comscanners but ship wide?” With a glance across to one bed in particular she said, “There are probably only two people on board who would be able to programme a scan like that.” 

Ed didn’t need to follow her gaze to know who she was looking at. “John,” he said. 

“And Isaac,” Kelly concluded. “Well, that explains what happened to him.” 

“Not exactly,” Ed corrected. “It explains why we can’t find him, but it doesn’t tell us what happened.” Kelly tipped her head a little to acknowledge his point. As Ed looked at her he could tell she was clenching her jaw a little, her frustration building. She wouldn’t let it out here, not in a setting or situation like this, but she would need a drink or an opportunity to let it all off her chest. Preferably both. 

“But why not just get rid of John?” Gordon asked, frowning. “I mean if he was a threat, why didn’t they just—” He cut himself off then, obviously not wanting to mention the possibility that their Chief Engineer could have just been murdered instead of rendered comatose. 

“They tried to infect him,” Doctor Finn said, looking back at Klyden where he lay secured to the bed behind them. “But for some reason it didn’t work.” She stepped closer to the Moclan. “My guess would be that when the parasite breaks down it releases a toxin into the bloodstream and that’s what causes the comas. I didn’t detect anything like that in my scans but it could be such minute levels that it didn’t show up.” 

“Can you confirm that?” 

She looked back at Ed and nodded. “I’ll run another round of tests now that I know exactly what I’m looking for.” She was beside the Moclan then and Ed stepped closer as well, noting that Kelly and Gordon followed suit until they were standing around Klyden, essentially surrounding him. “There’s something else as well, Captain.” 

Ed looked her way, taking his eyes from the Moclan’s face. “What is it?” 

“Now that I know what we’re dealing with I can try and develop some sort of—” Her eyes narrowed as she searched for the right word. “Not a vaccination exactly, but some sort of guard.” 

Gordon’s brows lifted a little. “To keep the uninfected crew from getting infected?” 

“Well, maybe not all of them. I might not have time to develop that much. But I should be able to prepare enough for us at least.” 

Kelly had been quiet since they had moved over to the bed and when she spoke she sounded troubled. “We have no way of knowing who we can trust,” she said, looking to Ed primarily. “We don’t know how long it takes to infect one person, let alone a hundred. For all we know more than half the crew have these things inside them and short of scanning each one of them individually we have no means of identification.” 

Biting back a sigh Ed shook his head, conceding to his First Officer’s points without having to say as much. “We’re definitely at a disadvantage here.” Those were words he didn’t like saying out loud but it would have been stupid to claim anything else. 

“And, I mean,” Gordon began, a little uncertainly at first but with building conviction as he went on, “do we even know how they do it? How they infect you? They obviously have to catch you alone, right? So what do we do about that?” 

“None of us can be alone right now,” Kelly said, looking around the group, her gaze landing on Ed finally for his approval and he nodded without hesitation. She was right. If any of them were caught alone the infection could spread and take them down with it. “Claire, how long will it take for you to manufacture that protection you were talking about?” 

Doctor Finn let out a long breath. “I’ll need to examine the parasite a little more closely but now that we have a living sample right here? A couple of hours, hopefully?” 

Kelly nodded and looked to Ed. “A couple of hours,” she echoed. “I think the four of us can watch each other’s backs that long.” 

“But what do they _want_?” Gordon was looking at Klyden more than a little warily as he leaned a fraction closer. He didn’t stay there for long, leaning back again. “They’re just spreading for the hell of it, or what?” 

Ed had been watching Klyden’s face as well and he didn’t look up even as he started to speak, “They want what all lifeforms want: they want to branch out and procreate. You said it yourself, Gordon: they want to _spread_.” 

The Helmsman’s voice was quieter when he added with building understanding, “And they can’t do it without a ship.” 

“And they can’t work a ship without its crew.” Ed did lift his gaze then, looking to Kelly even as she spoke. 

“And they can’t work a crew,” she said, her words heavy, “without its Captain.” 

 

* * *

 

“Bortus to Mercer.” 

Kelly looked across the desk at Ed as he hesitated and then tapped the comm on the Doctor’s keypad in front of him. “Mercer here.” 

“Captain, it is almost eighteen-hundred hours. Is everything all right?” 

It had been a while since they had checked in with the bridge. Kelly wanted to be reassured, maybe even a little touched by the Moclan Second Officer reaching out like that but with their recent discoveries and all the uncertainties that went along with it she found she couldn’t draw much of anything from it. Suspicion, perhaps, and with a sigh she looked back down at the pad in her hand. 

“Everything’s fine, Bortus,” Ed responded, doing a good job of keeping his voice level and calm. Kelly smiled to herself, just for a moment. That ability must have served him well on the Krill ship when he and Gordon had gone undercover, she was sure. It was just one of the many things that made him a good captain, as she had always known he would be. “How are things up there?” 

“There have been no changes to report, Captain.” 

“All right.” Ed glanced across the desk at Kelly. “Keep holding down the fort. Mercer out.” And with that he tapped the comm, sitting there in silence for a couple of moments before he leaned back in the chair and sighed. 

“You’re hating this.” It was a useless statement, one she didn’t need to make, but Kelly wanted to talk it through with him anyway and this was as good a place to start as any. 

“Of course I am,” he said. He sounded tired again. Kelly was almost sorry she had started the conversation but it needed to be worked through. They both knew that nothing helped more than talking things out. She was the one who was always saying how much it would have helped their marriage, after all. “I don’t even know if I can trust my own crew,” he went on, shaking his head. “And now I’m hiding away from them? How can I _not_ hate that?” 

“You’re not hiding, Ed,” she told him, putting the pad down, forgetting all about it for the time being. “You’re doing this for them, you know that.” She gestured to the window, meaning to indicate Klyden, or more specifically the creature using him like a giant puppet. “If one of those things gets a hold of you then there’s no telling how much damage they could do. For all we know when they get inside someone they have access to everything.” She held his gaze and repeated, with extra weight, “ _Everything_.” 

Ed leaned forward in the chair again, resting his elbows on the surface of Claire’s desk and briefly holding his head in his hands. “Command codes, emergency procedures, Union directives—” 

“Every single classified piece of information, _powerful_ information, you have access to.” It was a sobering thought, a deeply alarming one, and as Ed lifted his head the real gravity of it was obviously dawning on him as well. If Kelly didn’t know better she would say he looked a little paler all of a sudden. 

“There’s one thing I don’t understand, Kel,” he said to her and she furrowed her brow to show she was listening, and to prompt him to continue. “If they want to spread they don’t really need me to move this ship.” 

“No,” she conceded, “but there are probably just enough uninfected crew members left to challenge any unauthorised decision like that. All you would have to do is challenge any orders given to change course and that plan goes out the window.” With a shrug of her shoulders she said, “For all we know Bortus is fine. If that’s the case then he’s not about to let anyone move the ship without your go-ahead.” 

“Right.” Ed said the word so quietly she almost didn’t hear it. He was looking at the screen of Claire’s computer which he had been using to go over the information she had compiled so far, re-familiarising himself with it as he was prone to doing whenever they were in the middle of a situation that had yet to be resolved. When he spoke again it was in that musing fashion she knew well, the voice he used when he was still trying to work something out in his mind. “What if we clamped the ship?” 

“What?” 

“We could security lock the helm controls,” he went on, clarifying. “Make it so only certain people can get the ship moving again.” 

She was following along now. “People like Gordon?” With a tilt of her head she added, “And you?” 

Ed shook his head. “Just Gordon.” In response to her frown he added, “Just in case.” 

“But what if they get their hands on Gordon?” 

“Claire’s working on a guard,” Ed said, and she knew where he was going with that but he continued before she could object, “and we give the first dose to Gordon. If they can’t move the ship then they can’t do anything. Captain or no Captain, if the helm is locked then their whole plan is screwed.” 

“They would still have the shuttles,” Kelly reminded him. 

“Then we lock those too.” 

She should have known he would have thought of that. For a few moments she sat there looking at him and then she glanced out of the window, watching Gordon stick close to Claire as she busied herself with her task. Kelly couldn’t help but smile to herself as she noticed the Helmsman was actually paying attention to the Doctor’s actions, almost as if he was trying to follow along. Kelly suspected he was. A lot of people on the ship, too many really, thought of Gordon Malloy as little more than a pilot and a jokester. He was the best pilot in the Fleet, certainly, but he wasn’t to be taken too seriously. Kelly knew better. A glance at Ed told her he knew it as well. 

“That’s a lot of pressure,” she said quietly. 

Ed nodded. “He can handle it.” 

Kelly smiled, nodding as well. Ed was right. Gordon _could_ handle it. 

 

* * *

 

“ _Me_?” Gordon looked from one face to the other, wondering when everyone had decided to get high without him. “You’re kidding, right?” With a shake of his head he looked Ed in the eye. “I thought we agreed it should be you, man. You’re the one they need to get this whole thing moving.” 

“Not exactly,” Ed countered, giving him the slightest smile. “A ship needs her pilot.” 

“Yeah, and a ship needs her Captain. I thought we _agreed_.” He looked to Kelly and then to Doctor Finn but even though the latter hadn’t been in on the little discussion in the office that had obviously led to this decision there was no help to be found from either one of them. “Ed.” He looked to the other man. “You’re not serious.” 

“You can do this, Gordon.” 

It hadn’t really been about whether or not he could do it but looking around their small group Gordon would have had to be a fool to think of himself as the most important person present. He was the lowest-ranking and despite his reputation and skill at the helm of any ship he wasn’t ashamed to admit he was at the bottom of the proverbial totem pole in pretty much every other sense. That was okay. Gordon knew his strengths and it was piloting, flying, getting everything out of a ship that it had to give. This? This was nothing like that. 

His doubts had to be showing on his face because it was Doctor Finn herself who spoke up next, “It’s a good idea, Lieutenant. And it’s only the first dose, remember. I’m synthesising it as we speak. It won’t take long for me to manufacture another one.” 

“And that one’s for Ed.” 

“Right.” Gordon looked at Ed as he said that and he almost frowned but when their eyes met he saw the silent and subtle request not to react. He had to keep himself from looking at Kelly, wondering if she had any idea that Ed was planning on putting her before himself. She had to suspect it at least, it played right into her reasoning for the two of them not getting back together after all. Gordon just hoped he would have a chance to say something to Ed before it came to that so he could tell his best friend not to be an idiot. The desire to keep Kelly safe was something he could understand and respect but right here and now it was a secondary concern. Kelly wouldn’t want him to jeopardise the whole mission just for her. Actually, he was pretty sure she would hate that. 

He let out a sigh. Not only was he outnumbered but it wasn’t like the plan didn’t make sense. He felt his shoulders slump a little as he said, “Okay. So how do we do this?” 

“You will fail.” 

They all whirled, Gordon almost unbalancing himself completely in the process. He had to do a full one-eighty in order to turn to face the owner of the voice. Klyden was looking right at them from the bed to which he was secured and as they watched it was obvious the Moclan was trying to break his way free of the restraints holding him down. The tension that had just dropped out of Gordon’s shoulders jumped right back into them and he watched Ed and Kelly move closer to the bed before plucking up the courage to do the same. 

“Whatever you plan to do, you will fail.” 

The thing sounded exactly like Klyden. It was _creepy_. Gordon looked to Ed and Kelly, and then Doctor Finn, searching for some sign that they were just as unnerved as he was but he couldn’t see anything. Swallowing against the dryness in his throat he drew in a deep breath and steeled himself as much as possible, wanting to help present a united front. 

“You’re trying to spread to other worlds,” Ed said to the creature infecting and controlling Klyden, looking down at the Moclan from his place beside the bed. Gordon tried not to notice how close his friend was to the alien’s strong hand if that restraint failed. “And you’re hoping to use my ship to do it.” 

“Not hoping.” Klyden, or rather the thing pretending to be Klyden, actually smiled then. Gordon felt a chill race up his spine. “It is happening,” Klyden went on. “We will succeed.” 

Gordon felt brave enough to speak then, looking down at the Moclan as well as he said, “I wouldn’t count on that.” 

The sound that escaped Klyden’s throat could only really be described as a scoff. “ _You_ think that you can stop us?” He was looking right back at Gordon, not the others around the bed. “You.” The next sound was dismissive. “You are not strong.” 

Gordon frowned, breaking eye contact and looking around at the others. “Well _that’s_ rude.” 

“What do you mean by that?” Ed asked the Moclan, but Klyden refused to answer, remaining silent now, staring up at the ceiling. “You said he’s not strong. What does that mean?” Gordon looked to his side at Ed, recognising that his friend had picked up on something that he, at least, had missed in the moment. 

 _You are not strong_. Gordon replayed the words in his head and looked across sick bay to the figures on the beds. When he looked back to Klyden he couldn’t help but notice the difference, and not just in race. 

Doctor Finn had stepped away from the bed briefly and when she returned she moved to its head with a hypodermic in her hand. She paused only to look to Ed for approval. The Captain gave her a nod and she wasted no time in putting the tool to use, sedating the Moclan once more. Within moments he was unconscious again but Gordon was still watching his face, unmoving now though it was. 

When he looked up it was as he spoke a single word, calling the attention of the others to him. “Strength.” He raised an arm and swept it towards the back of the room. “ _Strength_.” He used his other hand to indicate Klyden at the same time. “What’s the difference?” 

“Oh my God.” Doctor Finn had followed his meaning. “They’re not just seeking out the most influential members of the crew,” she said, “but the _strongest_.” 

“ _What_?” Gordon suspected Ed understood but he just wanted more clarification. He could count on one hand with fingers to spare the number of times he had understood something when his best friend hadn’t. 

“ _That’s_ why John and the others slipped into comas. The demand the parasite places upon the physical body is so high that not everyone can tolerate it.” 

Kelly had obviously figured it out as well. “It’s like an overload.” 

“Exactly,” Doctor Finn agreed, looking down at the Moclan. “It explains why the host body slips into the coma, and why the parasite perishes in the process.” 

“So if a host isn’t physically strong enough to withstand the parasite, it ends up killing them _both_?” Ed’s brows had gone up now as he looked to their Chief Medical Officer for confirmation. She nodded and he looked down at Klyden and then to Gordon. 

“They obviously don’t think I’m a threat,” Gordon said, shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders. “Maybe I don’t need that vaccine after all.” That meant he could talk Ed into keeping it for himself. 

“You’re stronger than you think.” It was Kelly who spoke then and he looked past Ed to the First Officer before he had a chance to school his expression and hide his surprise. 

“She’s right,” Ed put in, nodding his head. “We’re sticking with the plan.” He laid his hand on Gordon’s shoulder. “You’re going first whether you like it or not.” 

 

* * *

 

“They have taken the one called Klyden.” 

“He has been a fool. Impulsive. Reckless.” 

“How do we proceed?” 

“As planned.” 

They all waited silently, watching. They were not convinced. 

“The opportunity will present itself. We must have patience.” 

“They _know_.” 

Murmurs of uncertainty and doubt. Unacceptable. 

“They do _not_ know. They suspect but they do not know. We have more than they think we do.” 

“And we can use this against them?” 

“Yes.” 

The murmurs had changed. Approving now, growing in confidence. Better. 

“Soon. Be ready.” 

Nods and acknowledgements. When they dispersed it was just as silently as they had gathered.


	12. In Motion

When Lieutenant Malloy asked the question about how exactly the vaccine worked Claire lifted her head and smiled at him, fully prepared to explain it before the Helmsman chuckled to himself and said, “On second thought, never mind. Let’s just go with _it does_ and leave it at that, huh?” 

With another smile she nodded her head. “Good idea,” she agreed and met his gaze one last time. “Ready?” 

The pilot drew in a breath, reminding her of his nervous energy when he had sat across from her in her office, preparing himself to take the psychological evaluation as part of his first run at the command test. He wasn’t drumming his fingers anxiously on his legs this time but that was likely only because he didn’t want to interfere with the procedure, she suspected, simple though it was. He was sitting so still. It was just a matter of injecting the substance into the Lieutenant and that would be that. She had run her tests and thoroughly examined the data available to her, and with help of computer simulations she hadn’t even needed a live subject upon which to test the vaccination. One look at Lieutenant Malloy told her he didn’t see it that way, she suspected he felt somewhat like a guinea pig sitting there on the edge of the bed, but nothing she could say would change that. 

So it was that without another word she pressed the hypodermic to his upper arm and triggered the release. After a few seconds she pulled it away again and lightly tugged down the sleeve of his shirt for him. 

He looked to her with eyes widened in surprise. “That’s it?” 

“That’s it,” she assured him, setting the device aside. Lifting her head as the Lieutenant rubbed curiously at his upper arm she looked to the Captain and the Commander. “I should have the next dose ready within the hour.” The second one would not take nearly as long as the first had and she already had it processing as they spoke. 

“All right,” the Captain said, exchanging a look with his First Officer, and then glancing to Lieutenant Malloy. “We can’t do anything else from here,” he went on, “so we need to split up.” 

“I’ll head out with you,” Lieutenant Malloy said, gesturing at the Captain even as he slipped off the bed. He looked around and then seemed to remember that he hadn’t yet acquired a replacement for the jacket he had used to cushion the other man’s head in the corridor. At the Captain’s questioning look the Lieutenant went on to say, “No offence to, well, _me_ , but Kelly’s the best bet to keep the Doc’ safe if anyone comes in here looking for trouble.” Both commanding officers tilted their heads, obviously conceding to that point. “And if we’re locking all the helm controls to me anyway—” 

“Then you should be there. Right.” Captain Mercer gave a nod of his head and looked to Claire, who had been listening to the exchange from her place nearby where she had been keeping a watchful eye over her equipment. “We’ll be back as soon as we can.” 

The Commander met his gaze as she said, “Be careful.” Claire looked back and forth between them and saw the concern there, just as prominent in one as it was in the other. She wasn’t entirely sure who was the more concerned out of the two. It was a close call. 

There was a moment in which the three of them stood there, none of them saying a word, and then with nods of determination the two men took their leave. Claire watched them go through the doors and then turned her gaze to Commander Grayson. When the other woman cleared her throat and turned back, giving a small tug on the hem of her jacket to straighten it, Claire was ready with a small smile of reassurance. “It won’t be long now,” she said, giving a small nod down at the equipment that was working on the second dose of the vaccination. 

Commander Grayson was looking down at it, her eyes narrowed as she said, “About that.” Claire looked up at her face and the other woman went on to say, “I had an idea.” 

 

* * *

 

Gordon was pulling the fresh jacket on as Ed checked the PM-44 at his side, keeping his eyes up as he did so. Carrying a weapon through the ship was hardly conspicuous at this point in time, even if it wasn’t something that anyone outside of Talla’s team normally did and even then that was a stretch. After what had happened in the corridor though, something that had to be widespread knowledge by this point, he doubted any of the crew would even blink at the sight of the weapon at his thigh. If nothing else it might give the infected pause if they were thinking about attacking the two of them. 

As they rounded the corner Ed looked up and down the corridor, checking it was clear, before he keyed open the door and stepped inside. Gordon followed and Ed locked it behind them, sealing them inside, taking a look around at Isaac’s lab before moving over to the main workstation and getting things started. 

“Hey,” Gordon said as he headed over. “I wanted to talk to you about something.” 

Ed had been waiting for this. He didn’t even look up from the station, wanting to keep working even as they were talking. “Oh yeah? About what?” Playing dumb wasn’t going to help either one of them but Gordon had to know he wasn’t about to have his mind changed about any of this. 

“Dude, come on.” Gordon was standing opposite him on the other side of the main station in the laboratory. When the Helmsman didn’t say anything else Ed let out a sigh and shook his head. 

“It makes sense,” he said, wanting to leave it at that. 

Gordon wasn’t having any of it, apparently. “You know that’s not true.” 

Ed looked up then, pausing in his work only as long as it took to fix the other man with a level stare. “What are you saying?” 

“You’re doing it because you don’t want her to get hurt.” 

He could have denied those words as soon as they were out of the other man’s mouth but it would have been a lie and they both would have known it. After Kelly there was no one aboard who knew him better than Gordon and it would have been a waste of their time to pretend otherwise. “Of course I am,” he said, “but that’s not the only reason.” 

“So what then?” 

Ed went back to his work, going as quickly as he could while still being careful not to make any errors. A mistake during a process like this would mean starting again and they didn’t have time for that. It was going to take a while as it was. So he worked for a few moments, prompting a command code panel and entering it swiftly and without having to pause to think about it, waiting for it to vanish again before he went on. “If something goes wrong I know who I want running this ship,” he told Gordon, keeping his eyes down on the panel and the process there. It was easier to focus on the work than it was to meet Gordon’s eye as well. He didn’t want to see how the other man had to be looking at him right now. 

“Man, that’s crazy.” 

Thankfully there was a natural pause in which the computer worked through a short process. That allowed Ed to lift his head and fix Gordon with a questioning look. 

“The whole point of _you_ getting the other dose of this stuff is so nothing _can_ go wrong,” Gordon pointed out, gesturing at his own arm and then across at Ed. “It doesn’t make any sense to give it to Kelly instead and she’d be the first one to tell you that. You know she would.” 

Ed _did_ know that but he wasn’t about to admit it. He looked down at the computer again. It was ready for him to continue.

Gordon took his lack of rebuttal as an invitation to go on. “And let’s not forget you outrank her. If she’s immune and you’re not and those things get you? It’s game over anyway.” The other man shook his head so emphatically there was no way for Ed to miss it even with his gaze turned downward. “You’re not thinking with your head.” 

Ed couldn’t help but look up then. “Dammit, Gordon.” But he didn’t have anything to follow that up with and that left the two of them holding one another’s gazes over the main workstation in the lab, an awkward silence falling between them. The computer gave a soft chime and he had to get back to the process quickly. He really didn’t want to have to start over. 

The other man’s voice was quiet when he started to talk again. “Ed.” He paused there, either considering his words or trying to gauge whether or not he was being listened to. It was several seconds before he continued, saying, “I know you love her, man. I know you never stopped, even after—” Gordon caught himself and moved past the words without speaking them aloud. “But this won’t help either one of you. Kelly wouldn’t thank you for it. You know that.” 

Silently Ed was grateful that he had gotten through the main process by that point and he could bring a hand up to swipe it over his face without interrupting his work. When he sighed it was tightly that he did so, trying to think of a dozen things at once and barely able to concentrate on a single one of them in that moment. Waving his hand he said, “It needs your authorisation.” As Gordon came around the station and input his unique code Ed took the time to think over what the other man had said. He was quiet while Gordon worked, not wanting to interrupt him, but when the Helmsman stepped aside and gave him room to go through the follow-up procedures he said, “She’s stronger than me, in just about every way.” He felt the weight of his friend’s gaze on him but pressed on without looking up, “Whatever these things could throw at her, she can take it.” Ed wasn’t so sure that he could. 

Gordon was shaking his head again. “She’s never going to agree to it.” 

“I know that.” Ed heard the tightness in his own voice, the tension there, and it was only partially due to how hard he was concentrating on the task at hand. “But she can hate me for it later.” 

 

* * *

 

Kelly looked over the Doctor’s shoulder and couldn’t help but smile at the data as it played over the screen. “And it can be triggered from any station?” 

“With the right code,” the other woman responded, “absolutely.” 

Her smile widened and when she met the Doctor’s gaze she saw the other woman was just as pleased as she was. She was about to congratulate the other woman on her work when the doors to sick bay hissed open and she straightened, tensing in preparation for whatever might come next. When Ed and Gordon stepped through, both of them looking back over their shoulder, she felt a surge of relief. It was tempered by that backwards glance though. “You guys okay?” 

“Man,” Gordon was saying, even as Ed keyed a code into the panel on their side of the door. “There is _nothing_ creepier than knowing you’re being followed and not being able to do a damn thing about it.” 

“You were followed?” 

Ed finished locking the door, obviously not wanting to take any chances, and turned to face Doctor Finn to answer her question. “We think so.” 

“But no one saw what you were doing in the lab?” Kelly asked. Ed shook his head in a negative and she nodded, reassured. “Okay. That’s good.” 

“Why didn’t they attack you?” Doctor Finn asked, moving back across the room with purpose. 

“The weapon probably made them think twice,” Ed said as he followed the Doctor. Kelly fell into step with him with Gordon bringing up the rear. “How’s it coming?” 

“Just about ready,” the Doctor said with a nod of her head, obviously pleased with the process. 

“What about you? How did it go?” Kelly looked between the two men, noticing that Gordon’s attention was on the comatose figures populating the beds in the room. 

Ed met her gaze. “Main helm control and all shuttles are security locked.” 

“And they can only be released by Gordon?” 

He gave a nod. “Only by him personally.” 

Kelly drew in a breath. “Good.” 

“Guys.” Gordon’s voice was subdued and Kelly recognised that something was bothering him, that he had something on his mind that he just couldn’t shake. When he realised all three of them were looking his way he said, “There’s something that’s been bugging me.” He gestured to the unresponsive figures. “We know these things tried to infect John and the others, but—” With a troubled look on his face he looked their way. “Why did they _kill_ some people? Or try to kill them?” 

Kelly had been wondering that herself and she had been turning the matter over in her mind enough to form a theory. “Maybe the people who were murdered had figured it out,” she said, “or were at least suspicious enough that they had to be silenced, and quickly.” 

“Yeah,” Gordon said slowly, “but _murder_? Seriously?” 

Ed tilted his head and lifted his brows in a _who knows_ gesture that both Kelly and Gordon recognised easily. “We don’t know how these things work, at least not mentally.” He looked to Doctor Finn who picked up on the thread with a theory of her own. 

“They’re capable of tapping into the host’s higher brain functions, that much we’ve seen, especially in how effortlessly they can blend in without being detected, but the parasites themselves likely operate on a much more basic level.” 

“Basic like primitive?” Kelly asked. The Doctor nodded. “Fight or flight,” she went on, looking to Ed and then Gordon. 

“Like when Klyden attacked you guys and then bailed as soon as we showed up.” Gordon had obviously caught up with everyone else’s line of thinking. It was his turn to raise his brows this time, looking back at their unresponsive crewmembers. “Jeez. So don’t get cornered by one of these things, basically.” 

“Basically,” Ed agreed, just as a chime sounded. At first Kelly thought perhaps it was the device Doctor Finn was working with and then she realised it was the door. Someone wanted to come in. None of them moved and then the chime sounded again. It was followed shortly after by a knocking sound. The chime sounded a third time. 

“Wow,” Gordon mumbled, uneasy. “Pushy.” He turned to look back at the Doctor. “You expecting someone, Doc’?” When she shook her head he looked to Kelly and Ed. 

The device Doctor Finn was working with beeped, almost triumphantly, and she relieved it of its contents, stepping forward to join them as she loaded the substance into a hypodermic. She held it up as she stood between Ed and Kelly. “I’m guessing we’re out of time?” she asked no one in particular. 

Ed reached up and took the hypodermic as he said, “Looks that way.” As he put the device in his pocket he looked across at Kelly. “Time to go.” 

Kelly gave him a nod and looked down the line at Gordon. “You ready for this?” The Helmsman hesitated for only a moment and then nodded. Kelly turned her head to look down at their Doctor. “Okay,” she said. “Let’s go get your kids.” 

 

* * *

 

Obviously whoever it was who had been at the main door to sick bay hadn’t anticipated the group cutting through the side exit and out that way. When they were all the way out of sick bay the four of them broke into a run and didn’t bother to look back. Ed led the way and Kelly brought up the rear, keeping the other two members of their party between them as they went. Kelly was the faster runner, always had been, but Ed felt better having her at their six. 

The subject of the children had come up early on into the formulation of their plan. There was no way Doctor Finn would be leaving the ship without her boys and none of them had argued. They would have grabbed all of the children on board and loaded them onto the shuttle and out of harm’s way for whatever came next if they could but they just didn’t have time for that. 

It was a short sprint to Doctor Finn’s quarters where her boys were waiting for her. Neither one of them wasted any time in asking more than a couple of questions before following their mother’s commands, allowing her to hurry them out of their quarters and into the hall where Ed and the others were waiting. From there it was another short sprint to the next door on their journey and it was Doctor Finn who pressed the chime. 

When Topa answered he looked between the faces of those gathered, obviously searching for either one of his fathers. “Papa hasn’t been home all day,” he said to them. He meant Klyden. 

“We know,” the Doctor said to him. “Listen, Topa, we need you to come with us.” She had a comscanner in her hand and after a quick glance at it she gave an approving nod. He was clear, it seemed, just like her own children. “Can you do that?” 

Topa looked between the faces of those gathered. “All right.” There was no more hesitation than that. Ed couldn’t help but wonder if Bortus had prepared his son for situations like this and instructed him to go with any of the senior staff if they asked it of him. Whatever the case the Moclan child stepped out of his quarters willingly and joined their group. Ed turned his head just in time to see a pair of security officers rounding the corner. They were both armed. 

“Go, go, _go_.” He and Kelly were both at the rear now, Gordon at the front of the party as they broke out running. Ed didn’t take much time to aim before firing off a shot, Kelly following suit, causing the pair at the other end of the corridor to duck out of sight and into cover. It was the window of opportunity they had been hoping to create. They both turned and sprinted after the others. 

They were close to the shuttle bay when another group appeared, this one comprised of at least four that Ed could count. They weren’t all security either, from what he could tell, but they were all armed. The door to the shuttle bay was right there ahead of them but they were going to need cover to get there and Ed exchanged a glance with Kelly, the two of them making the same decision at the same time without having to say a word. “Gordon.” It was enough to get the Helmsman’s attention as they crouched at the edge of the corridor. “On the count of three,” he said to the other man, “ _run_.” 

Before Gordon could argue Ed counted off. As soon as he hit three he stood to his full height and started to fire around the corner. Kelly was watching their backs and had started to fire as well. The pair from earlier had obviously caught up with them. The team from down the hall were caught enough off guard by Ed’s sudden retaliation that they pulled back, giving Gordon, Doctor Finn, and the kids just enough time to get to the shuttle bay doors and vanish through them. 

Ed was about to start worrying about which way he and Kelly were going to go but then she was appearing at his side and joining him in firing at the mixed group. A fleeting glance back showed him the pair from before dropped to the floor. They stood their ground at the junction for a while longer, Ed counting off a full minute in his mind before he and Kelly had dispatched all but one of the other group. Only then did they turn and flee back the way they had come. 

They had given Gordon and the others enough time to get clear. Now they had to get somewhere safe.


	13. From Bad to Worse

Riding in an elevator had probably never been so harrowing, Kelly was sure. All the way up from Deck E she had been waiting for the thing to grind to a halt, trapping them inside, but when the doors hissed open and let them out she allowed herself a moment to feel shocked. It passed quickly and she checked the way was clear, motioning to Ed once she was sure. There were so many blind corners on the ship, something that normally didn’t faze her in the least, but right now with no way of knowing who was friend or foe she couldn’t help but resent the design a little. 

She let Ed lead the way and he opted to keep his pace brisk but calm as they made their way down one corridor and around the next on their way to their destination. All she could think about the entire way was that hypodermic in his pocket and how much she hated that he hadn’t used it yet but she didn’t let that anxiety distract her from the very real danger of the moment. 

They had almost made it to the right door when a shot struck the wall less than a foot from her shoulder. Ed was close enough to the door that he keyed it open quickly and then grabbed hold of Kelly’s arm, yanking her in with him. She stumbled on the way over the threshold but managed not to fall, catching herself on the back of the closest chair, turning just in time to watch him seal them inside. 

It was only then that she realised she was a little out of breath. As she straightened she looked down at the PM-44 in her hand, checking the charge on the weapon. Satisfied with the level she lifted her eyes to Ed, watching him as he moved back from the door. Something heavy hit it from the other side, sudden and loud enough that they both started physically. 

Ed turned towards her and she looked right back at him. It was only a fleeting glance before the very real danger they were in set in anew. Kelly turned her head and looked around Ed’s quarters, angling her gaze up to the top of the central staircase. They could bottleneck any would-be attackers up there and if push came to shove they had his bathroom as one last barrier between them and whoever it was on the other side of the door. 

When she dropped her gaze she saw Ed doing the same, obviously coming to the same conclusion as her. As another sudden bang sounded from the other side of the door, loud and hard enough that it felt like the entire room shook from the force, Ed waved for her to go ahead of him. She didn’t waste any time arguing but instead sprinted up the staircase as swiftly as she could, turning when she was at the top to watch him follow her. 

“Bathroom?” she suggested hurriedly and Ed shook his head. She looked in that direction and realised he was right. It would give them one last strong barrier for whoever was pursuing them to have to break through but then they would have nowhere else to go, and it wasn’t a big room either. As she turned back she figured out what Ed was trying to do the second she saw him manhandling the room’s only other piece of furniture outside of the bed. The PM-44 went back into its holster briefly so she could help him to slide the long chair over in line with the foot of the bed before they worked together quickly to tip it onto its side. As cover went it was crude and likely wouldn’t afford them much protection for long but it was better than nothing. 

Hunkered down behind the chair beside Ed she recovered the weapon from her side and readied it again. “Ed, listen,” she said, raising her voice a little to ensure he would hear her over the sounds of impacts from below. “Claire worked something out for the ship, for the rest of the crew.” 

Ed looked her way. “What?” 

“There’s no time to explain it properly,” Kelly pointed out, nodding her head in the direction of the stairs and therefore the banging from below. “But whatever happens you need to get to a station, _any_ station, and activate Environmental Program Finn Four-Zero-Two-Zero. It needs your authorisation code to activate.” 

Something about the expression on Ed’s face made her think he wasn’t happy about it needing his code but she couldn’t think why that would be a problem. It had been the best call to make when she and Claire had been working on her idea. 

Instead of clarifying what that look meant he asked her, “Any station?” 

“Any station.” She nodded her head. 

Ed drew in a breath. “All right.” He dug in his pocket then and she felt a small swell of relief but when he pulled the hypodermic loose he handed it out to her instead. “Take it, Kel.” Her eyes snapped back up to his face and she frowned, not understanding. He could inject himself, surely. “Kel, _take_ it.” 

She understood him then. For a couple of seconds it was like she had forgotten how to breathe but a fresh impact against the door below brought her out of her shocked state. “Ed, you can’t be serious.” 

“Kelly, I’d feel a lot better knowing you’re immune,” he said and she felt a flash of indignant anger but before she could give it voice he continued, “and if there’s anyone I trust to get this ship and the crew out of this mess, it’s you.” He held the hypodermic closer to her. “You’re important, Kelly. It needs to be you.” 

She searched his face, noting the concern and the determination there, all the while aware of the fact that the banging from below was getting louder and more rhythmic. There was more than one person down there now and they were working together. The door wouldn’t hold forever. “Ed—” 

When he spoke again, cutting her off, there was a quiet desperation in his voice that made her chest ache. “Kelly, _please_.” 

For just a second she hesitated, her hand halfway raised to push the device back in his direction, but she met his eyes anew and saw that he wouldn’t take no for an answer. She had to take it from him. So that was what she did. 

And then she used it. 

Ed gasped and started when she pressed it down into his thigh, triggering the release and holding it steady even as he lifted his eyes to her, wide with shock and disbelief. “Kel—” 

“ _You’re_ important, Ed,” she told him, tossing the thing aside now that she was done with it. It was useless to them now. “Their plan, whatever it is, it doesn’t work without you. It has to be _you_. Don’t you get that?” She held his gaze the entire time, wanting him to understand that there had never been any other option, not in her mind. She couldn’t think of anything he could have said to convince her to take the vaccine for herself, especially not when the stakes were so high. There was no time to go into his motivations either. She could be mad at him for that later. “It had to be you,” she told him again when she realised he was still staring at her in shocked silence, shaking her head. 

That was when the sound of buckling metal came crashing up from below and Kelly tensed behind their crude cover, looking to Ed as she pulled down as deep a breath as her lungs would allow. The door had given way. This was it. 

The first crewmember who came up the stairs was sent right back down it in a heap after taking a shot in the shoulder. The next one went right over the railing and landed with a loud thud below. Kelly allowed herself a moment to cringe when they landed, hoping the damage wasn’t too severe, and then two of them managed to come up simultaneously. She and Ed struck them at the same time and whoever was below had to extract their unconscious bodies from the staircase in order to clear it. 

Too late Kelly saw a hand at the edge of the balcony and it was either shout a warning and risk it not being enough or literally shove Ed to the ground. She opted for the latter, practically driving him down with her own body. She heard the shot as it was fired and when she lifted her head and tossed her hair out of her face she realised with a rush of dread what had happened. 

Whoever had fired the shot had raised the setting on their weapon to maximum. The chair was just _gone_. 

The crewmember who had clambered up to fire the shot through the balcony was still there and she aimed her weapon to take a shot at them just as someone came to the top of the stairs. The sight of Bortus standing there with the weapon raised in his hand almost rooted her to the spot completely. They both fired off shots at the same moment. Kelly’s struck its mark and sent the crewmember crashing down from their precarious perch. From her side there was a clipped shout. Bortus’ shot had found its target as well, she realised, turning her head just in time to see Ed thrown back and down to the ground. He didn’t get up again. 

There was no time to check if he was all right. As quickly as possible she clambered onto the bed and flung herself across its breadth in a roll that carried her all the way off the other side. She swung her weapon around to fire at Bortus but he was no longer alone. Two more members of the crew had come up to join him and she only had enough time to fire off a single shot before one of theirs caught her in the chest and flung her back against the wall. She was out before she hit the ground. 

 

* * *

 

It felt like he’d been hit by a freight train. Or like he’d been punched in the chest by an angry Moclan. He wasn’t sure which would have been worse. All he knew for several long seconds, or maybe minutes, was that it hurt to breathe. When the worst of the pain passed he realised whatever he was lying on was hard, and therefore uncomfortable. The lights overhead were too bright as well, he realised when he tried to open his eyes. With a thick groan he rolled over, first onto his side and then his front, pressing down on that hard ground with both hands to try and get up. 

“Kel?” She had been right beside him before he’d been hit. 

_Bortus_. He remembered being stunned by the sight of the Moclan bearing down on them, weapon in hand, and it was with that alarming memory in mind that he lifted his head. There were a pair of legs directly in front of him but they weren’t Bortus’. He recognised that much immediately, even with his senses still swimming a little. They were too slender and the banding of the pants was the wrong colour. 

A cold ball of dread formed quickly in his stomach and as he lifted his gaze, tracing his eyes up those legs, past the hips and further still, he felt it sinking lower and lower. It dropped right down into the pit of his stomach and just about turned to ice when he reached the face. 

Talla’s green eyes were looking down at him and there was a shadow of a smile on her lips. Normally that smile would have put him at ease but now he couldn’t help but feel like he wanted to back away. There was no shame in that feeling either, not in Ed’s mind. Talla was beyond formidable, a force to be reckoned with, and right now that smile looked decidedly predatory. Ed thought it was just about the smartest thing he could do to be afraid of her right then. 

“Hello, Captain,” she said. “Nice of you to join us.” 

“Talla.” He didn’t know what else to say. Looking to her side he found Bortus, also looking down at him. To her other side was Rendell. When had they freed her from the brig? Managing to rise to his knees and take his first good look around he recognised they were in his office, of all places. He brought his gaze back to the Xelayan. “Where’s Kelly?” 

“You two put up a pretty good fight, I have to admit,” she said, ignoring his question. “I was almost impressed.” Her smile grew a little. “ _Almost_.” 

God, she sounded so normal, just like the Talla Keyali they had all come to know and respect. Ed never would have known she wasn’t herself. He hadn’t, he reminded himself. Not even for a single second had he suspected that his Chief of Security was anyone other than herself. He glanced to her side. The same went for Bortus. When had they been infected? 

A sick sense of certainty settled over him then and he looked back to Talla, wanting to be wrong and yet already certain that he wasn’t. “The survivor on the ship. The captain. It jumped to you.” 

Talla actually laughed then, looking to Bortus who didn’t smile and yet managed to look amused anyway. Somehow that was more unnerving. “A little slow on the uptake, Captain, but you got there in the end.” She crouched in front of him then, coming down to his eye level. “I was right under your nose the entire time and you didn’t even realise.” Her eyes narrowed. “How does that make you feel?” 

Ed knew a baiting question when he heard one and he managed to bite back any impulsive retorts his brain came up with, pushing them all aside to ask instead, “What did you do with Kelly?” 

Talla rolled her eyes, rising to her full height with a dramatic sigh before she tapped her comm. “Come on in.” 

The door to his office opened and Ed turned, still kneeling on the ground, to see Kelly led into the room by two of Talla’s team. She looked around the room and settled her gaze on Ed last of all. 

“Kelly, are you all right?” If he hadn’t had two of the ship’s strongest crewmembers so close to him he might have risen to his feet. 

Silently she nodded her head and moved closer to him. Ed frowned, watching her approach him, worried that something was wrong. It wasn’t like Kelly to hold her tongue even when the odds were stacked against her. “Kel?” 

The back of her hand cracked against the side of his face. It happened so fast he didn’t even see it coming. It caught him so completely off guard that it almost threw him to the ground, the air catching in his lungs as he reflexively raised a hand of his own to his face. The sharp pain of the strike was spreading outward. 

From behind him the thing controlling Talla let out a laugh and actually clapped her hands. 

Ed lifted his head, his bottom jaw dropped a little from the shock and the pain of the strike, and looked to Kelly. She was still standing there looking down at him. The uncertainty had gone from her eyes now and there was a confidence there that he recognised and yet there was something unnervingly alien about it. 

“No.” The word was out of his mouth before he could stop himself. It was such a futile thing to say, under his breath though it had been, but he couldn’t keep it in. Seeing her standing there and knowing that she wasn’t herself, it was almost more than he could bear. It was his Kelly and yet it wasn’t. “Goddammit, Kelly, _no_.” Why hadn’t she just taken the vaccine for herself? 

Ed knew why. She had told him why. 

That didn’t make losing her to one of those things any easier to swallow, or stomach, and he had to drop his gaze from her. She had had the right idea all along. He should have just injected her when he had the chance. 

“Well, now that _that’s_ taken care of,” Talla said, coming around from behind him and standing looking down at him again. “Should we get this over with?” She gestured between Ed and Kelly. “Unless you two want to duke it out some more?” Her gaze ended up on the thing controlling Kelly who tilted her head a little to the side, as if contemplating that idea before simply smiling instead. 

It was Kelly’s smile and yet it wasn’t. A bad taste rushed up onto the back of Ed’s tongue. It was easier to stare at Talla’s knees, or rather the space just beyond them. 

“You ready, Captain?” Talla was looming over him. Before she spoke again she lowered to a crouch once more and met his gaze directly, her own eyes narrowed a fraction as she said, “This might hurt a little. Just so you know.” 

Her hand was around his neck before he could move and she was driving him back and down to the ground. She did it so swiftly and with so much power that he didn’t even have a chance to fight her. Once he was down he knew he was trapped there but that didn’t mean he couldn’t lash out at her. That had been the plan, at least, before someone caught his wrists and pinned them to the ground as well. It was Bortus, he realised, and there was no way in hell he was getting free of that grip either. Trying to kick his legs was useless as well. Talla had braced her weight perfectly across him, straddling his waist and trapping him completely. 

His heart was racing in his chest and he couldn’t help but look towards Kelly, naturally looking to her for the help she was always there to give to him whenever he needed it. 

_Not Kelly_. 

It wasn’t her. Not really. His heart jumped again, his fear spiking, but all he could do was continue to struggle futilely as Talla’s other hand came up and took hold of his bottom jaw. She held his head in place effortlessly, increasing the pressure of her fingers and thumb until Ed had no choice but to open his mouth. It was that or she would break his jaw, he knew. He could see it in her eyes as she stared down at him. 

She held his gaze as she leaned closer, bowed over him, opening her own mouth. It was only then that Ed realised what was going to happen and by then it was much too late. Something rushed out of Talla’s open mouth and into his own. He felt it driving back to the rear of his throat and almost gagged. Talla’s hand moved, forcing his jaw closed and clamping over his mouth instead, holding it shut. 

Ed felt the thing working its way all the way to the back and then down. He tried to arch up off the ground but Talla and Bortus held him fast. There was nowhere for him to go. He squeezed his eyes shut and struggled anyway, using up what little strength he had to try and delay the inevitable. 

When the blackness surged up to take him he didn’t even try to hold it back.


	14. Outnumbered

The host it had claimed was a female but such a _strong_ one. Every little thing was effortless and without struggle. It had been incredibly lucky to find a body so strong and seemingly so without limitation, and without having to switch multiple times. The leader of the last ship had been strong at first but that strength had started to dwindle and fail. There had been battles and injuries, more than the body could take. It had been dying when this one had found it. Good timing. 

Multiple times since coming to this new ship it had replicated and spread outward but never once had it contemplated finding a new form for itself. This one was far too strong. And powerful in other ways too. It was a leader in its own right, it commanded others. That had been useful. 

It had had to be careful though. There was so much strength in this one, it was so easy to damage things. It had learned that early on. Just a little too much pressure and things would break. This was the strongest body it had ever had. The power was almost intoxicating. 

Rocking back on the heels of the body it had claimed it looked down at the one beneath them. The leader of this ship. If this body had not been so enjoyable it would have taken that one instead but it did not need a badge or a title to be recognised as dominant. It was the first, the original, the one from which all others had come. They all saw that, _felt_ that, and responded to it. 

The one commanding the Second Officer released its grasp on the body below them and moved away, needing only a single glance from its real leader in order to do so. It remained crouched over the body, watching it, waiting for the moment when its newest progeny would take a firm hold and with it control. It would falter at first, there would be a moment of struggle, of resistance, but they were strong. Its progeny would win. 

Beneath it the body shifted, slowly and then with a jerk. The moment had arrived. Without its host it could not smile but it did so now, and widely, waiting eagerly for that moment to pass. 

But it did not pass. The smile wavered. And then it dropped away completely. 

Something was wrong. 

 

* * *

 

It was like a fire that started in his throat and raced down to his chest. For several seconds he couldn’t breathe, like his lungs had closed up completely, and then what little air he could get in there was searing. He choked and wanted to retch but nothing came. He felt the spasm take his body and fought against it at first, instinctively, before something told him not to. Something told him to let it happen. So he rode it out, hating and fearing every second of it until eventually it eased off and he was just trembling instead. 

Ed didn’t even realise he had rolled awkwardly on the ground until he felt his hand brush the side of his face as he pressed his brow against the carpet. The fingers of that hand clawed at the carpet. He did retch then. It was a sudden and violent impulse from deep down and he had no power to stop it. It came crashing up, first one and then another, and he felt his body trying to curl in on itself as he retched and heaved. 

That fire was building, the burning was getting worse with every passing moment, and after what felt like the hundredth violent retch something raked up his throat and over his tongue. The taste and the burn was far worse than bile and it didn’t stop with just one. Something wet struck the ground, and the sound only made him heave again. Something was caught at the back of his throat, hot and horrid. Another retch, and then another. It felt like it would never end. It felt like he had emptied his stomach completely by the time it relented at last and his whole body was shaking and he could scarcely catch his breath. 

“ _What_ —” It was a breathless utterance from somewhere close by, disbelief bordering on horror. 

Ed managed to open his eyes then, stinging and streaming though they were, and saw the ugly mess on the carpet down in front of him. With the back of one arm he shakily wiped at his mouth, clearing the saliva and whatever else had been clinging there onto the sleeve of his jacket, trying to make sense of the pile. It was bile and vomit, wet and fresh, but in its centre was a fleshy mass that twitched and jerked pitifully. As he watched, his vision still blurred, the thing seized and shuddered and then ceased moving altogether. 

There was a harsh sound from close by and then Ed was on his back on the ground, thrown over so violently that the whole room spun in a sickening fashion. Ed groaned, a tight and discomforted sound, grimacing fiercely. 

“What have you _done_?” It was as close to a growl as he had ever heard from a humanoid throat and if he hadn’t opened his eyes and seen Talla bowed over him he wouldn’t have known who was speaking. One of her hands seized him by the throat, closing off his airway completely. He clutched at her wrist, fighting for breath. 

The ferocity on Talla’s face was terrifying, the murderous intent in eyes that normally held nothing of the sort. Her teeth were bared as she loomed over him and her breaths came in ragged gasps, furious and half-mad. 

“ _Stop_.” 

Ed barely heard the voice, the pounding of his own frantic heartbeat was so loud in his ears, but he felt the pressure around his throat stilling and then easing. It didn’t release enough for him to suck down any air though and he continued to try and claw at Talla’s wrist to no avail. 

“You’ll kill him.” Even though his vision was wavering as his body fought for oxygen he could make out the blue of the uniform and the blonde hair. Kelly had moved closer. “And we still need him.” 

Talla snarled again. Literally _snarled_. When she released her grasp around his throat at last it was angrily that she did so, giving him a shove that had the back of his head thudding against the carpet. Ed was too busy gasping and coughing raggedly to feel the pain of the dull impact, his whole body racked by the fit as his lungs burned. Getting enough air down into them felt like it would never be possible, his whole chest was aching, but he calmed his breathing as quickly as he could and tried to collect himself. There was no time for anything else. 

When he shoved himself back far enough to use his desk as a support to sit up, at least, he opened his eyes to find Bortus and Rendell watching him from across the room. Their gazes never wavered, they never took their focus from him for so much as a second. Kelly and Talla were between him and the door. He found himself watching Kelly as she waited silently for Talla to finish pacing back and forth in front of her. 

 _Any station_. Her words echoed in his head and he tilted his head down and back a little, enough to pass the motion off as just another part of his recovery but not so much that the pair watching him would figure out he was thinking through just how far he would have to move to get to his computer. Kelly had said Claire’s program could be launched from any station. 

Ed lifted a hand and rubbed at his throat, turning his eyes back to the infected individuals nearby. It wasn’t a large room and he was seriously outnumbered. They would reach him before he could even hit a single key. He couldn’t do it here. There was no way. 

That meant getting away from all of them and finding his way to any other station clear of the infected. It wouldn’t take him long to punch in his code but if any of the infected realised what he was doing they would stop him in a heartbeat. And there was no way they wouldn’t realise, not when he had to trigger the program verbally. 

But how many uninfected crew were left? What if he was alone now? 

In that moment it was all Ed could do to keep from feeling a rush of despair. 

 

* * *

 

“Mom?” His voice was small and quiet but he knew his mother would hear him anyway. The interior of the shuttle was not very large and his voice, no matter how small or quiet, would carry easily. Sure enough his mother’s head turned and she looked at him. Ty allowed himself to feel a little better, if only for a moment, sitting in his seat wringing his hands in his lap. “What’s going on?” 

“Everything will be all right, sweetie,” she told him, giving him one of those smiles that he knew wasn’t real, at least not all the way. She was smiling for his sake, not because she felt like smiling. Ty turned his head and looked at Topa. The other boy was quiet as well but that was far from unusual. Topa was hardly the most talkative child aboard the _Orville_. 

“What about everybody else?” Marcus asked from his seat at the front of the shuttle, directly in front of Ty. “Why is it just us?” 

Their mother shook her head and tapped a few keys at the controls. They were not far away from the _Orville_ but they had cloaked shortly after leaving the shuttle bay. Ty had heard her say so, and she had heard Lieutenant Malloy tell her to do that as soon as they were out in space. 

“I can’t explain what’s going on right now, boys,” she said to them, looking back briefly. 

Ty frowned, glancing at Topa again. He was still wringing his hands when he asked, “Where’s Isaac?” There were times lately when he knew better than to ask about the Kaylon after everything that had happened with Isaac’s people, it was a difficult subject for his mother to discuss with them, but if anyone could keep them safe surely it was him. No matter how upset their mother was with the Kaylon surely it was better for them to be safe _with_ him than in danger _without_ him. 

For several moments she was quiet at the helm, her eyes forward, almost as if she hadn’t heard him. But then she responded, and it was her voice that was quiet now. “We don’t know, baby.” 

His frown deepened but he didn’t have to ask anything. Marcus got there first. “What do you mean? He’s not on the ship?” 

She shook her head. 

Marcus twisted in his seat and looked back at Ty. “I don’t get it,” his older brother said with a shake of his head. “He’s just _gone_?” 

“Where did he go?” Ty was trying his hardest not to let anyone see that there were tears in his eyes. He tried blinking them away and then rubbed at them with his hands, taking a deep breath. Their mother needed him to be brave right now. That meant he couldn’t cry. She had said everything would be all right and he trusted her. He always trusted her. 

“We don’t know,” she told them and when Ty lowered his hands he saw her shaking her head. Obviously she was just as confused as they were. He didn’t like that. 

“But he can’t have just _disappeared_ ,” Marcus was saying. “That doesn’t make any sense.” 

Ty was watching their mother’s face. For a moment she looked like she was going to say something to Marcus but then she stopped. She frowned. She looked back at Ty, and then at Topa as well. When she turned her eyes to Marcus again the frown was gone. “Marcus,” she said to him, and Ty thought he saw the very beginnings of a _real_ smile then. “You’re a genius.” She reached over and gave her oldest son’s knee a squeeze, turning to smile at Ty. It was definitely a real smile. 

As happy as he was to see a real smile on her face Ty didn’t really understand what was going on. “Mom?” But she was too busy working the controls and as Ty turned his eyes to the viewer he watched as the _Orville_ began to disappear. The shuttle was moving, turning around and beginning to head in the other direction. 

 

* * *

 

His lungs had just stopped burning when a shadow dropped over him again. Ed looked up from where he had remained sitting in front of his desk to find Talla looking down at him. Tempted though he was to turn his gaze away from her he held it instead. Maybe that was the wrong thing to do, like trying to stare down a dangerous predatory animal in the wild, but it was that or show fear and that wouldn’t help him either. 

As options went he didn’t have much to work with right then. The best he could do was bide his time until an opportunity presented itself. 

He wasn’t ready for her to strike him. It caught him across the face and just about threw him right over onto the ground but she had hold of him again before he could hit the floor. He was still reeling from the blow when he felt his back hit the wall and he opened his eyes to find Talla right in front of him. She had hauled him several feet across the room to pin him to the wall with one arm across his chest. Even without trying he knew he wouldn’t be able to break away from her. So he didn’t try. It would have been a waste of energy. 

“What did you do? Tell me.” 

Ed just looked back at Talla. It wasn’t really her, he kept telling himself, but it was hard to not see _her_ staring back at him like that. There was so much anger in her face, so much aggression. Even in her toughest moments he had never seen her like that. 

“Tell me,” she repeated, more slowly, her voice dropped lower. “Or I can _make_ you tell me.” He saw the faintest traces of a smile playing at the corners of her lips even as the pressure across his chest started to increase, just a little but it was more than enough for the threat to be very real. 

Kelly spoke up from nearby. “We need him.” 

Talla let out a huff of air. “Not _all_ of him.” 

If Ed didn’t know better he would have sworn Kelly sighed as she straightened and moved closer, not interfering with Talla directly but coming up to her side instead. Talla, or rather the creature inside of her, was in charge here. That much was obvious. 

“The Doctor immunised him,” Kelly said to Talla. “She created a vaccine that she believed would work against us.” She turned her eyes to Ed then. “Evidently it does.” 

Talla’s lip curled briefly, unhappily. “Evidently.” She kept Ed pinned to the wall as she turned her gaze to Kelly. “How many did the Doctor immunise?” 

“Two.” 

“Him and who else?” 

“The pilot.” 

Talla made a low sound in her throat. Ed couldn’t tell if it was thoughtful or dismissive. She turned her gaze back to him then, her eyes narrowed. “You locked helm controls,” she said to him, not asking a question but stating a fact. 

“Yes.” He answered it like it was a question anyway. If nothing else it would stall for time. 

“You will _un_ lock them.” 

“No,” Ed told her, his voice surprisingly steady. He actually smiled at her a little. Maybe that wasn’t the best idea. “I won’t.” 

Talla bared her teeth at him again and Ed saw the tightening of her shoulders. Whatever she was preparing to do, he didn’t doubt that it would hurt. 

“He can’t unlock them,” Kelly said then, looking between them. “That was the point.” 

“The _pilot_.” Talla managed to make the word sound like an insult somehow, all but spitting it out. “Where is he?” 

“Gone,” Ed told her. “You’re too late.” Those words were enough to make him feel at least a little better about whatever came next. Whatever they did to him, no matter how painful, nothing could change the fact that all helm controls were locked, even to him. He found himself turning his gaze to Kelly, struck by the urge to say _I told you so_. That would have been juvenile, it wouldn’t have helped anyone in the least, but it would have been true to form for him he supposed. 

Kelly held his gaze and when she smiled what little of that urge was left crumbled away because there was something so knowing about that smile. There was something _dangerous_ there. “Are we?” 

Ed almost frowned but managed to catch himself and hold it at bay, looking across the room to Bortus and Rendell, then to Talla, and finally back at Kelly. 

She laughed. It wasn’t loud and it didn’t last long but there was definite amusement there and it was obviously at his expense. “You really believe he would just _leave_?” With a shake of her head she said, “You’re even more of a fool than I thought.” With Talla still pinning him to the wall he couldn’t back away when Kelly closed the distance between them, bringing her face right up to his as she said, “He’s a loyal little thing. He would never leave you behind.” Before he could challenge that, remind her that it had essentially been an order, she smiled anew and pressed on, “Even if you commanded it of him he would never abandon his Captain. His _friend_. After all—” She laid one hand against the wall beside his head. “What is he without you?” 

It was that _smile_. Ed couldn’t take it. When he moved it was impulsively, without thinking it through, and he should have known better. Talla had him pinned across the chest but his arms were free and he brought his right one up and grabbed at Kelly with it. He felt his fingers brush firmly against her forearm and he closed his grip as quickly as he could but she was ready for him. They both were. In an instant Talla had stepped clear to give Kelly room. With one hand in his grasp her other came up and clutched the collar of his jacket and with that grip she yanked him forward and down in the same instant that she drove one of her long legs up, bent at the knee. That knee caught him in the gut, right under the ribcage, knocking the wind out of him. It loosened his grip on her enough that she could turn the tables, and before he could recover enough to fight back she had him against the wall again, face-first this time. Her hand had locked at the back of his neck to hold him there, her other clamped around his wrist with his arm twisted up behind his own back. She pressed her weight against him so she could speak directly into his ear in a low voice, “And what are _you_ without _me_?” 

She held him there as someone laughed. Ed thought it was Talla. He kept his eyes shut because it was easier to pretend it was another voice shaping that laughter, and easier to pretend it was someone else holding him against the wall. When he tried to shift his weight his arm was jerked upward forcefully enough that there was no mistaking it for a warning: _Don’t_. Breathing raggedly Ed obeyed, trying to think, trying to push past the building sense of panic that was warring with his reason and determination. 

“So,” Talla said from somewhere nearby. “We need the pilot. And you believe he’s still on board?” 

“I know he is.” 

Ed knew it too. Deep down beneath the desperate desire to believe otherwise he felt it. Gordon hadn’t stuck to the plan and left with Claire and the kids. He would have been angry about it but he knew he would have done exactly the same thing if their positions were reversed. 

“He’ll be skulking around somewhere, keeping out of sight,” Kelly went on. Ed hated hearing those words, and that tone, coming out of her mouth. He was glad Gordon couldn’t hear her. The other man would have understood it wasn’t really Kelly but that didn’t make it any less painful. Even Ed himself was struggling with it. “But we can coax him out of hiding.” 

The intrigue in Talla’s voice was unnerving. “Oh?” 

Kelly yanked back on Ed’s collar so suddenly that it almost choked him, pulling him roughly away from the wall but keeping him close, her grip never loosening for a moment. She had turned him to face Talla who was smiling at him as she nodded her head. “Well, Captain,” the Xelayan said with confidence. “It seems I have no choice but to exercise Directive Thirty-Eight.” 

The bottom of his stomach threatened to drop out again. Ed struggled with a renewed sense of purpose, understanding those words and that smile and what they meant to do, knowing that he had to do everything in his power to stop them. Even if it cost him his life he had to stop them. 

With a laugh Talla stepped towards him and he had just enough time to regret not lunging for that computer when he’d had the chance before she hit him again. _Hard_.


	15. Between a Rock and a Hard Place

“Okay, kids.” Claire tapped at the helm controls, calling to mind every lesson she had ever taken when it came to piloting as she moved the shuttle into position. “I need you to listen to me very carefully.” She kept her eyes on the movements of her fingers, not wanting to miss a thing as the shuttle continued to pivot and reverse. “You’re all going to stay right here while I head over to the ship, all right?” Before Marcus could even finish forming whatever argument she knew he was about to offer she went on, “It’s not safe over there, and I need to be quick. I won’t be gone long and as soon as I’m back we’ll need to leave.” It was safe to look away from the console now. She turned her gaze to her oldest son. “Do you understand me?” 

For a moment Marcus hesitated, watching her, obviously searching her face for any wiggle room. She wasn’t going to give him any. When she lifted her brows in a prompt he nodded his head. “Okay, Mom.” 

The shuttle docked, shuddering lightly before going still, and only then did she turn in her seat to look at Ty, who nodded, and finally Topa. The Moclan boy nodded his head as well. “Good,” she said. “Good boys.” With that she slipped from her seat, striding to the back of the shuttle. From the panel in its floor she removed two PM-44s, keeping one for herself and heading back to the front of the shuttle to give one to Marcus. “Remember,” she said to him, and the two younger boys as well, “stay right here. I’ll be back soon.” She didn’t need to tell Marcus to watch over Ty and Topa, she saw the understanding in his eyes as he took the weapon from her, and she gave him a nod before turning to leave. 

Ty caught her hand on her way past him. “Momma?” As soon as she looked down at him he said, almost pleadingly, “Be careful.” 

“I will, sweetie.” She gave him a smile and squeezed his hand. It was only when Ty released his hold on her first that she stepped away, letting herself out of the shuttle and being sure to close the door behind her. 

Claire retrieved her comscanner and flicked it open, using the light to guide her way as well as following the readings on its screen after taking a moment to search for what she needed in the information they had retrieved from earlier visits. It wasn’t far, from the looks of it, and she wanted to spend as little time here as possible, but she would tread carefully all the same. The ship had been cleared by the teams who had come across but they hadn’t known then what they knew now. Claire was armed with a greater amount of knowledge, and therefore caution. 

She listened for any unusual sounds as she moved through the corridors but all she could hear were the usual small noises a ship made even when it was powered down to the bare minimum as this one was. After spending as much time as she had in space she was more than accustomed to such things but even she had to admit this place was unnerving. She scanned the ground for anything that didn’t belong and made sure to get a good look around corners before stepping clear of them and into the open. 

By the time she reached her destination she estimated she had been gone almost ten minutes already. Tapping the right button on her comscanner she signalled the shuttle, waiting with bated breath for the response. 

“We’re okay, Mom.” 

As soon as she heard Marcus’ voice she let out the breath she had been holding, nodding to herself as she stood looking at the barrier before her. “It won’t be long now. Hold tight.” They acknowledged and she ended the link, holding up her comscanner even though she knew she wouldn’t see anything. Sure enough the readings were unremarkable but as she lowered it and set it on the ground nearby she felt certain she was in the right place. 

That door had not been closed when they left. 

Holstering the PM-44 was the last thing she wanted to do but there was no way she was going to be able to release that door without the use of both hands. She hadn’t known there was a lock on the outside of it from the reports but she had to assume the teams who had come over had been more occupied with the room’s interior than anything else. That was her hope at least. 

The locking mechanism was rough under her hands and unmoving at first, it didn’t even so much as creak and she felt her frustration building. “Come on, you son of a bitch,” she all but growled at it, shifting her grip and redoubling her efforts. 

There was a creak, a groan, and then a _thunk_. The whole thing shifted under her hands, the rough surface scraping against her palms. Claire gasped in surprise more than anything else and stared at the thing for a moment before she reminded herself that she wasn’t done yet. She went at it again, putting her back into it this time, shoving and heaving the thing until it turned in a full rotation with an almighty grinding sound. 

When the door released it was almost suddenly that it did so, a jarring enough motion that she stumbled and would have toppled right over the threshold if something had not caught her arm. She gasped again, reaching hurriedly for her weapon until a voice stopped her. 

“There is no need to be alarmed, Doctor Finn.” 

Her heart just about leapt into her throat. “ _Isaac_!” It was all she could do not to throw herself at him. “Oh my God. You’ve been here this entire time?” 

“Claire?” Another voice from the darkness of the room stopped her short and as she watched a gelatinous figure moved forward into what little light was cast from her side of the threshold. 

“ _Yaphit_?” 

“Yeah, I—wait.” He had obviously picked up on the surprise in her voice. “You guys knew I was missing too, right?” 

There was no time for this. “My boys are on the shuttle. Topa too. We need to get out of here.” Yaphit could feel sorry for himself later. Right now they had much bigger concerns. As she stepped back from the doorway and recovered her comscanner from the ground she said to them, “We have a serious situation on the _Orville_.” 

“What kind of situation, Doctor?” 

Claire glanced back at Isaac over her shoulder, even as she got them underway back to the docking port. “An incursion.” 

 

* * *

 

It had been a hard enough hit to knock the human down but not so hard that they would be out for long. Checking the strength in this body was difficult but enough time had passed that they knew they hadn’t done any permanent damage. _Some_ damage, very likely, but they wouldn’t die. That was good enough for now. 

“Do we have the bridge?” 

The one who was Second Officer dipped their head. “Yes. Almost.” 

“Almost?” 

“There is one. We have not been able to catch them alone.” 

Making a low sound in the female’s throat they gestured to the downed human, hearing them groan weakly as the Second Officer took a rough but tight hold on them and proceeded to drag them out of the room as they exited. It was a short distance to the bridge and those within turned to watch their approach. Most did not react beyond the faintest of acknowledgements. That was good. 

There was one, however, sitting in the navigator’s seat. That one reacted, not when they approached but when they caught sight of the downed human being dragged in their wake. 

“Captain?” They rose from their seat and stepped clear of their station. 

There was no need to hide the sigh that slipped out. Ideally there would have been no one like this left behind but they had had to take things more slowly this time. It had been a disaster before. Too fast, too hard, sloppy and desperate. A mess, plain and simple. 

“What’s going on? Commander?” They were looking to the Second Officer, confusion plain on their face. It was a fairly young female, with pale hair and eyes. Another human. There was a building conviction in their eyes as they looked around at the other figures present. “Lieutenant Keyali?” 

The downed human was coming around already. They were making low sounds of struggle as consciousness returned. Impressive. They were stronger than they looked. 

“Ensign—” The Second Officer silenced the human with a rough jerk on the collar in his grasp. 

When the young female moved forward in response to that declaration of their rank they found themselves caught in a firm grip. Their neck was just as slender as the rest of them, it fit so neatly in the palm. Instantly they jerked to a halt, breath catching, and grasped at the arm holding them. That might have been the end of it if the female had not tapped the comm on their sleeve, obviously thinking to call for help. 

They couldn’t have that. 

Even as they turned the head of the one called Talla to watch the human male’s face with her pale eyes they used her powerful hand to squeeze and then _crush_. 

 

* * *

 

“ _NO_!” It was already too late. Much too late. 

Ed fought anyway, his head pounding and his stomach churning, struggling madly in Bortus’ grip as he watched the fingers of Talla’s hand clench inward. Flesh tore as fingernails punctured and an artery gave way under the fearsome strength of the Xelayan’s assault, simple though it was. Blood burst free in a violent rush and the Ensign let out a wet and ragged choking sound. She clawed frantically, futilely, at Talla’s arm and then at her own ruined throat as the blood came pouring out, streaming down her uniform and spattering the carpet around her feet. 

With a shapeless yell Ed shoved his own body weight to the side and into Bortus’ legs, destabilising the Moclan enough to wrench free of his grasp. There was nothing he could do for the Ensign but he bolted towards her anyway, defying the dizziness that came over him as he demanded too much of his body too soon after the blow Talla had landed on him so recently. Adrenaline was pulsing through him fiercely enough to give him the strength he needed to cover the distance. 

Talla was still watching him as he ran towards her and the dying officer in her grasp. When she released the Ensign, letting the body crumple to the ground, she did it so unceremoniously that it was almost indifferent. Ed half expected her to intercept him but she let him go to the woman on the ground. She knew there was nothing he could do. That was why. Ed knew that but he did exactly what they expected of him anyway because doing anything less felt wrong. His hands went instantly to the Ensign’s throat as she wheezed and gurgled pitifully, her face ashen and her eyes already turning glassy. 

“No,” he told her even though he knew she was beyond hearing him. “No, no, _don’t_ —dammit, don’t you _dare_.” Blood pulsed and oozed between his fingers, his hands becoming slick with it within seconds, and he felt the flow slow beneath his touch as what little life had been left in the woman ebbed out of her before his eyes. When she breathed her last he heard it, the shuddering quality of it. He was looking into her eyes as she slipped away. 

It felt like he knelt there for a very long time but it was only a minute at most. Maybe not even that. Ed looked down at the dead woman and replayed her last moments in his mind. She had been about to call for help. From where he had hung from Bortus’ grasp he had seen her tap her comm. That was why the thing inside Talla had killed her. 

Ed didn’t even realise he was moving again until he was throwing a punch into the Xelayan’s face. He hadn’t expected to hit her and he didn’t like that part of him _relished_ the fact that he had. The blood on his hand left a smear across her cheek that was a stark and ugly contrast to the smirk she gave him when she lifted her head. The blow hadn’t fazed her, he knew, there was no way a human like him could have any real effect on a Xelayan like her. That didn’t stop him from swinging for her again. 

She caught his fist that time, tightening her grip on it almost immediately. Ed felt the bones in his hand straining and fought to stay on his feet as the pain intensified. It would have been so easy for her to break every single one of those bones without even having to try but she didn’t do it. She just threatened it, holding him on that precipice as his balance wavered and he dropped to one knee, fighting all the while to keep his breathing steady. 

Her other hand closed around his throat and hauled him back up so she could look him in the eye. “That,” she said, dipping her head towards the dead Ensign without ever breaking eye contact, “was your fault.” 

“Damn you,” Ed ground out, clutching at her wrist even as she kept her grip on his other hand. The pain hadn’t eased. The threat was still there. “You didn’t have to kill her.” 

“No,” she admitted, shaking her head slightly. “No, I didn’t.” She jerked him closer and smiled viciously. “But I _wanted_ to.” 

And then she dropped him. Ed was so unprepared for it that he buckled down to his knees with enough force that it actually hurt and he winced. His right hand was trembling, he realised, and though he could move it the movement was sluggish and uncomfortable. It was throbbing dully. He lifted his head and looked past Kelly’s chair to the open doors of the bridge and took a moment to chastise himself for missing the window the Ensign had given him. He had broken out of Bortus’ grasp. He should have made a break for those doors. Maybe he wouldn’t have gotten very far but he should have tried anyway. 

Ed looked back at the young woman on the floor, her blood already beginning to cool on the ground around her. He looked down at his hands then, at the blood that covered them too. He could feel it around his neck where Talla’s hand had taken hold, the same hand she had used to kill the Ensign. 

“Call your pilot.” 

He lifted his head, taking his eyes from the blood all over his hands and finding Talla standing nearby looking down at him. Setting his jaw in a simple show of defiance he said simply, “No.” 

She made a show of drawing in a breath and heaving it out in a sigh. “Call him,” she said again. “Now.” Tilting her head she added, “Or we will call him _for_ you.” 

Ed looked from Talla’s face to Bortus’, and finally Kelly’s. Everyone else was looking at him as well, he realised. It was an unsettling feeling, and the silence of them all as they watched him made the moment that much more chilling. 

“No,” he said again, bringing his gaze back to Talla. “You can go to hell.” If the Xelayan was still in there somewhere, if she could hear him, she would know he wasn’t really talking to _her_. That was the hope anyway. 

She sighed again, lifting her brows and shrugging her shoulders. “All right. We’ll do it your way.” 

Ed was too slow. Talla had hold of him again before he could even try to move out of her way and with no trouble at all she forced him down onto the floor of the bridge. He tried to push his way back up but she came down on top of him, sitting astride his back and placing one hand against his head to hold him in place, leaning down so she could speak into his ear. “Remember,” she said to him in a low voice, “you chose this.” 

She released his head only to take hold of his left arm and twist it behind his back. It was a painful enough angle that his breath caught momentarily but he steadied himself as much as possible then, trying to prepare himself without knowing what he was preparing for. 

When Talla activated a comm it was his that she used, able to do so easily with his wrist trapped in her grasp. “Keyali to Malloy.” 

Ed stayed quiet, hoping that Gordon would do the same. Wherever he was on the ship Ed hoped that he didn’t take the bait. It was a futile hope, he knew, because in his gut he knew where this was leading and that he wouldn’t have been able to stay silent in Gordon’s place. 

“Keyali to Malloy. Respond. This is your last warning.” 

Still nothing. Ed closed his eyes, keeping them that way, counting off the seconds of silence in his head. 

He had just hit seven when pain exploded through his hand and tore an immediate cry out of his throat. 

 

* * *

 

The shout was so loud and unexpected that Gordon actually started physically, knocking himself against the top of the conduit hard enough that it jarred a curse out of him. The pain of it passed in an instant, overshadowed well and truly by that cry in that all too familiar voice. No matter how much Gordon tried to tell himself he didn’t know it he did, there was no mistaking it, and for a moment he actually had to clamp a hand over his mouth to keep from uttering any further sounds of his own. 

Dammit, dammit, _dammit_. 

“Malloy. Answer your damn comm. _Now_.” 

Beyond those words Gordon could hear what he thought was ragged breathing. After a few seconds that ragged breathing became another cry. 

What little resolve he had been holding together came crashing down and he tapped his own comm as swiftly as he could. “Malloy here.” 

The cry eased off and was drowned out by Talla’s voice shortly after, “ _That’s_ more like it.” After a moment she added, “Was that really so hard?” 

“What do you want?” Gordon wasn’t in the mood for whatever games these things felt like playing. They had Ed and they were doing God knew what to him. If Gordon could stop that then that was what he was going to do. That was what he _had_ to do. 

“What, no small talk?” 

“What do you _want_?” 

If Gordon didn’t know better he could have sworn she laughed at that. “All right. Straight to the point. I can respect that.” He heard her draw in a breath before she started to speak again, “The _Orville_ ’s helm controls are locked and I have it on good authority that you’re the only one who can release them.” 

Had Ed told her? Possibly. He had been under the impression that Gordon had been on that shuttle with the Doc’ and the kids. That had been the plan as well but Gordon hadn’t been able to go through with it. At the last moment he had unlocked the shuttle for Doctor Finn and told her to cloak it as soon as she and the kids were clear of the ship. He had told her that she should stick close but stay cloaked until she heard from Ed that it was safe to come back. Gordon hadn’t felt like he could leave, not with Ed and Kelly running around fending off who knew how many alien parasites. For all they knew the rest of the crew had been infected. In his gut Gordon had known that staying was the right thing to do. 

Now he wasn’t so sure. Had he made the wrong choice? 

“You’re going to come up to the bridge and unlock the helm for us.” 

Gordon wished he had something to drink. His mouth was suddenly incredibly dry. 

“Gordon, _don’t_ —” Ed’s words cut off in a sudden and sharp shout of pain. 

“ _Hey_!” He was already on the move, all but scrambling back the way he had come to climb back out of the conduit in which he had been concealing himself. It was a fairly tight space but it was large enough for a maintenance crew to get down if they needed to. “Whatever you’re doing to him just _stop_ , or I’m not coming.” It was a bold claim, and maybe not the smartest one either, but Gordon didn’t know what else to do and he couldn’t stand listening to them hurting Ed without at least trying to put an end to it. 

“If you don’t come up here, and quickly,” Talla said, and she spoke in the darkest tone he had ever heard her use, “I’m going to break every single bone in his body, one at a time.” 

Gordon was halfway out of the conduit’s mouth when she said that and the threat was so chilling that it actually froze him in place. For just a moment he felt sick, hating that he imagined the awful sounds of all those bones being broken, and just how agonising it would be. Awkwardly he finished scrambling out of the conduit and held a hand to his mouth again, needing a moment to just breathe. 

“Malloy?” 

“All right.” He tried not to hear how much his voice was shaking when he responded but something told him it was obvious to anyone listening. “All right, I’m coming.” 

What else could he do? 

“You have five minutes.” 

Gordon heard the line cut out and was beyond grateful for it. It allowed him to let out a shuddering and thoroughly nauseated sigh without having to worry about those things overhearing him and taking pleasure in it. Five minutes. He covered his face with his hands and let out another one of those sighs, this one trailing off into a groan. When he took his hands from his face he started muttering to himself. “Okay, okay, all right. All right, Malloy, you can do this.” 

Five minutes. 

He could do this. 

“Okay, Malloy.” A deep breath, steadying and bracing. He nodded his head. “Move your ass.” And then he pushed himself up from the ground.


	16. Windows

“Do you think it’ll work?” Claire didn’t like to doubt herself but there were times when it was far more sensible to ask for a second opinion. This certainly qualified. She looked across the helm at Isaac as the Kaylon examined her calculations and equations, as well as the commands that went behind them. There was no expression on what passed for his face but she thought she could see him working through the data all the same. There was something about the very slight inclination of his head that told her he was examining and cross-examining that data, all at a much faster rate than any biological mind could process. 

“Affirmative, Doctor,” he said at last. “However,” he amended, raising one hand in the process, “I have identified a number of imperfections in the base code that may prevent the sequence from reaching completion.” Turning his head towards her he said, “I can correct this, if you wish?” 

With an emphatic nod she said, “Yes, of course. Do it as quickly as you can.” 

“Very well, Doctor.” And then he went to work, his hands moving across the shuttle’s console swiftly and smoothly. 

Claire hadn’t even known the program she had worked into the _Orville_ ’s computer could be remotely accessed but as soon as she had mentioned it to Isaac he had requested its designation and called it up in the shuttle. The things that he was capable of never ceased to amaze her. It was just a shame that those things were not always _good_ things. 

She turned in her seat and looked back at the kids who were all sitting quietly watching what was going on. Yaphit was in the rear of the shuttle keeping an eye on things from a distance. Claire had never known him to be so quiet but after Isaac had taken it upon himself to ask the Gelatinous Lieutenant to remain silent he hadn’t uttered so much as a peep. 

“The process will take some time,” Isaac informed her after a few minutes of quiet in which he never ceased working. Even as he spoke he didn’t so much as glance up from the console. 

“All right.” She looked out of the viewer at the _Orville_ sitting ahead of them, at enough of a distance that it fit in the viewer in its entirety. It looked strange when it wasn’t moving, she realised. It almost looked artificial somehow. “How long?” Isaac wouldn’t mind if she watched him work. It was less unsettling than staring at a motionless _Orville_. 

“Approximately thirteen minutes, Doctor.” He didn’t see the way her eyes widened. “I will complete the process as quickly as I can.” 

She hoped so. There were a lot of people counting on it. 

 

* * *

 

Less than one minute. In the end he had to run, breaking into a sprint that carried him down the last corridor and to the foot of the spiral staircase leading up to Deck A and his final destination. The fact that not a single person interfered with his passage didn’t occur to him in the slightest until he was almost to the top of that staircase and by then he was beyond caring about the implications of such a thing. All that mattered was getting to the bridge before his time ran out. 

Ten seconds. 

He cleared the top of the climb and rounded the corner as quickly as he could without losing his balance, fixing his gaze on the opening to the bridge. The doors were open. Thank God for that. Gordon wouldn’t have wanted to waste precious moments of what little time he had left waiting for them to part. 

The sight of Bortus watching him approach was surprising and unsettling enough that he almost stumbled, managing to catch himself by sheer force of will alone, slowing from a sprint to a jog and then a walk, ignoring the fact that he was more than a little out of breath. It was almost impossible to break eye contact with Bortus but a glimpse of a second flash of blue out of the corner of his field of vision did the trick nicely. 

When he saw Kelly standing in front of the command chairs he felt his blood run cold. All it took was a single glance and he knew it wasn’t her, just as it wasn’t Bortus. Not really. Neither one of them was in control right now. They both had one of those things inside them. 

Swallowing against the dryness in his throat he broke his gaze away from Kelly’s face and looked around. He couldn’t see Ed. Reining in any panic that might have been threatening to rise he summoned his courage and strode onto the bridge, knowing deep down that he was playing right into these things’ hands but also that he didn’t have much in the way of options. They had stripped all of those away the second they had gotten their hands on Ed and recognised that they could use him as leverage. 

If their positions were reversed Gordon knew Ed would have done exactly the same thing. That didn’t do much to make him feel better about any of this but it was something. Better than nothing. 

He just hoped he could pull this off. 

When no one challenged him in any way he kept moving onto the bridge, walking past the rearmost consoles on Ed’s side, and coming up to the right of his seat. It was then that he caught sight of his friend, on his knees right in front of the chair, his face bruised and bloody enough to make it obvious that he’d already taken a beating. Sitting in the chair itself was Talla. In her hand was a large knife. The blade was to Ed’s throat. Gordon noted that Ed didn’t dare move his head but he followed him with his eyes as much as he could. Talla was watching him like a hawk the entire time, from the moment he stepped into view. The steady focus of her gaze was enough to send a chill racing down his spine. 

“Lieutenant Malloy,” she greeted him. “With, what?” She glanced to Kelly. “Five seconds to spare?” She turned her eyes back to him. “Cutting it close, don’t you think?” With a glance down to Ed in front of her she let out a little laugh. “No pun intended.” 

Gordon’s throat was almost painfully dry now. It took him a moment to actually find his voice, it was so dry. “Let him go.” He didn’t sound nearly as brave as he had hoped he might. 

Talla’s eyes narrowed. “No,” she said slowly, “I don’t think so.” She actually tightened her grip on Ed, forcing him to tilt his head back as the blade pressed more firmly against his throat. She raised her brows, watching Gordon levelly as she said, “Unlock the helm controls.” 

Gordon hated the sight of that blade so close to Ed’s throat. Just the slightest application of pressure and surely it would break the skin. _No_. Gordon pulled down a breath, forcing himself to think instead of just reacting. Talla’s threat didn’t make any sense. “Not until you let him go.” His voice was steadier then, calmer, with less of a tremor. 

The Xelayan’s expression darkened and she used the flat of the blade against the underside of Ed’s jaw to force his head back even further. The other man grimaced and Gordon saw his friend’s balance waver. 

“Stop,” he forced out, finally finding and latching on to that courage he had been trying to gather together the entire way up from the lower decks of the ship. “You’re not going to kill him.” When Talla fixed him with an unwavering stare he recognised the challenge there and managed not to shy away. “You obviously know you can’t infect him, or me, and if you were going to kill him you’d have done it by now.” Ed was watching him as much as he could with his head forced back the way it was but Gordon kept his eyes on Talla. If he didn’t he worried he might lose his hold on that courage and he couldn’t afford that right now. Neither could Ed. “But you haven’t, and that means you need him. And if you need him, then you need him _alive_.” Gordon straightened, standing at his full height now. It wasn’t impressive, he was fairly certain he was the shortest person in the room and far from physically imposing as a result, but it would send a clear message anyway, especially if these things could be as primal as the Doc’ suggested. “So you might as well drop the knife.” 

For several seconds no one said anything or moved so much as a muscle. It felt like everyone present was holding their breath. Gordon knew he was, certainly, as he watched Talla’s face and waited, with no small amount of dread, for something to happen. 

When she smiled it caught him off guard. She actually laughed a little, softly, and tipped her head a fraction to the side. “Ballsy,” she said to him, and then she nodded her head. “And a hell of a gamble.” Her smile widened, but there was something dangerous in that smile that made Gordon wonder if he had made a mistake. “But you’re right,” she said, practically as an announcement, bringing the knife away from Ed’s throat and allowing the other man to drop his head forward. Gordon heard him pull in a sudden breath, equal parts relief and frantic need, as if the pressure had been keeping him from doing so. Their eyes met and there was gratitude and fear there, as well as regret and desperation, all warring for priority. 

“I’m not going to kill him,” Talla said, even as she tossed the knife through the air, off towards the Science and Engineering stations. Gordon flinched despite himself and turned his head to watch Lieutenant Rendell snatch the blade out of the air in a flawless catch that would have put many Earth athletes to shame. “But _this_ won’t kill him.” Those words brought Gordon’s attention back to Talla in an instant. She was already rising from the captain’s chair. While Gordon’s head had been turned she had taken hold of Ed’s left wrist and brought her right leg up to drive her knee into the space between his shoulders. With her knee she forced his body forward and down while she used her grip on his wrist to twist his arm up and back. The angle was _wrong_ and Gordon recognised after only a moment what she was intending to do. 

She was going to forcefully dislocate Ed’s shoulder. Given her strength and the violent angle of her attack she would probably break his arm as well, possibly in more than one place. Hell, if she wasn’t careful she could probably rip the limb clean off. 

Ed’s face was a mask of agony and Gordon could see he was gritting his teeth against the pain until he couldn’t bear it anymore. When he voiced it the sound was raw and ragged and cut through Gordon like the blade of that knife in Rendell’s hand. Kelly was blocking his path before he could move more than a couple of feet in his friend’s direction and he realised he must have raised his voice in a shout when he saw Talla looking his way. She didn’t let up on the pressure for so much as a second. 

Gordon felt like he had forgotten how to breathe. His heartbeat was a deafening thunder in his skull and his blood was pounding in his ears so loud he felt deaf to everything else. _Almost_ everything. Ed unleashed another agonised cry then and the world snapped back into horrendous focus. 

“Okay, _STOP_! Stop! I’ll do it!” Kelly was actually holding him back now. When had he rushed forward? “Just _stop_ ,” he said, holding a hand out past Kelly to try and keep Talla’s attention well and truly on him. “Stop, _please_.” She raised her eyebrows at him. Waiting. “I’ll do it. I will. I swear.” 

Silently she held his gaze for a few moments and then she released Ed’s arm. Gordon watched as his friend buckled forward and practically all the way down to the ground, trying in vain to cradle the arm close to himself as he gasped loudly and roughly, fighting to catch his breath. It was as he was watching him then that Gordon got his first good look at the other man’s left hand. It was darkly mottled with bruising that was already turning ugly shades of blue and yellow and at least two of the fingers looked oddly crooked. 

Not crooked, Gordon realised as a knot formed in his stomach. _Broken_. 

He lifted his gaze to Talla as the Xelayan straightened. Wordlessly she gestured to the helm with a nod of her head. Kelly had released her grip on him as well, stepping back but keeping her eyes on him. 

“Gordon—” Ed’s voice was strained, an obvious struggle, his breathing awkward and uneven, “— _don’t_.” 

Gordon wiped a hand over his mouth, trying not to look down at Ed as the other man struggled to push his way back to his knees. As he managed to straighten enough to bring his head up Ed used his right hand to hold his left arm close to his body, the best protective measure he could take in that moment. How much pain was he in? How much was it costing him to fight it? 

There was no way to know the answer to either of those questions. 

“Malloy.” Talla’s voice was low. A warning. She was looming right behind Ed, well within striking distance. 

Gordon just had to hope Ed could hold out. “Okay,” he said, nodding, turning and moving towards the helm, noticing that all eyes were on him as he did so. It was unsettling but if they were watching him then that might give them an edge. “Hey, Ed,” he went on as he approached the helm, half-turning to look back at the other man as he reached his station. He allowed his voice to shake audibly as he went on, hoping it would distract the others. He only needed a moment. Ed was looking at him and Gordon met his gaze as he said, one hand on the control panel, “Kinda reminds you of the _Yakar_ , huh?” 

And then he triggered the console. 

 

* * *

 

Ed only had a moment once Gordon spoke that name to realise what it meant. He almost didn’t grasp it, the moment almost slipped right through his fingers, but right as Gordon’s hand hit the console it dawned on him and he had just enough time to squeeze his eyes shut and throw his head down, tucking it into his own chest. At the last moment he brought his good arm up and over his ducked head as well, a crude shield against what was coming. 

Even taking those precautions he sensed the sudden burning blaze of every light throughout the _Orville_ ’s bridge, the intense blast of an overload that would daze and overwhelm anyone not shielding their eyes. 

_Move_. That one word seared through his brain and Ed didn’t waste any time trying to be sure of his bearings. Instead he practically threw himself to his feet and used his mental map of the bridge to get himself going in the right direction. Someone brushed him on his way, he felt their body as he hurried past them, but the shouts and yells of indignation and pain that were coming from all sides told him that Gordon’s plan had worked well enough that he had a window of opportunity. 

He had to take it. He had to get as far away from the bridge as he could. More than anything he had to get to a station, _any station_ , and trigger Claire’s program. 

Somewhere not far behind him someone was giving chase. Ed hoped it was Gordon. 

It had to be. 

 

* * *

 

Trigger the overload, count off a couple of seconds to let it take hold, and then run like hell. That had been the plan. It was a fairly crude plan but simple enough that it had a good chance of working, and who else on the bridge would know what he meant by what he had said about the _Yakar_? 

Gordon had triggered the overload and counted off a couple of seconds. He had heard yelling and shouting, curses and cries of pain and frustration. That had been good enough for him to believe it was working just the way he had hoped it would and so he had turned and started to run back the way he had come, keeping his eyes squeezed shut and his head ducked down the entire way. By this point, after serving on the _Orville_ this long, he didn’t need to see where he was going to navigate the bridge. 

He had made it about halfway when something blocked his path, a body firmly planted between him and his escape. Gordon reached out to shove the person out of his way but as he lifted his arms something in his brain told him that the action was a waste. He tried to shove but his arms didn’t seem to have much strength. He tried to step to the side and get himself clear of the barricade but he couldn’t. 

It hurt to try. 

The overload timed out, only a short surge really, and the lighting returned to normal. Gordon opened his eyes, blinking away the worst of the white haze across his field of vision. 

Rendell was standing in front of him. Her eyes were bloodshot and obviously strained and there was an angry reddening to her skin that Gordon recognised. She was scowling at him. She was awfully close to him as well, he realised. 

Something in his stomach felt tight. Gordon lowered his head and dropped his gaze and understood why. His mouth opened but no sound came out, his bottom jaw still dropped as he brought his face up to Rendell’s again. As their eyes met she pulled back, stepping away, lowering her arm to her side, bloody knife and all. 

The pain hit him then and he instinctively raised a hand to press to his stomach. With nothing stemming the flow blood was pulsing free and it seeped through the spaces between his fingers. With a gasp he realised he had dropped to his knees. Had he cried out? He must have. Gordon couldn’t remember hearing the sound of his own voice but there was no way he hadn’t. The pain was too intense. 

Ed was gone. Gordon could tell that much with a single glance. Good. That was good. 

He frowned in the moments before he buckled backwards and collapsed to the ground. Talla was there, and Bortus too, along with all the others. 

All except Kelly. 

Ed was gone and so was Kelly. 

_Oh no_. Gordon had just enough time for that thought to pass through his mind before everything went black.


	17. The Red Line

With a snarl they crossed the bridge and took the female called Rendell by the throat, yanking them in close and making sure they could see the rage across their host’s face. Instantly the hostility went out of the face of the other and there was a light thump as the bloodied weapon was dropped to the ground. 

“ _Idiot_ ,” they snarled at their progeny, a foolish and impulsive thing that had already cost them so much by this point. Reckless and thoughtless they had tripped and stumbled more than once and now here they were so close to getting what they needed and yet at the same time so close to complete and utter failure. “We _needed_ the pilot.” 

The man was down on the ground, alive but obviously unconscious, a dark stain spreading across the front of his jacket as blood ebbed free of the wound. Without him they were stuck here, drifting just as they had been on the last ship. Not even the leader of this vessel could get them moving again. 

Rendell’s lips moved uselessly as they tried to respond, to apologise and grovel and plead for forgiveness. But it was too late for that. Much too late. 

With a powerful wrench of one arm they sent their progeny and the body it had seized hurtling across the bridge but they didn’t even watch as it collided violently with the stations on the other side of the room. They heard the crash and the thud as it toppled to the ground but already they were focusing on the one called Bortus. 

“Find them,” they said. The one called Kelly had disappeared when the leader had. They had given chase, most likely. That was good. “Find them and bring him back to me.” 

The look on the other’s face told them that they understood there was no need for the human male to be in one piece when they did so. 

 

* * *

 

His lungs were burning and the muscles in his legs were screaming but he couldn’t afford to slow down, let alone stop. It was only when he somehow managed to get to the bottom of the staircase and look back to try and find that flash of dark orange uniform jacket that he realised it wasn’t Gordon hot on his heels at all. It was Kelly, or more to the point it was the thing in control of her, and he saw enough of her stormy expression to know he had to just keep running. He had to get somewhere safe and seal himself inside and hope to hell that Talla didn’t come along and rip the doors open like they were made of tissue paper. 

If Gordon wasn’t right behind him then where _was_ he? Ed couldn’t get that question, and the fear that went along with it, out of his mind as he broke into as rapid a sprint down the corridor as he could manage. Gordon had triggered the overload which meant he had known exactly how long the flare would last. He should have had plenty of time and opportunity to get clear as well. The fact that he wasn’t right there at Ed’s back meant something had gone wrong. 

Something had happened to Gordon. 

The sound of Kelly’s swift footfalls following in his wake reminded him harshly that there was no time to panic and there was nothing he could do. If he didn’t get somewhere safe and finish this then they were all as good as dead. Ed had no doubt that they wouldn’t hesitate to kill him once they had everything they needed from him, and Gordon too. If those things couldn’t infect either one of them then there was no reason to keep them alive once they had complete control of the _Orville_. They might need Ed longer than they would need Gordon but— 

It didn’t even bear thinking about. Ed didn’t have time for it. He didn’t have room for it in his brain. 

He was just about to round the next corner and dart into the closest room when Kelly hit him from behind and drove him bodily into the wall. His right shoulder took the brunt of the impact and he yelled as much in frustration as he did from the pain of it, feeling her hands clamping on to him to try and drive him down to the ground. Without thinking about how much it was going to hurt he threw his weight back and directly into her, forcing her off balance and down onto the ground. He heard the air go rushing out of her as he came down on top of her and managed to use his own momentum to carry himself back and over her in a sloppy and awkward roll. Ed had meant to roll on his shoulder and come up in a crouch but he ended up rolling off onto his side onto the ground in a heap instead. It didn’t matter. Kelly was dazed and winded enough that he had just enough time to scramble back to his feet and throw himself forward into a run again. Just as his foot lifted from the ground Kelly’s hand thudded down where it had been, grasping nothing but air, and she let out an angry shout. 

Ed didn’t look back. His skull felt like it was going to split, he couldn’t feel much of anything in his left arm besides a white-hot pulse of agony, and he was fairly sure that the second he stopped he would just black out but he had to _move_. 

But damn it all to hell Kelly Grayson was so _fast_. She was thundering up behind him before he had gained more than ten feet in ground. Without thinking about where he was going to end up he cut suddenly to the right and as a pair of doors hissed open he went through them, turning quickly to try and lock the room behind him. 

He wasn’t quick enough. 

Kelly came barrelling through before the doors could close all the way, the damned safety features aboard the _Orville_ actually working against him when they registered a body in their path and slowed enough for her to slip through. Ed turned as she came through but not quite in time to duck below the elbow she sent hurtling towards his face. It caught him across the temple and bounced his head off the wall and he had buckled halfway to the ground, stunned, before he could catch himself. For a few seconds all he saw were stars but even as he was blinking them back he was taking action and trying to think at least one step ahead. 

Much, _much_ easier said than done. 

When he tackled Kelly around the waist and drove her back he rammed her right into the central console of Isaac’s lab. He felt the shock of the impact through her athletic frame moments before she hit him with her elbow again, this time between the shoulder blades, driving him down towards the ground. Close to her legs. Far too close. When she brought her knee up it brushed dangerously close to his head, he felt the material of her pants graze over his ear and threw himself to the side in a desperate attempt to get clear of her long limbs and all the power and skill she had to put behind them. 

There was just enough space between them that Ed could get back to his feet as she collected herself and turned to face him. As he gasped raggedly and fought obviously for every breath hers were controlled and even, albeit deeper than normal. There was a dark determination to her expression that he hardly recognised. Even in her most aggressive moments he hadn’t seen so much savagery on her face, in her eyes especially. She looked half-wild. 

“Dammit, Kel,” he panted, shaking his head. The throbbing in his skull picked up for a second before adrenaline did a fine job of numbing it enough again that he could continue to function. “Don’t do this.” 

Kelly Grayson was a runner but she was also a fighter. She was fierce and fearless and formidable, a hell of an opponent, and not one most people would like to face once they figured out exactly what she was capable of. Ed had thought countless times over the course of their relationship, and since, that he would never want to get on her bad side because there was no way in hell that he could beat her. They were a great team, they had served together long enough by now that he felt he could say that without any sense of misplaced arrogance, but Ed felt no shame in admitting that she was the real heavyweight of the two of them. He had more literal weight to throw around but Kelly? She was fast and agile and so much stronger than she looked. Tougher too. 

She stepped towards him, closing what little distance there was separating them. 

“Kelly, _dammit_.” Ed had backed up a step, realising too late he was putting his back to the wall. He held up his right hand, opening it and showing his palm to try and keep her at bay. “Stop. It’s me, it’s _Ed_.” Her Captain, her ex-husband, her good friend. “ _Please_ , Kel.” She was still coming. “ _Please_ don’t do this.” 

She stopped, her eyes fixed on his face. The only sound in the room was his ragged and hitching breathing. Kelly watched him with unblinking green eyes and Ed thought, just for a second, that maybe, just maybe, he had managed to get through to her. 

And then she brought up a leg and slammed the flat of her boot right into his stomach. 

 

* * *

 

“How much longer?” Claire took her eyes from the _Orville_ again and turned them back to Isaac. He was still moving his hands with near fluid smoothness over the console. She had always rather enjoying watching him work. There was something so graceful about the movements, almost artful. It was difficult to enjoy something so simple when there was so much at stake though and all she could think of right then were the kids in the shuttle behind her and the rest of the crew on the ship. The Captain, Commander Grayson, Lieutenant Malloy, each and every one of them depending on her and that program she had loaded into the ship’s computer before her departure. 

Learning that there were imperfections in the command code did not surprise her, she was a medical doctor after all and not any sort of engineer or programmer, but it _had_ disappointed and unsettled her. The others back on the _Orville_ were counting on her and she couldn’t let them down. God only knew what was happening on the ship right at that moment and all she could do was sit and watch the Kaylon beside her work silently and smoothly, trying to fix what she had constructed incorrectly in the first place. 

“Approximately six minutes, Doctor.” 

“Six minutes?” She heard the frustration in her own voice. 

“Yes, Doctor. I am working as quickly as possible to correct the mistakes.” 

Mistakes _she_ had made. Claire bit her tongue. 

When Yaphit spoke up from the rear of the shuttle Claire almost jolted in her seat. He had been so quiet for so long that she had actually forgotten he was there. “So did you guys deal with Bortus and Talla?” 

With a frown she twisted in her seat to look back at him. Topa looked back at the Lieutenant as well. “What do you mean?” she asked but she had a sinking feeling in her stomach that told her she already knew what Yaphit meant. 

“Well they’re the ones who shoved us in that room. You _did_ know that, right? That’s why you came over there.” He shuffled forward. “Isn’t it?” 

Claire looked to Topa, unable to gauge much on the young Moclan’s face beyond mild bewilderment and concern, and then glanced to her own kids. They appeared just as disconcerted as she felt on the inside. 

Yaphit read the silence correctly. “Oh.” A little awkwardly he shuffled backwards, closer to the rear of the shuttle again. “Right. Well.” Yaphit didn’t have a throat to clear but he made the sound anyway. “Good luck to whoever’s dealing with _those_ guys then.” 

Turning her eyes back to Isaac’s hands as he continued to work Claire tried not to imagine those she had left behind going toe to toe with a Moclan or a Xelayan. Or, God forbid, both at the same time. 

 

* * *

 

Something in his rib cage had just cracked. Ed was sure of it. Suddenly it hurt to breathe and when he twisted on the ground to try and get back to his feet there was a disconcerting burning through his chest as his body tried to warn him against the motion. 

After kicking him back into the wall Kelly had thrown a dizzying punch into his face before yanking him forward by his jacket. He had expected her to knee him in the gut again but she had used Isaac’s work station instead, ramming Ed into _that_ and letting him bounce off it and down to the ground, unable to breathe. Something had definitely cracked. His rib cage had hit the station at just the right point, or rather the _wrong_ point, and something had given way. 

When he coughed as he rolled over it was like he’d swallowed fire. He felt like he was going to heave on the carpet. His eyes were watering. But Ed pushed up and fought to get back to his feet. 

Kelly’s foot smashed into his stomach and threw him across the room. With a bark of a pained cough that cut off in a shuddering groan Ed ended up on his back looking up at the ceiling, desperately trying to make the wavering circle of lights coalesce into a single lamp like he knew it should be. The whole world was threatening to spin nauseatingly on its axis and Ed knew where that would lead. If he didn’t fight with every scrap of strength he had left then he was going to go down and _stay_ there. And he couldn’t let that happen. 

There was a station so close to him it was almost maddeningly frustrating. Ed had been bounced off the damn thing less than a minute ago. All he had to do was get to it and trigger the program and he could save the ship and everyone on board. 

He could save Kelly. 

Kelly, who was stalking towards him again, even as he thought about how desperately he wanted to save her, how desperately he _needed_ to do so. 

Kelly, who was trying to beat him half to death. 

_Kelly_. Looking at her with that thing holding the reins and making all the decisions in her body and mind was more agonising than any physical blow she could land. Even as he tasted blood on his tongue he could think of nothing more important than saving her and the rest of the crew. 

But in order to do that he had to survive her. He had to _beat_ her. 

She had come close enough to lift a boot in the beginnings of another crude attack but Ed made himself move before she could bring it crashing down. Every moment of it was agony but he bit and ground and swallowed it all down as best he could as he rolled himself forcefully back towards her. He hit her legs and sent her toppling forward, down to her knees. With one arm he caught at the edge of Isaac’s work station and hauled himself up as quickly as he could, reaching for the controls even as he was raising his voice to command roughly, “Initiate Environmental Program—” 

Kelly had tackled him again, hitting him side-on and driving him across the room and back down to the ground. She came down on top of him this time, all animal fury and violent desire. 

_It’s not her_. 

But he couldn’t look at her face and see anyone else. “God _dammit_ , Kelly.” 

And then he hit her. 

Square in the face with as hard a punch as he could throw with his back pressed to the ground, Ed hit her and hated himself for it even as he told himself she would want him to do it. Kelly wouldn’t want him to let her do what that thing was making her do. Ed knew that as surely as he knew his own name but that didn’t make it any easier to watch the way her head snapped back from the force of the blow, her hair flying and blood streaming from her nose. 

The blow had dazed her enough that he had both the time and the opportunity to hit her again, another punch but across her face from one side this time rather than dead-on. It unbalanced her enough that he could pitch his weight over and throw her off. This time when he used the work station to heave himself up he turned to face her immediately. She was already rising to her feet again. 

Her breathing was a little more ragged now and the blood from her nose had smeared her lips and stained her teeth. She hadn’t bothered to try and wipe it away. It made her look even more vicious and aggressive than before. It made her look even less like Kelly. 

That helped. 

When she surged towards him then he was ready for her, stepping forward and to the side enough to bring a leg up and into her stomach before she could halt her own forward momentum. The blow met her with enough force that she doubled over but even as Ed was bringing himself around to throw a blow down towards the back of her head he felt her grab his leg. One hand caught around his ankle and she brought her other up under his thigh and _heaved_. Ed couldn’t stop himself from losing his balance, he was poised on one foot in the wrong way, and when he went down he was a hair’s breadth away from cracking the back of his skull open on the edge of the central station. His shoulder blades slammed into the side of the station instead and he almost missed Kelly’s arm rearing back for a strike. She had gone down as well but she had managed to control her landing enough so that she wasn’t sprawled like he was. Her hand was balled into a fist and Ed realised with alarm that she was aiming the blow not for his face but for his knee. She still had hold of his ankle. 

Ed rolled again, not towards her this time but away, using her grip on his ankle to yank her with him and off balance. She gave an undignified yell that cut off in a growl of a sound as she lost her grip, lunging for him as he scrambled out of her way. Blindly he lashed out behind him with one boot and grimaced when he felt it collide with something solid, eliciting a grunt from his pursuer. 

He could shout to the computer, he thought, try again to initiate the program, but if he didn’t get to a console in time to enter his command code then it would not only be a waste of breath but also precious time and effort. He had to make sure he had enough of a window to do both things back to back, one immediately after the other. 

Kelly was on him again before he had even managed to get halfway back to his feet, grabbing a handful of the back of his jacket down where it was loose enough for her to do so, heaving him backwards and down on top of her. They both shouted then, going down in a heap, and Ed felt a blow glance off his ribs before another caught him square in the back. Even with the pain of that he threw his elbow back, just as blind an attack as his kick had been, feeling the solid crack of it against what had to be Kelly’s skull. She grunted again and in the moment when her grip slipped he turned awkwardly on top of her and hit her in the face again, trying to land a hard enough blow to at least stun her. 

For several seconds he thought it had worked and he actually staggered backwards and away from her, her assault ceasing long enough that he believed he had finally made a dent in her considerable resolve. Ed all but fell to his feet, toppling against the station and using its support to shove his aching body up, struggling to get his feet under him. “Initiate—” His voice caught, a foul metallic taste sticking at the back of his throat, and he had to cough to clear it. When he started again his gasps and pants fractured his words, every one fighting him on the way out. “Initiate E-environmental Program F-Finn—” 

He had stupidly taken his eyes off Kelly just long enough for her to pull herself up at the station to the side of the room. Various pieces of equipment had been arranged neatly across its surface, several of which had already been scattered messily by the fight. Some had remained on their perches though and it was one of those that Kelly seized and hurled at Ed’s head as hard as she could, forcing him to duck and cover his head with his good arm. Instinct and reflex had taken over and Ed cursed himself for it instantly. 

Kelly had been counting on that. 

She had hold of him even before he had finished ducking to protect his head, getting a good enough grip on him that when she heaved and pitched her own weight she used his against him and flipped him clean over onto the ground. It was a textbook Union combat move, one Ed recognised even as it was being used against him, one he had used himself countless times in close-combat over the years. When he hit the ground it was hard enough that it jarred every inch of his body and knocked what little air there was in his lungs right out again. It took Ed a few seconds to realise he had landed on his stomach and not his back. 

It gave Kelly all the time she needed to straddle his waist from behind and land a devastating blow. 

When her fist landed it didn’t strike him in the head or even the neck but right in the shoulder, a direct slam of a strike in the back of the already severely strained joint. She knew what she was doing. Ed felt the joint give under the force of the blow and the excruciating agony of it blinded him even as it closed off his airway, the shock of it strangling him. As soon as his lungs sucked even the smallest amount of oxygen down his raw throat it was racing back out of him again in a cry that was practically a scream. 

Ed wanted to black out. He felt like a coward and loathed himself for it but in the seconds following so much pure and blinding agony he wanted to be numb to it, and everything else. For just a moment he was back on Xelaya at the mercy of the extreme gravity as it crushed the bones in his legs. 

That scream had tapered off into a strangled and shuddering groan even as Kelly eased up off his waist enough to roll him roughly onto his back. With her knees either side of his hips she stared down at him as he fought to breathe, trying not to feel the way his body started to shake as his last reserves of adrenaline threatened to slip through his fingers and abandon him completely. Ed didn’t have much left in him but he clung frantically to those wisps and threads, holding on with the desperation of a wild animal that has been cornered by a predator. 

As she loomed over him that was what Kelly looked like, her shoulders tight and heaving as she pulled down heavy breaths, her face bloody and her hair a mess, the zipper of her jacket ripped out of place and the whole thing hanging at an awkward angle. 

Ed tried to form her name, he fought against the pain and the exhaustion to shape it in a voice that didn’t want to rise up his abused throat. Her expression shifted just enough that he thought he had managed, and then she brought her fist down in a brutal punch. 

She hit him in the face and the stomach and the chest, she struck him anywhere she could find an opening, the blows raining down even when he brought his right arm up to try and shield himself from her assault. She kept raining those blows down on his arm as well, trying to smash it out of her way. As soon as she could she landed another terrible blow against his shoulder. Even as he choked on the pain he told himself it wasn’t her, it wasn’t Kelly, she would never do anything like this not just to him but to _anyone_. It wasn’t her. It wasn’t. She would never. 

The doors hissed again. Ed was almost beyond hearing the sound, every inch of him hurting and burning and threatening to give out and when he coughed his ribs screamed in protest and he almost choked on the blood that tried to rush down the back of his throat. Ed didn’t know if it had come up from somewhere inside or if it was rushing into his mouth from somewhere else. 

“ _Stop_.” 

_Bortus_. It was Bortus’ voice. 

“You will kill him.” 

Kelly’s breathing was loud, her chest and shoulders heaved with it, and when she turned her head to look at Bortus in the doorway there was nothing human about it. 

“We need him alive.” 

Kelly’s weight was gone in an instant and Ed barely had it in him to feel relieved. It was nothing short of a miracle that he could hold his eyes open long enough to see Bortus just inside the doorway, facing off against his fellow infected as she turned to address him. 

Ed wanted to pass out but he couldn’t. And something, some gut instinct, told him not to give in. Not yet. 

 

* * *

 

Isaac straightened in his seat and turned his upper body towards Claire. Her heart just about leapt up her throat and out of her mouth as he said, “I have completed the adjustments. The program is now without error and will function correctly.” 

“Activate it!” As soon as the words were out of her mouth she knew it was a stupid thing to say. She felt like an idiot. 

“I cannot,” Isaac reminded her needlessly, even as she was screwing her face up into an expression of frustration not only at the situation in general but at herself. “The sequence can only be initiated by—” 

She waved her hands in the air, a hurried back and forth motion to cut him off. “The Captain, yes.” She had known that. She was the one who had written that command in to begin with. When she realised Isaac was watching her she sighed tightly and said, “It seemed like a good idea at the time.” Frowning she pressed on, “And you can’t override it?” 

“I cannot. I am afraid there is no way to circumvent the command.” Obviously he could tell she hadn’t wanted to hear that. 

Claire turned her eyes towards the ship. It still wasn’t moving. It hadn’t moved at all since she and the boys had left it. How long ago had that been now? 

“How would you like to proceed, Doctor?” 

She didn’t even turn her head to look back at the Kaylon as she answered, her voice hushed by the swell of dread in the pit of her stomach. “All we can do is wait,” she said, reaching her hand back behind her seat for either one of her boys. Both of them reached out and took hold at the same time. It helped, even if only a little. 

All they could do was wait.


	18. Down to the Wire

Black was pulsing in at the edges of his vision, each pulse creeping further inward than the last as he watched Kelly face Bortus. Any moment now they would come to some silent agreement and drag him out of there, all the way back to the bridge or the brig or wherever Talla commanded them to secure him until they were done with him. Any moment now they would turn and approach him and maybe, just maybe, he would have enough strength left in him for one last fight before the blackness took him again. 

But that wasn’t what happened. 

As he watched, shock chasing the pulses of black all the way out again, Kelly reached behind her and seized another piece of stray equipment from the bench and brought it arcing around in the air with a primal yell, putting every ounce of strength and aggression into the swing. Whatever she had grabbed was the bat and Bortus’ head was the ball and the two met in the middle with a savage _crack_ of a sound that had Ed’s whole body tensing and flinching as it filled the room. The thing in Kelly’s hands bent almost at a perfect right angle. The Moclan dropped like a stone. Ed thought he felt it when the Second Officer hit the deck. 

Kelly’s shoulders were still heaving, her breathing still a ragged rhythm fuelled by fury and God only knew what else and Ed only watched it for a second before he found it in himself to _move_. 

But he didn’t charge or tackle her, instead shoving and scrambling his battered frame back as far as he could before he reached the end of the work station, at which point he rolled over and hauled himself forward instead. He heard the sound of feral irritation and indignation when Kelly turned and realised he had scurried away from her. 

Ed didn’t stop to see where she was. With his target in sight he scrambled and clawed his way frantically forward as fast as he could, all the way around the other side of the work station and towards the lab’s entrance. 

To Bortus. 

At the last moment Ed lunged and reached out with his right arm. 

Kelly was coming around the other end of the work station when he closed his hand around his prize and he heard her suck in a breath of disbelief, the growl of “ _No_ ” slipping past her lips as she surged towards him. Ed was already twisting and rolling himself over on the ground, almost flat on his back as he brought his arm up and squeezed the trigger. The first shot from the PM-44 clipped her in the shoulder and knocked her back but not down. She turned a shocked and resentful glare his way as she fought to recover. 

“I’m sorry, Kel.” 

The second shot caught her square in the chest and drove her all the way down to the ground. Her crude weapon clattered out of her grasp and wobbled to a stop less than a foot away from her relaxed fingers. 

Ed didn’t dare to move at first, awkwardly crumpled against Bortus’ unconscious frame with the PM-44 beginning to shake in his hand. Several seconds passed in which nothing happened and then he dropped the weapon, buckling back and fighting to catch his breath, closing his eyes and trying to think past the pain that was threatening to eat him alive. 

_No. Move. Not done. Not yet_. 

The program. 

He was groaning loudly as he struggled to get back to his feet, equal parts protest and determination. All he could taste and smell was blood. He was fairly sure some of it had gotten in his eyes at some point, probably sweat too. His hair was sticking to his brow, no doubt a wild and sodden mess. Not unlike Kelly’s his own jacket hung improperly on his frame now as he used his one good arm to pull and heave and yank against the work station so he could get his legs under him again. His bad arm was trembling constantly, a shaft of pure agony from top to bottom. Ed didn’t even dare look at it. 

His voice trembled just as badly as that arm as he spoke the words at last, trying to tell himself the pounding he could hear was his own heartbeat in his skull and not footsteps crashing towards him down the hall outside. How that was better he didn’t know. “Initiate Environmental Program—” a sharp stab of pain through his chest gave him pause but he grit his teeth and pushed stubbornly past it, clutching at the work station with his one good hand, “—Finn Four-Zero-Two-Zero.” 

The computer’s voice, by comparison, was calm and composed. “Authorisation required.” 

Ed hit the corresponding message on the screen before him, propping his entire sorry weight against the station as the box appeared instead. By muscle memory more than anything else he punched in the code with one hand and waited, counting off a few seconds to himself as the ship’s computer worked. When he passed five and nothing had happened he felt the first flicker of panic. Blood was dripping onto the console from somewhere. Ed didn’t know where exactly it was coming from, only that it was his own. 

Now he _knew_ he could hear footsteps heading his way. 

“Authorisation confirmed. Initiating program.” 

Ed heard the _Orville_ ’s innermost workings coming alive, subtle hums and hisses as the ship responded to the commands it had been given and jumped into action. Ed closed his eyes and listened, hearing something release into the internal atmosphere of the ship. It was a whisper of a sound, barely audible beyond his own ragged gasps and pants, but in that moment it was like the sweetest music he had ever heard in his life. 

From outside came the unmistakable sounds of staggering and stumbling, and then the domino drops of bodies hitting the floor. Bent over the station now he listened until the last thud sounded from beyond and that soft symphonic hissing eased to a stop as the program ran its course and the ship quieted again. 

And then from behind him came a strained sound. To his right came another. Ed tensed, hissing in pain with his knees almost folding under him as he looked down to Bortus and then back at Kelly. Unconscious though they were their bodies twitched and convulsed. His gaze settled on Kelly and then he let himself buckle to the ground, coming down close to her as she arched a little up off the ground. 

It was excruciating to do it, every fibre of his being protesting the movement, but he managed to roll her awkwardly onto her side, as close to the Old Earth’s recovery position as he could manage. No sooner had he finished propping her onto her side than her body gave one last heave and from out of her mouth an alien mass slid and oozed gruesomely. It left a wet trail in its wake even as Ed struggled to pull Kelly’s body back and away from the thing which began jerking and twitching on the ground for several seconds before the life went out of it completely and it lay still. 

Turning his head, throbbing and threatening to split in half though it was, Ed watched as an identical creature spilled out of Bortus’ mouth to die in a pitiful slimy mass on the carpet. 

“Jesus Christ.” The words came rushing out of his mouth as he thudded back against the station behind him, Kelly’s head close to his knee. She was close enough to him that he could lay a hand to her messy hair, brushing enough of it from her bloodied face that he could see her features properly. Unconscious and bloody though she was she already looked more like herself. 

Ed was just about to feel a wave of relief when he remembered something else. Some _one_ else. When he tapped the comm on his sleeve, the thing somehow still attached to the fabric even after the vicious struggle in the confined space, it sent a shock of agony up his useless arm but he pushed that aside enough to say, “Mercer to Malloy.” Nothing happened. “Mercer to Malloy.” Nothing. “Gordon? Gordon, answer me.” 

Nothing. Silence. 

That dread in Ed’s stomach became a ball of sheer terror and with a single glance down at Kelly he uttered an apology to her before he heaved himself frantically back to his feet, feeling no shame whatsoever in the various sounds of pain and struggle he made as he did so. 

 

* * *

 

“Mercer to Finn.” 

“Oh my God.” Claire gasped the words even as she practically lunged for the right button on the shuttle’s main console. “Captain? Finn here. Are you all right?” 

“Doc’.” He wasn’t all right. Not at all. Claire could hear it in his voice, the strained and tight quality of it, the way his words caught and hitched in the oddest and most unnatural places. “Get back here. _Now_.” And then he was gone. 

She looked to Isaac who was already in the process of getting the shuttle moving again, and then she turned in her seat. The boys, along with Yaphit, were all looking at her expectantly, but she didn’t have any words of comfort or reassurance for them. God only knew what they were about to fly back into, the shuttle already beginning to race forward and back towards the _Orville_. Claire couldn’t tell them everything would be all right when she didn’t know that for herself. 

For some reason, in that moment, it felt like the worst idea imaginable to lie to them. 

 

* * *

 

How he made it to the top of the stairs was beyond him. Whatever adrenaline his body had afforded him during the struggles and fights was well and truly gone by that point and he was running on little more than fumes. Every breath, every movement of his muscles, every little thing was like torture and his body as well as his brain screamed at him to take a minute, lie down, just _stop_ , but he couldn’t do it. He didn’t dare. 

Gordon still hadn’t answered him. 

The bridge doors were still open and he could see dropped bodies all over the place, twisted parasitic creatures close by every single one of them. There were two out in the hall, one halfway through an opening that had, much like in Isaac’s lab, obediently remained open while there was an obstruction. Ed ignored all of them and stumbled onto the bridge, having to catch himself against one of the back consoles so he didn’t end up flat on his face on the floor instead. 

When he lifted his head, blinking past the pain and the sweat and God only knew what else, he saw Gordon. He was lying on the floor not far from the helm and he wasn’t moving. 

And his jacket was a lot darker than normal. Much too dark. 

It was a miracle he had made it to the bridge at all and even more of one that he found it in himself to practically run around the command chairs to the helm. He was down on his knees as much out of choice as necessity by the time he reached his friend’s side and he let out a string of curses as the other man’s condition really hit home. At the sight of the soaked jacket and the ugly hole from which the blood had pooled the various pains and wounds he was contending with were forgotten completely. 

“Oh God, Gordon—” Even as the gasped words left his mouth Ed was pressing his hand down over the hole that had been punched into his best friend’s stomach. He tried to bring his other into play to help keep pressure on the wound but it wouldn’t move beyond the slightest twitch and the shock of that, the force of the pain of it, was almost enough to rob him of all sense. 

Dammit. _Dammit_. 

With only one hand to use Ed pushed himself up to his knees, hoping he could use leverage and the extra weight of his upper body to apply more pressure instead. “Dammit, Gordon, hang on. Just hang on. Claire’s coming. Just breathe, stay with me, just—” 

Someone appeared in the corner of his field of vision and once the initial shock had passed he focused his gaze and met their eyes. For just a second his heart stopped. Fear burst through his brain like a firecracker. And then, just like that, it was gone. 

It was Talla. 

 

* * *

 

“T-Talla?” 

“Captain.” 

She felt sick to her stomach for too many reasons to count let alone understand, her mind such a frantic and ugly mess that she could barely even remember her own name, but as soon as she had managed to open and focus her eyes she had recognised that there was no time to feel sorry for herself. Lifting her head from the ground with a groan she had seen figures close by and used them as an anchor to get her brain to stop feeling so fuzzy. Once the fog cleared she had started moving, practically crawling across the bridge to Captain Mercer’s side where he knelt not far from the helm. On her way she had almost brought her hand down on an ugly wet _thing_ on the carpet. At the last moment she had managed to avoid it and crawled around it instead. 

Captain Mercer was a _mess_. Talla took in the ugly bruises and the split skin across his temple and above one brow, the bloody nose and mouth, the way his hair was practically glued to his head in odd places by that blood as well as sweat. His jacket was torn and misshapen. He was holding his left arm at an unnatural angle. His left hand looked broken in more than one place. 

All of that she took in within the space of a couple of seconds and once those seconds had passed she looked down at the man on the ground. Lieutenant Malloy was pale, dangerously so, his pallor made all the more shocking by the familiar vibrancy of his red hair. The bloody wound under the Captain’s hand was still oozing and Talla reached to apply pressure as well. 

She saw the way Captain Mercer tensed, how the pain of such an involuntary action flashed over his face before he could catch it and keep it at bay. 

Talla blinked, and in that blink it came back in snaps and flashes and bursts of horrible clarity. She felt sick to her stomach still and now she knew why. 

Too many of those bruises, those broken fingers, that bad arm— 

Talla raised a hand to touch her fingers to her lips in wordless shock and stopped at the sight of the blood staining her skin. It was tacky, gummy, not quite dried yet. When she looked to the Captain again she saw the same shade of red around his neck but no wound there. Her stomach dropped and she turned her head enough to see a body collapsed across the room. What blood had pumped through the woman’s veins was all over the floor around her now, freed from the ruin of her neck. 

It was all Talla could do to keep from heaving her guts up there and then. 

“Let me help,” she said instead, bringing her eyes back up to the Captain’s. He was in pain, a lot of it, more than even he could bear. She had caused a good deal of it but Gordon was dying and she had to do something. All of this, everything that had happened since that room and that body on the _Discovery_ , it could wait because it had to. Everything could wait because Gordon needed her. Still holding the Captain’s eyes she tried to keep the tears in her own at bay. “Please.” 

Captain Mercer’s nod was more of an involuntary shudder than anything but Talla took it as permission and moved in, putting her hands over Lieutenant Malloy’s stomach and the wound there. She could feel the blood trying to push up from within and applied as much pressure as she dared, fighting to control her breathing and blink the tears back. She could cry later. She could scream and shout and shatter everything in sight _later_. 

“Don’t you dare, don’t you dare, don’t you dare—” Captain Mercer was whispering the words over and over again, an endless mantra that she only realised at the last second was losing volume and force. When she lifted her head as realisation started to dawn she saw why. His eyes were slipping closed, the tension dropping out of his battered frame with alarming speed. 

The Captain collapsed sideways to the ground less than a foot away from Lieutenant Malloy. Even as she moved her hands to better cover the ugly wound Talla opened her mouth to cry out, to call the Captain’s name or for help or just in panic and frustration and fear but no sound came and then she heard footsteps thundering towards her, a rush of them approaching. 

Talla’s tears came freely when she turned her head and saw Doctor Finn racing towards her from the mouth of the bridge, a small medical team following in her wake. 

 

* * *

 

It was like nothing Claire had ever seen before in her life, like something out of any ship’s doctor’s worst nightmare, but there was no time to stop and stare and try to comprehend all that she was seeing. As quickly as possible she had to assess the damage and determine who needed her help the most. 

“ _Doctor_!” Talla’s cry was like a knife to her heart, the fear and the desperation there cutting through the momentary uncertainty that had come over her as she had taken in the mess that was the bridge. The Xelayan didn’t need to say anything else for Claire to know exactly where she needed to go, that the Lieutenant was right about where her priorities lay in that moment. Under the younger woman’s hands their Helmsman was very obviously bleeding to death and Claire carried herself to his side as quickly as she could. She didn’t need her scanner to ascertain his condition, and the urgency of it. They had to get him to sick bay immediately or he wasn’t going to make it. 

“I can carry him,” Talla said then, her voice trembling more than Claire ever would have thought possible. When she lifted her eyes and looked at the Xelayan’s face she saw the tear tracks there, still wet and fresh. She was crying even then, even as she met Claire’s gaze and nodded with determination, almost begging to be allowed to do this one thing that might help. “I can carry him,” she said again, sounding more frantic this time. 

“All right.” Claire nodded. It would be faster than getting a stretcher and Talla was certainly strong enough. This _was_ Talla as well, she could see it in the other woman’s eyes and in the shame and despair written all over her face. She didn’t need to see the dead parasite near the Captain’s chair with no other visible host source to be certain that their Chief of Security was back to being herself. 

“Doctor Finn.” Isaac had accompanied them to the bridge and had followed her all the way over to the helm. “Captain Mercer is also badly injured. If Lieutenant Keyali is able to carry Lieutenant Malloy, I will bring the Captain.” 

That was that then. “Let’s go.” She waved them both into action and looked around at the rest of the bridge and her small team going about their work swiftly and efficiently. Claire caught sight of the Ensign across the bridge, between Commander Grayson’s chair and the Navigator’s station. Nurse Park had gone to her side but he had already moved on. There was nothing they could do for her, the poor thing. As Talla gathered Lieutenant Malloy’s limp body into her arms Claire had the feeling she knew how exactly the Ensign had died. 

But all of that could wait until later. 

They couldn’t save the Ensign but Lieutenant Malloy and Captain Mercer were still alive. It was Claire’s job to keep them that way. 

 

* * *

 

Talla wanted to be sick. She wanted to shout and scream and cry and break everything in sight, tear it all to pieces with her bare hands until there was nothing left but ruins and rubble and dust. It wouldn’t do a thing for the guilt and the disgust and the grief and the horror that were threatening to consume her, more and more with every passing second, but it might help her keep hold of her sanity. 

“ _Move_!” She couldn’t help the way she snapped the word out as someone dared to step close to her path on her way to the sick bay doors. They didn’t open. “Doctor!” She heard the panic in her own voice. It felt like Gordon wasn’t breathing. She couldn’t hear anything either. Turning her head, despair briefly clouding her vision, she stumbled out of the way as Claire stepped in to release the lock that had been placed on them. 

Captain Mercer had done that. Talla remembered. She hadn’t been present when it happened but someone had told her. 

As the doors hissed open she looked at the man in the arms of the Kaylon close behind her and felt a rush of nausea all over again. 

“Talla.” It was Claire’s voice, urgent but encouraging. 

Blinking to snap herself out of her stupor she hurried through the opened doors and to the closest unoccupied bed. Claire came over even as she lowered Gordon’s limp frame onto its length, trying to be careful as well as quick, watching his face and his neck and his chest for any signs of life. He looked so still, so unlike himself. Talla couldn’t take her eyes away. Someone ushered her out of the way and she stumbled again, letting herself be moved as Claire snapped orders and moved equipment into place. Talla vaguely recognised the device that was brought over her fellow Lieutenant’s body but the name of it went straight out of her brain at the sound of the flat emergency tone that emanated from it. 

Without meaning to she staggered back into the next bed, catching herself on it with one hand and feeling her skin brush against someone else’s. When she turned her head it was Captain Mercer’s unconscious and beaten form that she found herself looking down at. All of a sudden it felt like she couldn’t breathe, like all the air had gone out of the room, and everything around her started to spin sickeningly. 

She expected the floor to rush up to meet her but instead she found herself in the arms of someone thoroughly unexpected, a strangely soothing and steady voice speaking close to her ear, telling her, “I have you, Lieutenant Keyali.” 

Isaac. Isaac had her. He had hold of her and he wasn’t letting go. And it was such a strangely gentle hold that she couldn’t keep the fresh rush of tears at bay, letting them pour out of her as she all but crumpled into the Kaylon’s arms.


	19. Damage Control

The sound of the Xelayan’s sobs were almost lost under the whine of the bed’s monitor as Claire watched for a change in the rhythm, waiting almost desperately for a jump in that flat line. “Come on, Gordon,” she whispered fiercely, looking at the Lieutenant’s pale face at the head of the bed. “Don’t you give up on us now, you hear me?” She had taken her eyes off him as she said that part, working furiously at the controls herself instead of directing one of her staff to do it. 

Nurse Park had joined them at some point and he was right there on the Lieutenant’s other side, injecting a stimulator into the other man’s neck, bringing his eyes up to Claire’s when he was done and clear. She gave a small nod and triggered another shock to the Helmsman’s heart in a frantic bid to get it beating again. The wait was agonising, terrifying, it turned her own heart to ice as she forced herself to begin to face the possibility that she might have been too late to save him, and then she heard it. 

It was the most beautiful sound she had ever heard in her life, second only to the first cries of her sons when they had been born. The monitor jumped in the very beginnings of a rhythm, a weak little thing at first but as Claire watched the screen she saw it gain strength and the first signs of stability. Her eyes moved to the Lieutenant’s face again and she let out a sigh, shaky and weary but relieved all the same. “That’s more like it,” she said, bringing a hand up and touching it first to the Helmsman’s shoulder and then the top of his head. He would be unconscious for a while, the damage he had sustained had been significant and would take time to repair, but they had managed to catch him right at the precipice and haul him back over onto solid ground at least. Claire spared the wounded man the softest of smiles and then sobered again. 

Her work wasn’t finished yet. 

Bringing her gaze up she looked first to Nurse Park, saying to the young man, “Keep an eye on Lieutenant Malloy’s vitals. If anything changes, even if only by a fraction, you shout.” He gave her an affirming nod and turned his attention dutifully down to the monitor even as she rounded the bed and moved to the next one. 

Talla was between the two, though she was all but slumped in Isaac’s arms, the Kaylon holding her close to him in a surprisingly compassionate and supportive fashion. The Xelayan had quieted somewhat but she was still upset, and obviously so, shaking and struggling to catch her breath as tears continued to work their way down her cheeks. “Isaac.” The Kaylon lifted his head just enough to tell Claire he was listening. “Take her into my office.” _And look after her_. But those words were left unspoken. There was no need for them. 

“Yes, Doctor.” And with that the Kaylon guided the Chief of Security away from the beds and towards the office. Claire watched the two of them until they were through the door and it had hissed softly closed behind them, and then she turned her attention down to her next patient. 

Captain Mercer was breathing, more than they had been able to say for Lieutenant Malloy upon their arrival, but that was the only good sign. Looking at the Captain, the _state_ of him, made Claire feel suddenly more exhausted than she had felt in a long time, and for just a moment she had to force herself to take a deep breath before she could even think how to proceed. 

First things first, she needed a medscanner. 

 

* * *

 

The taste in her mouth was worse than anything she could ever remember tasting in her life. That was the first coherent thought she had as consciousness came swimming back to her. It was beyond the worst hangover she had ever experienced, her skull pounding and her stomach doing flip-flops and all kinds of awful somersaults. Her body was aching and throbbing all over and there was a rawness in her throat that made her think she had been sick. 

When her eyes fluttered open and her vision cleared she started to understand. That understanding crept through her brain like smoke and then slipped icily through the rest of her body as she started to push herself sluggishly up from the ground. She couldn’t take her eyes from the thing on the carpet a couple of feet away, the sticky wet heap of alien flesh that showed no signs of life now that it was without a host. Kelly lifted one hand, shakily at first, and swiped roughly at her mouth and the wetness there. Her hand came away smeared with saliva and blood and what she thought might have been bile. With a grimace she spat on the ground, trying to get the taste out of her mouth, groaning as the worst of it left her tongue. 

It was then that she paused, looking down at her hand again and the blood smeared there. Touching her fingertips to her face instead she brought them away from her upper lip covered in the fluid and stared at it, trying to understand. 

Several seconds passed in which her brain struggled to engage properly, her memory working to fire clearly, and when it all kicked into gear again Kelly found herself almost wishing that it hadn’t. “Oh no.” It was a gasp of disbelief and fear and she twisted awkwardly on the ground to look for someone who, by all rights, should have been close by. “Ed?” She couldn’t see him. 

But she _could_ see Bortus. And she remembered what she had done to him. His name left her lips with concern and regret as she crawled her way over to him, aching all over as she reached the Moclan’s side and touched a hand to his shoulder. When he moaned she was reassured by the sound and with a grimace she looked down at the dead parasite not far from his face. Using a piece of Isaac’s now-scattered equipment she shoved and scooped the thing further away from Bortus and across the floor. When she looked down at him again she could see he was beginning to stir, even though his eyes hadn’t opened yet. 

“Bortus?” He made a low sound, groggily lifting a hand to touch to his head. She winced, remembering why he would want to do that. “I need to go.” She had to find Ed. “I’ll send someone back for you, okay? Just stay still.” His skull probably felt like it was going to split in half. Moclan or not she had hit him with some force and a rather large hunk of metal that was now lying bent and useless on the floor across the lab. “I’m sorry,” she said hurriedly and then she pushed herself to her feet. 

She had to find Ed. He couldn’t have gotten far, surely, though as she all but stumbled out of the lab and into the corridor beyond she reminded herself just how stubborn her ex-husband could be. There were crewmembers in various stages of recovery throughout the corridors as she moved, picking up speed as she made her way through the ship. Should she call him? No, he probably wouldn’t answer. Or couldn’t, more likely. 

So she did the next best thing. She tapped her comm. “Claire?” 

“Commander?” 

“Oh, thank God.” Kelly allowed herself a moment to feel relieved. The Doctor sounded like her usual self, albeit a little harried. “Are you in sick bay?” 

“Yes.” The other woman was silent for several seconds and when she responded again there was a knowing quality to her voice that Kelly recognised. “You should make your way here, Commander.” 

Kelly tried to swallow down the dread that swelled up inside of her but she failed miserably. “On my way,” she managed to say, keeping the tremor in her voice to a minimum at least before she ended the link. She started to jog then, building up as much speed as she could with her body protesting the way it was. Every time her boots hit the ground as she ran she remembered a flash of what had happened, a punch or a kick or a wicked remark, every blow landed by her even if she hadn’t been in control at the time. On some level she had been aware, she _had_ to have been to remember it now, but she hadn’t been able to do a single thing to stop herself. No shouting or screaming or thrashing struggle. Nothing at all. 

When the sick bay doors hissed open to permit her entry she bolted through them without hesitation but at the sight that awaited her she almost stumbled, having to catch herself against the wall to Claire’s office. Gordon was on one bed with a monitor surrounding him, Nurse Park keeping a vigil over him as the machine worked to repair some damage she couldn’t see clearly. Claire herself was at the next bed over. And there was Ed. 

Kelly stepped closer even as the Doctor lifted her head and met her gaze. Kelly dropped her eyes to Ed then, feeling like she had forgotten how to breathe as she got her first good look at him. One hand rose to her face, closing over her mouth and remaining there as she took in what she had done, or at least helped to do. The first prick of tears stung her eyes but she squeezed them shut and forced them back and down. _No_. She couldn’t do that here. Not here. Not now. 

Dropping her hand she pulled in a deep breath, holding it as she gauged where she could stand so that she wouldn’t be in the way, ending up close to the foot of the bed on the side where Claire was working. “What did I do?” She hadn’t meant to ask the question, her eyes glued to Ed’s face, but the words had slipped out of their own accord. They were practically a whisper but the other woman heard them anyway. 

To her credit Claire paused for only a moment and Kelly suspected the other woman had put two and two together. “I can give you a report later, Commander,” she said and Kelly knew what the Doctor was doing. She was trying to give her an out, a means of escape, she was trying to spare her the grief of it here and now because she knew how much it would hurt to hear the answer. 

But Kelly didn’t want to be spared. She didn’t feel like she deserved it. 

Blinking back another threat of tears she shook her head. “Now,” she said, having to clear her throat after the fact because her voice came out sounding more choked than she had intended. “Please.” It would be awful, she knew, all she had to do was look at Ed lying there, but she would go mad not knowing. It would drive her insane _not_ knowing how much damage she had done to him. 

Claire sighed quietly and Kelly thought for a moment that the other woman was going to fight her but then she shook her head, obviously admitting defeat. “His left shoulder is dislocated, and there’s some soft tissue damage around the joint. His left hand is broken in three places, including two of his fingers. One rib is broken, and at least two others are cracked. And there are hairline fractures in his right forearm, his jaw, and—” Claire hesitated, turning her gaze briefly to Kelly, “—his skull.” 

Kelly had to swallow, and roughly. The nausea had come crashing violently upward like a stormy wave. Sucking in a breath through her nose she managed to compose herself enough to ask, albeit shakily, “His skull?” Blinking several times, still fighting to keep those tears at bay, she looked to the other woman. “How bad?” 

When Claire lifted a hand and touched it to Kelly’s arm she almost lost her hold on her composure. In that moment that gift of compassion was almost more than she could bear. “He’ll recover, Kelly,” the other woman told her, her voice soft, her eyes warm and reassuring. 

Using the sleeve of her ruined jacket to wipe first under her eyes and then across her upper lip Kelly turned her focus down to the bed again, and the unconscious man occupying it. Ed looked smaller somehow, so vulnerable and so— 

“I did this.” 

“No.” Claire’s response was immediate and firm without being harsh. “The _parasite_ did this.” 

Kelly wished it was that easy to shift the blame but she could remember the feel of her knuckles landing those blows, how her muscles had burned as she had expended the energy required to do this much damage to another human being. To _Ed_. She remembered how it had felt to grapple and struggle with him, she remembered driving her body into his. She remembered making him _scream_. 

“I saw it.” Kelly shook her head, suddenly unable to take her eyes from Ed’s face and all the bruises that now mottled it, all along his jaw and over his cheekbone and around his eye and temple. Was the other side just as bad? She suspected it was. “I saw what I was doing,” she told the Doctor. “I _felt_ it.” The taste of bile tickled at the back of her throat but she swallowed against it and pressed on. Anything less was cowardice. “I was in there the entire time but there was nothing I could do to stop it.” 

“Exactly.” Claire used her hand on Kelly’s arm to turn her on the spot enough so she could capture her gaze. Kelly met it reluctantly, not unlike a child who had been caught doing something very wrong. “There was nothing you could do to stop it,” the Doctor echoed, emphasising the words and speaking them slowly, holding Kelly’s attention on her as she spoke. “All of this? Everything that’s happened? It was the parasites. And all of _this_?” With her other hand she gestured gently to Ed. “That was those things as well. Every bit of it.” With a shake of her head she added, “You, and everyone else caught up in this, you would never do anything like this. I know it and so does the rest of the crew.” 

Kelly knew how the other woman was going to conclude her point and her heart started to ache in preparation but it still hurt when Claire said, “He knows it too. And he won’t blame you. Not for a single second.” 

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? Ed wouldn’t blame her, or Talla, or Bortus or anyone else. And somehow, for some inexplicable reason that Kelly couldn’t even begin to understand, that actually made it all so much worse.


	20. Fragments

It was quiet. A nice kind of quiet. There was something reassuring about that quiet, the calmness of it, completely lacking in tension or anticipation. It wasn’t a deep breath before something terrible happened, or the eye of the storm. It just _was_. 

For a time he lay there slowly returning to consciousness, letting it happen steadily and organically rather than trying to rush it. He felt much too tired to do anything of the sort anyway, the kind of bone-deep exhaustion that was impossible to ignore or overlook, the sort someone could recognise in another person on sight with a single glance. Moving too early would be a mistake, he knew, and opening his eyes too soon might just make him want to tumble back into the darkness out of which he was still climbing. 

There were voices somewhere close by, soft and hushed, far enough away that there was some distance between wherever he was and the owner of those voices but that subdued quality had nothing to do with conspiratorialism or ill-intentions. It was the sort of sympathetic hush you would expect to find in a medical facility of whatever kind, the sort of voice a doctor or nurse used when nearby patients were trying to rest. 

When he finally opened his eyes he was looking up at an unremarkable ceiling. The lights were dropped down low. Blinking, clearing his focus a little, he tipped his head just enough to make out the rail and the curtain that was drawn around it, almost all the way around but not quite. Turning his head to the side, having to close his eyes as he did so in order to keep dizziness from interfering, he realised why that curtain wasn’t completely closed. 

Gordon was propped up a little and he had been reading something from a pad which he was in the process of setting carefully aside even as he said, “Ed. Hey.” He sounded surprised. “How you feeling?” 

Ed looked at Gordon for a few moments, frowning. It felt odd for Gordon to be asking him that but in that moment he couldn’t recall why such a thing would be strange. When it did come back, only a second or two later, whatever grogginess he had still been feeling dropped away like a stone. “Gordon?” Ed tried to sit up. 

Gordon had been _stabbed_. 

“Whoa, man, hey, take it easy.” Gordon held up a hand, meaning to put him at ease, and it did a fairly good job. He glanced towards the mostly-drawn curtains and then back at Ed, the beginnings of a smile on his face. “I’m fine. Or, I mean, I _will_ be.” Gesturing down at his abdominal region he said, “I had a pretty big hole in me for a while there but the Doc’ patched me up good. I’ll be back to normal in no time.” His smile had grown in the time he was talking. “Thanks to you, from what I hear.” 

Ed frowned again, shaking his head and regretting it when his skull was suddenly filled with a dull pulse of pain. Wincing he looked back towards Gordon. “I didn’t do anything,” he said, touching his hand to his head, half-expecting to feel an injury there. It felt like he should have been able to. 

“That’s not what the Doc’ says.” When Ed glanced back to Gordon the smile had dropped away. “She said you and Talla are the reason I’m still alive at all. She says if it hadn’t been for you guys I’d—” His words trailed off and he averted his gaze for a few moments, clearing his throat and summoning a half-formed smile back onto his face. It was for his benefit, Ed knew. Gordon didn’t really feel like smiling right then but he wanted to show his friend he was okay. Or that he _would_ be. 

“Yeah.” Ed’s voice was quiet when he said that. He knew what Gordon had been about to say even if the other man didn’t feel up to saying it. Part of him was tempted to ask his friend what time it was, what _day_ it was, just how long he had been unconscious, but he couldn’t bring himself to do that. The two of them lay in companionable and yet still somewhat uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, neither one of them really looking at the other even though they didn’t have much else in the way of options with the curtains drawn around the way they were. 

When Ed spoke again his voice was still quiet but he wasn’t sure if he had kept it dropped out of respect for anyone else in sick bay or because he wasn’t too fond of the idea of anyone overhearing what he was about to say. “It’s just flashes.” He looked to Gordon then, finding the other man already watching him. “Bits and pieces.” 

With a small nod Gordon acknowledged his understanding. Maybe it was the same for him. 

He was frowning again. Had he actually stopped frowning at any point since regaining consciousness? “I should’ve—” 

Gordon cut him off with practised ease. “Ed.” Their eyes met. “Don’t do that to yourself.” Before Ed could argue the other man went on, “I know you’re gonna blame yourself for all of this no matter what I say, but, man—” The rush of air that left Gordon’s lips wasn’t a laugh or a sigh but something oddly in between. “We’re out here in uncharted space,” he went on, “and we’re encountering all kinds of things that no one has ever seen or dealt with before. There’s no handbook for this stuff, no guidelines or rules we can read to figure out what to do.” His brows went up as he paused, shaking his head as if in disbelief. “And I mean, seriously? _Pod people_? Who would’ve seen that coming?” 

Ed almost smiled at the reference but it didn’t quite take shape as he turned his gaze back up to the ceiling, wanting to take solace in Gordon’s words and knowing that he ought to because the other man was right. But he couldn’t. Because it was too easy and it didn’t feel right. People were dead, all of them by the hands of other members of his own crew, men and women who would have to live with their actions regardless of whether or not they had been in control of themselves at the time. When he had looked into Talla’s eyes up on the bridge when Gordon had been bleeding to death he had seen the depth of understanding there, the crashing waves of it, and the _pain_ that went along with that knowledge. 

The Xelayan knew exactly what she had done and it had been tearing her up inside. In the time that had passed since Ed had lost consciousness up there and regaining it again here in sick bay how exactly had she come to terms with all that that thing had done using her body and the considerable strength it wielded? Had she come to terms with it at all? _Could_ she? 

What if she never did? 

And then there was Kelly. 

Ed couldn’t help but grimace when he remembered going toe-to-toe with her in Isaac’s lab, the ferocity and the blind animal rage of her attacks. So fast and so strong and so _driven_ she very easily could have beaten him to death. Lying there on the bed Ed believed she would have if Bortus, or the thing controlling the Moclan, hadn’t interrupted her when he had. When _it_ had. 

They had all said they needed him alive but after they had started fighting, after he had started fighting _back_ , it was like a switch had flipped in her brain. In the brain of that thing, more to the point. It was like he had triggered some primal instinct to finish the job no matter what. He had seen it in those eyes that he normally found so reassuring and comforting, eyes usually filled with warmth and intelligence and passion. 

“Ed?” 

How long had he been quiet? He turned his head and found Gordon watching him, a frown furrowing his brow. Ed recognised the concern on his face. 

“Yeah.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. Ed knew it was too small and too simple a thing to really properly acknowledge all that Gordon had said to him, all the reassurance and reason he had been trying to offer his friend, but right then it was all he could think to say. It was all he had to offer. 

Gordon was quiet for a little while, nodding his head silently after a time even though Ed could tell the other man wanted to say something further. When he did speak though he didn’t sound wounded or put out in any way. Ed was grateful for that. “The Doc’ will want to know you’re awake.” 

Ed took as deep a breath as he could draw down, closing his eyes as he gave a small nod, knowing that Gordon was still watching him and would see the motion. He hadn’t been awake for long but already he felt bone-tired again, close to exhausted enough to just drop right back off to sleep. 

How exactly Gordon attracted Doctor Finn’s attention Ed didn’t know, he missed it with his eyes closed but between one moment and the next the woman had come to stand at the side of the bed and had laid her hand gently on his arm. “Captain?” 

It was his left arm she was touching, he realised, and as he opened his eyes and blinked a few times to clear them of the fog that had managed to settle he looked down and realised she must have repaired it. Of course she had. That was her job, after all. 

She gave him a small smile. There was something quietly maternal about the expression. “There you are.” She gave him a couple of moments, presumably to gather himself again. Ed wondered if he had actually dropped off again between Gordon mentioning alerting the Doctor and the Chief Medical Officer arriving at his bedside. “How are you feeling?” 

That was a loaded question, and he almost said as much, before he settled for simplicity even if it was somewhat tainted by a white lie. “Fine.” 

One of the Doctor’s eyebrows quirked upward just enough for Ed to suspect she wasn’t in the least bit fooled by the lie. Whether it was because of her professional experience or the fact that she was a mother of two was anyone’s guess. “Do you remember what Commander Grayson told me once, during your first mission as Captain of the _Orville_?” 

Ed did remember but he remained quiet, feeling Gordon’s eyes on them. 

“Straight answers without cussing,” Claire said, her voice quiet, and her hand still on his arm. That was all she said on the matter though, leaving it at that as she turned her gaze back towards the other bed. “Lieutenant Malloy, I thought I told you to get some rest.” 

“I _am_ resting!” Gordon’s protest was half-hearted and actually contained a thread of amusement. “I’m still in bed, aren’t I?” 

“Hm.” She wasn’t convinced, obviously, and with a small sigh she stepped closer to his bed and took hold of the curtain. “Get some _rest_ , Lieutenant. I’m not afraid to sedate you, remember.” 

Gordon held his hands up in a show of surrender. “Okay, okay! Jeez.” He tossed one last glance in Ed’s direction, one last smile, as the curtain was pulled closed all the way, shutting him off from sight. 

Ed had smiled a little at the exchange but the expression didn’t last long. By the time Doctor Finn turned her attention back to him it had faded away completely. She pulled his curtain closed a little more behind her as she reclaimed her spot by his bedside. “Shall we try this again, Captain?” she asked him, medscanner in hand now. 

He looked up at her, daring to meet her eyes for several seconds before he averted his gaze, letting out a sigh. “Tired,” he admitted then, partly because he did want to give her an answer but also because he didn’t know what else to say. How else could he answer her question? How was he feeling? How was he _supposed_ to feel? Ed doubted there was a single person aboard the _Orville_ who knew how to answer that question right now. 

Claire’s eyes were down on the instrument in her hand as she set it to work but Ed knew she was still paying close attention to him. “In more ways than one, I’ll imagine,” she said to him and there was a knowing edge to her voice that he couldn’t help but hear. Her gaze briefly left the scanner and flicked to his face. “You’ve been in sick bay for a couple of days,” she told him. “I kept you sedated.” 

Ed wasn’t sure why she would have felt the need to do that. 

Thankfully she went on to explain herself, “I wanted to make sure you didn’t try to do anything stupid, like get out of bed before I was ready to let you.” Her brows had lifted while she was talking. “If you had tried to so much as sit up before now you probably would have ended up hurting yourself, or at least undoing some of the healing.” Healing she had kick-started and helped along with all her knowledge and expertise. “Even now I’m not sure I’d trust you to—oh for God’s sake.” 

Ed hadn’t intended to move but something in his stupid brain had told him to sit up when Doctor Finn had voiced such strong doubts about his ability to do so and before he was even halfway through the motion he regretted not catching himself sooner. Actually regret was a vast and almost laughable understatement. Even after spending a couple of days being healed and recovering in sick bay his body felt on the verge of betraying him at any moment. The grimace didn’t leave his face even once he was up with one leg hanging off the side of the bed, his hands gripping its edges with white-knuckle force. His breathing was heavy and a little uneven and that dull pulse of discomfort in his skull had taken a jump up to actual pain. For a couple of moments he felt genuinely nauseated. 

“Honestly? You’re worse than my kids.” The Doctor didn’t sound thrilled but when he managed to open his eyes and look at her there was something in her eyes that made him think she wasn’t really angry with him. If he didn’t know any better he could have sworn it was a sort of fondness but Ed didn’t trust that he wasn’t reading too much into it. “Do you feel better now?” The way she asked the question made him think she doubted it. 

She was right. “Not really,” he admitted. 

With a low noise of disapproval and a shake of her head she went back to her scanner, remaining quiet as she finished her examination. She set the instrument aside and removed her light from her pocket, directing him to look at her so she could shine it in his eyes one at a time. Ed had a hard time not flinching away from the light but Claire was patient and waited for him to adjust to the brightness a little before she went ahead. 

“Well,” she said to him, returning the light to her pocket, “you still have a little way to go before I’m happy to sign you off as fit to return to duty, but you’re doing much better than you were.” After a pause she added, “Though given your condition when Isaac carried you down here maybe that’s not saying much.” 

It was as if someone had thrown a glass of cold water in his face. Ed’s head snapped up and he felt his eyes widen. “Isaac?” 

She smiled at him and gave a small nod. “We found him. Or, rather, Marcus did. Something he said while we were out in the shuttle made me realise he’d been under our noses the entire time.” With a hint of what he thought _might_ have been embarrassment she added, “Yaphit too, as it turned out.” 

Ed frowned, trying to make sense of the words, fighting past the dull throbbing in his head until enough of the fog had cleared and the answer came to him in a moment of frustrating clarity that he wished he’d had days ago. “The _Discovery_ ,” he said, the air rushing out of him in disappointment aimed entirely inward. “The safe room.” Or whatever they wanted to call it. 

The Doctor knew what he meant and nodded. “Apparently the parasites controlling Bortus and Talla sealed them in there after we had our last senior staff meeting in the briefing room.” 

Ed felt like even more of a fool than he had before. His gaze had dropped to the floor and he let out a sigh. It caused his shoulders to drop and he felt one of Claire’s hands settle there but he wasn’t sure if she was offering him support in the emotional sense or purely the physical. 

“You couldn’t have known, Captain.” 

“I could have.” He brought his head up again. She was ready to meet his gaze and she held it steadily. “I _should_ have.” Because he was the Captain, because these were his people, and because he was responsible for every single one of them. No exceptions. No excuses. That was _his_ job. Ed had failed them, several of them in the worst way imaginable, and sitting on the edge of the bed in that moment he didn’t know how to make peace with that, or how he would be able to move past it. 

What if he couldn’t? 

Claire’s hand on his shoulder gave a small squeeze. He brought his eyes back to hers, unsure when he had dropped them again, and when she gave him a wordless nod the only thing he could think to do in response was mirror the motion back at her. All of a sudden it felt like too much to even try to speak again, there were too many horrible thoughts and regrets crashing through his mind and if he opened his mouth to try and give a single one of them voice they might all come spilling out at once. Ed didn’t think he could handle that kind of chaotic mess right now. 

Or maybe he just didn’t _want_ to. 

Ed honestly wasn’t sure which was worse. 

 

* * *

 

The shock of the impact reverberated all the way up her arm and into her shoulder. It was almost painful. Instead of flinching away from that she struck it again, and then again, and then a fourth time. When she stepped back she was breathing heavily, a fine sheen of sweat glistening on her brow and across her chest where it was bared by the loose shirt she was wearing. Her hair was beginning to dampen as well. She recognised the feeling that came with a rough and vigorous workout. 

But it still wasn’t enough. 

Flexing out her hands Talla looked down at them, turning them so she could look at the knuckles. The skin was reddened but there were no abrasions, no split skin or streaks of blood. She had the safety protocols to thank for that. Without them she would have made a mess of her hands already and as she stood there examining them in the dim light of the simulated environment she realised she was sorry that she hadn’t. 

It wouldn’t have helped anything, splitting her knuckles open and getting blood all over the place. It wouldn’t have helped anything to fracture the bones in her hands. But maybe, just maybe, it would have made her feel a little less terrible. 

Probably not. 

Talla pulled in a deep breath and lifted her gaze to the column in front of her. There were cracks in it but it hadn’t split through yet and that wasn’t good enough. Everything fragile enough to buckle in the face of a Xelayan’s rage already lay scattered and shattered in fragments and splinters all around her and when she had smashed the last easily breakable thing she had started in on the support beams of the place. When she had started she had known what simulation this building was part of, what the bigger picture was all about, but now she had lost her grasp on that information and it had flittered out of her head completely. Because it didn’t mean anything, it wasn’t important, and she didn’t care. She had needed something to destroy and this was as good as anything else. 

It was better than fighting a person. Talla had considered the prospect for all of thirty seconds before she had dismissed it altogether, telling herself that the tightness in her stomach had nothing to do with apprehension and more to do with the fact that she hadn’t had a decent meal in God only knew how long. 

She hit the column again, and then again, each blow sending those shocks up her arms. A cloud of dust had puffed into the air in front of her face but she didn’t waste any time waving a hand to scatter it, instead sending another hammer-strike of a blow into the thing. She heard something crack that time and sure enough when she drew her hand back she could see it. 

It wasn’t big enough. 

Talla hit it again, and again, and _again_ , her breathing growing increasingly ragged and frantic. Pieces of concrete had begun to crumble away under the ferocity of her blows but it still wasn’t enough. So she kept hitting it, swinging over and over and over again until every single muscle in her arms was burning and her lungs were aching and it felt like her heart was going to burst right out of her chest. 

Her last blow was punctuated by a guttural yell fuelled by frustration and grief and no small amount of self-reproach and with an almighty crack the column succumbed at last. Talla stumbled back as it gave way, continuing to backpedal as it tore a chunk of ceiling down with it that landed in a violent cloud of dust and debris. 

She hadn’t even realised someone else had entered the simulator until she heard the voice from behind her. “Very impressive, Lieutenant.” 

Whirling, her weight balanced on the ball of one foot, her stance reflexively shifting into one of readiness, Talla found herself facing Lieutenant Commander Bortus and she was instantly filled with a great rush of shame. How long had he been standing there? How much had he seen? 

Brushing stray wisps of hair from her face she did her best to catch her breath. “Commander.” Self-consciously she dusted her hands off on the legs of her sweatpants. “I didn’t see you there.” Obviously. “I can leave if you—” 

With a small shake of his head he cut short her attempt to give herself an easy out. “That will not be necessary, Lieutenant,” he told her, stepping further into the simulated space, far enough now that the doors faded from sight. “Forgive me if I am intruding.” 

“No, Sir.” It was Talla’s turn to shake her head. She had her gaze dropped, rubbing at her knuckles even if they still showed no signs of damage beyond a slight reddening. Claire would be grateful she hadn’t disengaged the safeties, she was sure. The Doctor had more than enough work on her plate right now, she didn’t need to deal with a Xelayan throwing a tantrum. The other woman wouldn’t see it that way, of course, but standing there with Bortus watching her that was exactly what it felt like. 

Talla felt ridiculous. 

“May I ask,” Bortus began, his voice steady and his words slow, almost as if he was hesitant, “what it is exactly that you were doing?” 

She lifted her eyes and found him looking around the space, at all of the broken and ruined furnishings, the shattered frames that had housed nondescript pictures and paintings. There was even a rather large hole in the far wall. It had been a nice room. Now? Not even close. It was destroyed. 

Talla didn’t know what to say to answer the Moclan’s question, looking around at what remained of the room and all that it had contained, feeling increasingly absurd and foolish for letting her feelings get the better of her. And worse, for letting someone else get a look at that complete and utter lack of control. After all that had happened recently she should have exercised more of that, _control_ , but once she had gotten started she hadn’t been able to stop. The broken column was evidence enough of that. 

Bortus made a low sound in his throat, bringing her attention back to him. “I believe I understand,” he said, dipping his head a little and saying nothing more for a few moments. Instead he let her absorb those words and the meaning of them. He watched her and she felt a little uncomfortable but when she lifted her gaze and met his properly she realised there was no judgement there. Not a shred of it. 

“I was in there the whole time.” She tapped her chest, and then her head. “In _here_.” Her hair was cast into further disarray from the force with which she shook her head. “But I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I couldn’t stop _myself_.” 

“I understand,” he told her, remaining in place and standing very still now. “I experienced the same thing.” 

Of course he had. She remembered that. 

“And it is—” his head tilted a fraction to one side, “—difficult.” He straightened again. “To come to terms with all that was done when we were under their control is not easy.” 

Talla’s laugh was brief and humourless. It sounded too bitter to her ears. She bit back and swallowed down anything else like it that might have tumbled past her lips, looking down at her feet for a moment as she gathered herself. Drawing in a deep breath through her nose she lifted her head again, gathering together the frayed edges of her composure, pulling them in as close and tight as she could. “I tried to fight it,” she told him, not feeling any better for saying the words but understanding that it was important to speak them anyway. “Every moment that it was in control of every thought and word and action I tried to fight it. And it was _exhausting_ , and it didn’t work, not even for a second. But I kept fighting.” 

Bortus gave her another of his small nods. “Yes.” He was quiet again then, letting her go on if she wished to do so. 

She did. “Because I knew that if I stopped, if I _didn’t_ fight it, then sooner or later it would have taken over completely.” The shake of her head was a small motion. “At some point I would have just—” 

“Faded away.” Bortus’ voice was quiet, surprisingly so for someone so large and imposing, and Talla met his eyes anew. Of course he understood. Of course he knew how she felt. 

“I am _so_ sorry,” she said to him then, shaking her head more fully, gathering enough courage to close the distance between them even if only by a single step. 

Talla had infected Bortus. She remembered catching him off guard and overpowering him. She remembered that thing inside of her doing that to him. 

“There is no need to apologise, Lieutenant.” 

She frowned and started to argue with him, her mouth already open to do so, but he held up a hand. Talla closed her mouth again immediately, silencing herself. 

“You said it yourself. You were fighting the creature. Every moment that it had you under its control, you were fighting. Yes?” Only after she had nodded her agreement did he continue, “Then there is no need for you to apologise to me, because it was not your choice. You were not in control of anything that happened. I know that.” 

She had to pull down another deep breath then. Why did the understanding and compassion being offered seem to hurt so much more than the blame or resentment she had been expecting? It didn’t seem fair that that was the case. 

“But,” Bortus began, sounding suddenly weary, “I understand also that it is not easy to accept these things. Even if they are true it is—” He fell quiet, struggling to find the word. 

Talla gave it to him. “Difficult.” 

He met her gaze. “Yes.” 

Difficult was an understatement, and a drastic one at that. Talla couldn’t think of a better way to describe it though. Impossible was going too far, it was too large and too powerful a word and she was afraid to face it as an option, and so she wouldn’t. It had to be possible to get past this, to move forward, because what would her life be if it wasn’t? What would become of her then? 

She took in Bortus standing across from her. 

What would become of _them_? 

Lifting one hand she swiped some of her hair back behind her ear where it had come free of its tie, gathering herself enough to ask, “Would you like to join me, Commander?” She wouldn’t have to clarify what she meant. It was obvious enough and Bortus was intelligent and perceptive. He knew exactly what she had been doing. 

The Moclan regarded the ruins of the large room anew, turning to take it in in its entirety before he regarded her levelly. “Thank you, Lieutenant,” he said to her, and then he stepped closer. “I believe I would like that.” 

Talla actually managed to offer him a small smile as she angled her head back to look up at him. Instead of saying anything she just nodded, showing she was glad. The room had two more large support beams identical to the one she had already destroyed. They could take one each.


	21. Time

At some point Kelly had lost track of just how much time was passing, just how long she had been in her quarters. The _Orville_ was waiting for a fellow Union ship to arrive to assist with the clean-up of what had happened and to properly catalogue all that remained on the _Discovery_. By all rights perhaps she should have been on the bridge but it was easier to shrug off any sense of guilt she might have felt about keeping her distance with Claire’s recommendation that she take it easy for a while. That gave her the best excuse to steer clear. 

Perhaps excuse wasn’t the right word. 

Personally Kelly thought that was exactly what it was. 

The star-peppered blackness beyond her window was a sorry distraction from all the thoughts that fought to crash through her head and no matter how hard she worked to keep them at bay there was no holding them back, at least not fully. They would worm their way through her defences, seep in through the cracks in the walls she was trying to keep up, and with a heavy sigh she took her eyes from the expanse of space outside and looked to the glass on the table. 

Wine was a bad idea. Or, more to the point, another glass would be a bad idea. 

Scooping it up and setting it on the side in the kitchenette area of her lower quarters Kelly ordered coffee instead, already knowing full well that she wouldn’t drink it. It had been stupid to synthesise it, a waste really, and as she looked down into the steaming liquid she realised she was trying to distract herself by thinking about just how much energy it required to create such a thing.

 The doorbell chimed. She lifted her head, blinking her eyes, still cradling the cup in her hands as she padded across the room and answered the call. 

As soon as the doors opened she wished she had stayed where she was, wished she had stayed quiet, wished she had pretended she was asleep or anywhere else on the ship. Her stomach had instantly tied itself into a knot and her heart felt like it was in the process of doing the same, already aching so much that it was all she could do to suck down a breath. Too late she realised she was staring and dropped her gaze, finding herself once again looking into that stupid cup of coffee that she really didn’t want. 

Ed was quiet at first, letting her get used to the idea that he was standing there, maybe, or not wanting to make her feel worse. Kelly wasn’t sure which was more likely. Normally she had no trouble at all figuring out what was driving him at any given moment in time but that ability to read him like a book required her to _look_ at him and right then she didn’t trust herself to do that. 

“Kel?” 

She didn’t want to look at him. 

And yet she did. With a pang she realised she wanted nothing more. No matter how awful she would feel she wanted to look him in the eye and see that he was alive and breathing and healing. She had to see with her own eyes that she hadn’t destroyed him. 

Kelly lifted her gaze. Her eyes met Ed’s and she forgot how to breathe for a few seconds, going on to study his face and how he stood there on the other side of the threshold, how he carried himself and balanced his weight. With the swift ease that came with years of practise and experience she studied every little detail but it did little to relieve the pain she was feeling. If anything it only made her feel that much worse. 

Claire had done an amazing job, as usual, and Kelly wasn’t surprised in the least by that. The bruises were all but gone and his left arm showed no signs of injury at all. His breathing was steady and measured with no hitch or struggle. For all intents and purposes Ed looked just fine. But Kelly didn’t feel better because she knew it had been more than physical. Not just for Ed but for all of them, that much was true, but standing there looking at him she remembered backhanding him across the face, pinning him to the wall, twisting his arm behind his back, slamming her foot into his stomach, breaking his ribs and dislocating his shoulder. She remembered trying to _kill_ him. 

“Hey.” His voice was soft, practically a whisper. It snapped her out of her dark reverie and Kelly admonished herself silently. “Kel, are you—” 

“Coffee?” Without thinking she had offered him the mug and for a couple of seconds he hesitated, unsure, before he took it with a quiet muttering of thanks, obviously a little thrown by the gesture but not wanting to reject it. She felt terrible for that because he looked lost and she had made him feel that way. “Come in,” she said to him then, her own voice quiet and a little sheepish, backing away from the door so he could cross the threshold if he wanted to. If nothing else it gave her the opportunity to turn away and screw her eyes shut, allowing that self-resentment to crash inward powerfully. She heard the doors hiss closed and with a glance back over her shoulder she saw he had accepted her invitation. 

Kelly had made her way back to the couch but didn’t sit, instead standing there knitting her hands without even realising that she was doing it. When she did she stopped herself instantly. Ed knew she only did that when she was feeling self-conscious. 

“Do you want to sit?” 

God, she didn’t know how to act. What to say, what to do, how to feel. All of it was a muddle, a tangle of uncertainty. She hated it. _More_ than hated it. As Ed nodded his head quietly and accepted the fresh invitation, crossing the room to sit at the other end of the couch, she tried to remember a time when she had ever felt this awkward around him. She came up short. Never in all her time knowing him had she felt like this, or been so silent, so unsure and at a loss. Even after all that had happened with their divorce she hadn’t been this insecure, she hadn’t been afraid to look him in the eye or be in close proximity with him. It had _hurt_ , certainly, and she had felt terrible for what she had done, but standing there in that moment all of that felt like nothing in comparison. 

Kelly realised she was still standing and lowered herself to her end of the couch as smoothly as she could, trying not to do so too quickly because that would draw attention to the motion. Her blanket was half-dropped from the back of the couch and for a moment she was tempted to pull it around herself but she resisted the impulse, no matter how strong it was. 

“How are you?” 

She had meant to ask him that first but Ed had beaten her to it. Of course he had. Of course that was why he had come as well. Kelly allowed herself a moment to feel even more terrible than she already had and then she lifted her gaze and met his eye, if only briefly. “Fine,” she said, hearing the lie and knowing instantly that he would too. Before he could call her on it, his brow already beginning to furrow, she went on, “When did Claire discharge you from sick bay?” Suddenly she wished she had gotten herself a glass of water. 

Ed looked down into the coffee she had given him. “This morning,” he told her, looking up at her again. In that moment of renewed eye contact she saw that he had wanted to give her space and had held off as long as he could before coming here. He hadn’t wanted to disturb her, or upset her, but there was something else as well. It took her a moment but she saw it in the slightest crease of his brow and the subtlest downward turn of his mouth. 

He felt guilty. _Ed_ felt guilty. 

Having to blink her eyes rapidly she turned her face away, clearing her throat as quietly and casually as she could as she rose from the couch and crossed back to the synthesiser. The glass of water was cool in her hands and did a fairly good job of steadying them as she stood there with her back to him for a while. 

Of _course_ he felt guilty. Kelly couldn’t even be angry with him for it and she admonished herself again for not anticipating it. Ed Mercer had a remarkable capacity for self-reproach, for taking all of the blame and responsibility and piling it all on his own shoulders. Sharing the burden never occurred to him for long and part of her had always admired that about him but it had always worried her as well. It had played a part in the collapse of their marriage but it was the mental and emotional toll it took in times and situations like this that concerned her more than anything, the lasting psychological damage it might do. No one person was meant to take so much onto themselves, humans were not designed to bear so much alone. 

Kelly set the empty glass back on the counter after draining it in its entirety and it was only then that she heard him speak her name. When she turned her head she realised he had risen from the couch and followed her across the room. She turned the rest of her body, facing him properly, and went back to wringing her hands. Suddenly it didn’t seem to matter that he would recognise the motion because it was the only thing keeping her from reaching for him with them and Kelly didn’t feel like she deserved to even _try_. 

“Kel.” 

Part of her wanted to tell him to stop calling her that, because that was his fond and familiar name for her and she didn’t feel like she deserved it right then. The same part of her wanted to tell him to stop looking at her like that, like his heart was breaking for her instead of himself when he had more right to feel pained in more ways than one. Kelly wanted to tell him that she didn’t deserve _any_ of it because that thing inside of her had tried to kill him and she hadn’t been strong enough to stop it. 

But the words wouldn’t come. 

Instead her hands stilled and then one of them lifted, seemingly of its own accord, rising to reach for his face almost as if there was a part of her that suddenly couldn’t quite believe he was standing there in front of her and she had to touch him to know that he was real. But more than anything Kelly just had to know that he was _here_ , in this moment, here with her, and that she hadn’t lost him forever. 

Because no matter what she told him and everyone around them, no matter what she tried to tell _herself_ , she still— 

Kelly froze, her hand close to his face but not quite there, fear stilling every inch of her. Because what if he shied away? What if he flinched? What if his breathing caught and he paled, even if only by a fraction? 

What if she had gone too far? What if she really had pushed him away, once and for all? 

Kelly couldn’t know for sure but right then, standing there so close to him and yet feeling so very far away, she thought her heart might have been breaking. 

 

* * *

 

Her hand was so close to him but it felt like there were miles separating them and Ed couldn’t bear it. After all that had happened, all that they had been through, it was the proverbial straw that would break the camel’s back and he couldn’t stand it. The sight of her standing there frozen in place, suddenly more afraid than he had ever seen her in all the years that they had known one another, was enough to break his heart. And it was too much. 

Ed reached up with his own hand and caught hers, wrapping his fingers around it gently and with care, not wanting to startle her, almost like she was a wild animal. In the same moment he stepped towards her, closing the gap between them, but doing so slowly so she wouldn’t feel cornered. Ed knew why she had frozen, why she was hesitating, and he wanted her to know that she was wrong. He wanted her to know that there was nothing that that thing inside her could have done to make him fear her. Ed couldn’t even imagine a reality in which such a thing was possible and he needed Kelly to understand that. 

Still holding on to her hand he lifted his other and did exactly what she had been intending to do. Her skin was smooth and warm and he brushed his thumb softly over the curve of her cheekbone before he lightly stroked her hair back over her ear. His touch slid down to her jaw and lingered there as he held her eyes, dreading the idea of her dropping her gaze and shrinking away from him in even the smallest sense. 

But she didn’t. 

Kelly kept looking at him as he looked at her and he felt relief begin to build up inside of him. There was a shimmering quality to her eyes that he recognised that threatened to crush that relief down though and he frowned, shaking his head. He knew that look. Ed knew the guilt and the pain that he was seeing in her eyes and he wanted to tell her that it didn’t belong there. He wanted to tell her that she had done everything that she could, she had done everything a person _could_ do in the impossible situation in which she had found herself, if not more. Ed had so many things he wanted to tell her but in that moment, holding her hand and touching her jaw and standing so close to her, he couldn’t think of a single word to convey any of it. 

And what he wanted to do more than anything, he couldn’t. Because it was crossing a line that she had drawn in the sand between them. And because he was terrified of losing her. 

When he leaned closer to her he pressed the kiss to her cheek instead, lingering there and feeling the way her whole body shuddered, hearing the way her breathing caught. Without looking he knew she had closed her eyes. 

Her other arm went around him then and he stepped into her properly, breaking the kiss from her cheek so she could bury her face against his neck, all but melting into him. In the years that they had known one another he could count on one hand with fingers to spare the number of times that she had done this, the times when she had come so close to falling apart at the seams. 

Kelly had always been the stronger one, the toughest of them. And those things had used that against her. 

Against _them_. 

“I love you.” His voice was whisper-quiet and soft, and he turned his head so his cheek was resting against her hair. She shuddered against him again and held him even tighter, almost as if she had been afraid to _really_ hold him before. She had been worried about hurting him again. But it hadn’t been her before. It had looked like her and sounded like her and she had been trapped in there somewhere but it hadn’t been _his_ Kelly Grayson. Not even for a second. 

Ed had known that the entire time but Kelly hadn’t. She couldn’t believe it. He felt that in the way she trembled against him, the way she fought to keep the tears at bay. He felt it in every shaking breath that raced in and out of her, and the way her heart hammered so close to his own. He felt it in the way she clutched at him like a woman who was deathly afraid of drowning. 

But he wouldn’t let that happen. Ed would help Kelly keep her head above water even if it meant letting himself drown instead. Something told him that she knew that and the grief he could feel wracking her frame now was as much to do with that as anything else that had happened. She knew him too well, if such a thing were possible. But that was a two way street. And that was why he had come, why he hadn’t been able to stay away, because he had known she would tear herself apart here in her solitude if she was left alone long enough to do so. 

If their positions were reversed she would have done the exact same thing for him and Ed knew that as surely as he knew his own name. He didn’t doubt it for so much as a second. They were a team. They were in this together, and they were _stronger_ together. No matter what. 

 

* * *

 

Kelly wasn’t sure how long exactly they had stood like that, just how much time had passed with her all but folded into Ed’s arms. He had held her while she cried and hated herself every second of it because she was stronger than that and she had never liked to fall apart. Even in front of the one person she trusted more than anyone else in her entire life she did not like to lose her composure and come apart at the seams. She was strong, she was tough, she was collected and in control at all times. 

Except she wasn’t. If nothing else this recent situation had shown them all just how easy it was to lose something so simple, something they all took for granted. Control was a precious thing and she had had hers well and truly stripped away from her, just like Talla and Bortus and so many others throughout the ship. They had been used by those creatures and made to do things they never would have dreamed of doing otherwise. Kelly couldn’t imagine she was the only one who felt sick to her stomach just thinking about it. Not just thinking about it either, but remembering it. And vividly. 

She lifted her gaze from the mug in her hands and looked to Ed. His head was turned and at first she thought he was staring at the coffee table, unremarkable though it was, before it occurred to her that he wasn’t really seeing it. He was lost in thought, looking at nothing at all, or at least not anything outside of his own mind. 

At some point they had moved back to the couch, Kelly suspecting Ed had been the one to steer them in that direction, each of them reclaiming their respective ends though there was much less distance between them now. She was glad for that. It had felt so alien before, so cold and unnatural. Now they were sitting close enough to one another that she could make out all the tiny details in his expression that she had committed to memory long ago, making a mental catalogue so that she would always know just what he was thinking, just what he was feeling, and how intensely. That intimate knowledge had helped her countless times over the course of her time serving aboard the _Orville_ , just as it helped her now. 

Because she knew he was replaying it all in his mind, from start to finish. Ed was replaying it all so he could see where he had gone wrong and how he might have done things differently to change the outcome. Kelly’s heart started to hurt as she watched the furrow in his brow deepen just a fraction, just enough to tell her that he thought he had found a misstep or a stumble that somehow put him at fault. 

They were sitting close enough now that she could reach out and touch him if she wanted to. That was exactly what she wanted, what she _needed_ , and so that was exactly what she did. Without saying a word she lifted one arm and touched his shoulder. It was enough to stir him out of his thoughts and turn his head towards her. With his eyes finding her face she lifted her hand and used her fingers to gently brush his hair back, taking her time with the motion not only because she was still worried about hurting him but also because she had always loved to do this when they were married. Back when things had been simpler and cleaner it had been one of her favourite things to do, running her fingers through his hair like this, sometimes just to pass the time but more often than not to put him at ease for whatever reason. Sometimes it was because he was stressed after a particularly trying day at work while at others he was worrying himself sick over one concern or another. It had always helped Kelly as well, it had soothed and comforted her and made her feel that little bit more grounded and collected. It had made her feel like she belonged. 

It was a simple thing, the sort of thing she had definitely taken for granted during their marriage, but watching him now she believed with all her heart that _he_ needed the contact just as much as she did. 

Ed’s frown deepened for just a moment before his expression wavered and then softened and Kelly offered him a gentle smile. Weary and worn though it was it was one that he returned in kind and she saw the quiet gratitude in his. He made no move to stop her as she brushed his hair back one more time, her touch lingering, and she was grateful for that, that he allowed her to indulge a little. Just as it always had when they were together it made her feel more anchored and tethered and when she withdrew her hand, albeit slowly and somewhat reluctantly, she was able to take a deeper breath more easily than before. 

“I really am sorry,” she said to him then, her voice little more than a whisper. 

When Ed shook his head he barely moved at all, the motion was so small and so slight. Anyone else would have missed it. “Don’t apologise, Kel,” he told her, and there was a warmth and a kindness there. “Not to me.” 

Kelly frowned. Who else should she apologise to? 

“I could have stopped that from happening to you but I didn’t take the chance when I had it.” Surprisingly he actually smiled a little there, even if only for a moment. “You were smarter than me.” 

She understood what he meant then. He was talking about the moment when she had injected him, catching him off guard and going against his wishes. Dropping her gaze she asked, “You really didn’t see that coming?” When she angled her gaze up towards his face again she saw his smile had returned. 

“I _should_ have,” he said, shifting just enough to take his mug from the table where he had set it down. “I don’t know why I didn’t.” He looked into her eyes. “Like I said, you were smarter than me.” 

It was Kelly’s turn to shake her head. “You had a lot on your mind.” 

Ed could have argued with her then but for whatever reason he chose not to and instead drank from the mug. There was the smallest grimace on his face when he lowered the mug and set it back on the table and without a word she offered her own to him again. Hers was hot, freshly synthesised, while his had likely cooled too much to be palatable. With the slightest smile of gratitude and only a moment of hesitation he took it and sipped from the rim. 

Kelly narrowed her eyes, once again studying the tiniest shifts in his expression. “You still do,” she said. When he looked at her and said nothing she gave a nod of her head, indicating his own in the process. “There’s still a lot going on in there.” She could see it in his eyes as much as anything else. _A lot_ was an understatement. 

Ed’s sigh was quiet but it was weighted with the countless concerns that were tumbling through his mind, far too many for any one person to keep track of. With his free hand he rubbed at his face, pressing his thumb and middle finger against his closed eyelids before he briefly pinched the bridge of his nose. “Yeah,” was all he said when he finally spoke, but Kelly counted it as a victory anyway because more often than not it was close to impossible to get him to admit there was anything bothering him at all. 

“Talk to me.” 

He turned his head and met her gaze but she didn’t smile because it was the wrong time, because all of those things gnawing away at him inside did not warrant smiles and easy outs. They were tricky and complicated and painful. So very painful. She knew that because she was feeling them too. Kelly wouldn’t cheapen all of those things by smiling at him, no matter how much she wished it could be that simple. 

Ed shifted in his seat but it wasn’t to put any kind of distance between them, instead he shuffled that little bit closer and turned a fraction more towards her. Kelly noted he was careful with the coffee in his hand as he did so, not wanting to spill any on the couch. It was such a simple consideration but one that reminded her why she cared so much for him. 

Why she _loved_ him. 

When he started to speak he didn’t start where she thought he might but then she realised he was easing himself in, and when he had shifted his position on the couch he had been getting himself comfortable. “Claire says John and the others are recovering nicely. They should be out of sick bay within the next twenty-four hours.” 

“That’s good.” Kelly nodded her head and gratefully accepted the coffee mug when he offered it back to her, taking a sip from the rim, holding the mug in both hands. With a small frown of concern as she lowered the mug from her lips she asked, “What about Marcombe? Is he going to be okay?” 

It was Ed’s turn to nod. “He’s already back on his feet. Same with Gordon.” He smiled then, softly and gratefully, and Kelly could see the relief in his eyes. As the smile was fading he said, “Thank God for Claire.” 

Kelly’s voice was quiet when she agreed with him, looking down into the coffee. “You can say that again.” Where would any of them be without their Chief Medical Officer? They would have been assigned another doctor, she knew, but would they have been anywhere near as talented and driven as Claire Finn? Somehow she doubted it, and that was nothing against any other medical officer in the Fleet. It was just that as far as Kelly was concerned Claire was one of a kind and they were _beyond_ lucky to have her. Not only had she patched up every single one of the wounded but she had formulated a way to combat and therefore defeat the parasites as well as figuring out how to successfully and harmlessly purge the toxins from the comatose victims. She was an incredible woman, to say the least. 

Ed was reaching for the mug, which she let him take, as he said sombrely, “Lieutenant Rendell has requested a transfer.” 

Kelly’s eyes lifted instantly. “Really?” There was a small pang of grief through her chest. 

As he nodded, looking down into the coffee, Ed went on, “Claire tried to talk her out of it, as did a few other people, but she seems to have her heart set on it.” He lifted the mug to drink but his heart wasn’t in it. He was doing it just to have something to do, Kelly knew. Ed hated being completely unoccupied. 

Frowning, Kelly reached out and touched his arm. “You could try talking to her?” 

“I did.” Ed lifted his gaze to meet hers and he shook his head briefly. “So did Gordon.” 

Kelly knew Ed would have done everything in his power to get Rendell to stay, to change the Lieutenant’s mind and assure her that nothing that had happened during the incursion had been her fault, but the other woman obviously couldn’t accept any of that. Kelly supposed she could understand. Sitting there looking at Ed in that moment she thought about how difficult she was finding it to make peace with the fact that she had done him, one person, so much harm. Rendell had almost killed Ensign Marcombe, and Gordon as well. Was it really so surprising that she couldn’t bear the thought of looking either one of them in the eye after that? Even if it hadn’t been her fault she obviously couldn’t bring herself to believe it. Kelly sighed, lowering her touch to Ed’s hand and giving it the smallest squeeze, and choosing not to say anything more on the subject. Rendell’s departure would weigh on his mind for a good while, she knew. 

_All_ of this would weigh on him. 

“When we lost Isaac,” she said, changing the subject without going too far off track, “we couldn’t find him on the cameras, or any sign that he had left the ship.” Her eyes narrowed. “Someone had tampered with the footage.” It wasn’t a question. They also both knew who she meant by _someone_. Ed nodded and sipped more coffee. “The same goes for Yaphit, obviously.” Her hand had slipped from his and ended up on his knee. She hadn’t noticed at first but now that she had she decided to leave it there. “They were both taken over to the _Discovery_ , and the logs wiped, obviously, and locked in that room where we found the captain, the one who started all this.” Ed nodded again. Kelly paused before she went on. “They couldn’t be possessed.” That wasn’t a question either. 

“No.” Ed turned his head to look at her. If he had a problem with her hand on his knee he didn’t say anything about it. “Isaac for obvious reasons, and Yaphit because of his biological makeup. Or that’s what we assume.” 

“But why not just kill him?” 

Ed’s brows raised. “Do _you_ know how to kill a Gelatinous lifeform?” 

Kelly actually smiled a little at that. “Good point.” Her smile faded. “It was easier just to lock him away with Isaac.” She almost made a remark along the lines of _poor Isaac_ but refrained. It didn’t feel like the right time to make jokes at anyone’s expense. 

“Right.” Ed offered the coffee back to her. She took it wordlessly. “And they knew Isaac would be able to figure all of it out before anyone else as well, which was another reason to take him out of the equation. And he hadn’t figured it out by the time they lured him over to the _Discovery_ under false pretences. They said they needed his help accessing the last of the logs. Yaphit too.” 

The creatures had been alarmingly clever, not to mention covert. For such unassuming looking things when without a host they had known exactly which angles to play them all from and how to get just what they wanted. Kelly had to take a sip of coffee to shift the bad taste that had threatened to creep up onto the back of her tongue. 

“The kids were never a target.” Ed was watching her and she suspected he knew exactly why she had sipped the coffee in that moment. He was pushing the conversation on to keep her from getting lost in the thoughts that had bubbled up in her mind. “That was Isaac’s theory anyway. They were too young, and—” 

“Too weak.” Kelly knew exactly where he had been going with that. 

Ed hesitated and then nodded. “Yeah.” 

“I’m glad we got a few of them off the ship for all of that anyway,” Kelly found herself saying, tipping the mug in her hands to watch the liquid shift this way and that. It was a poor attempt at nonchalance that she couldn’t have felt even if she hadn’t been directly involved in _all of_ _that_. She hadn’t found out exactly what Claire had done with the kids when she had returned to the ship but she could only hope she had asked them to stay in the shuttle until someone came to collect them. It was for the best, for Ty’s sake especially, tough kid though he was, if they hadn’t seen that aftermath. 

“Yeah,” Ed said quietly, barely above a whisper. “That’s something.” 

Kelly lifted her gaze, brow furrowed with a frown, and looked at him. He was staring through the coffee table again, lost somewhere in his mind once more, and though it took her a moment to put two and two together she thought she knew where he had gone. She had been there when it happened, thoroughly subdued in her own body and mind though she had been, as far from being in control as a person could be, but she had been there. She had seen it. And heard it. And _felt_ it. Kelly still felt it now but she knew that was just a drop in the ocean compared to what Ed had to be feeling by comparison. 

“That’s not your fault.” When he didn’t look her way or show any other signs of hearing her, Kelly set the mug down on the table and moved even closer to him, bringing her other hand up to turn his head _for_ him. She wanted to be able to look into his eyes when she said it again. “That was _not_ your fault. Do you hear me?” She kept her hand on his face, her other still on his knee, looking directly into his eyes and feeling her heart threatening to break at the pain she saw there. 

“She was trying to help me,” he said to her, his voice still very quiet but thick with emotion, the kind of emotion he would never show outside of a private space like this. Kelly knew she was one of the only people he would be so raw and so real with, one of the only people he felt he could show such things to without losing face. She wanted to tell him that his crew would never think any less of him for wavering or stumbling, she wanted to tell him that every single one of them respected him for the man that he was, every part of him, but in that moment she wasn’t sure he would be able to hear it. 

“She was doing her job,” Kelly reminded him, nodding her head a little. 

“And they killed her for it.” 

“Yes. _They_ killed her. Those things.” She took her hand from his knee and brought it up to his face in a mirror to the first. “They didn’t need an excuse and you did _nothing_ to push them to that. They did it because they _wanted_ to, not because you did anything wrong.” Kelly could hear the way her own voice was getting thicker and a little shakier as her emotions threatened to get the better of her. She took a moment to take a breath and swallow against the lump threatening to form in her throat. “It wasn’t your fault, Ed. _None_ of it.” She let those words sink in for a moment. “Do you hear me?” 

He heard her but it was one thing to hear her and another altogether to believe her and Kelly knew that was a much bigger ask. She felt him nod rather than saw it, the motion was so small, but she could see in his eyes and the crease in his brow, the downward turn at the corners of his mouth, that he might never believe what she had said. 

Kelly would just keep reminding him. No matter how many times she had to tell him, however many times he needed to hear it, she would be right there by his side. Right where she belonged. No matter what.


	22. United

Midnight had come and gone but sleep had continued to elude him. That was very likely the case for a lot of the crew, he was sure, and as he walked through the halls he could hear muffled sounds of activity behind closed doors to quarters and workplaces alike. What few individuals he passed gave him quiet acknowledgements, whether they were nods of the head or mutterings of his rank. Ed acknowledged them in return, opting primarily for the former. 

When he reached his destination he didn’t expect to find anyone else there. The mess hall was usually unoccupied at this time of night, at least during the week, but the spacious room boasted a single occupant who was sitting at one of the tables staring down at the surface. If she had noticed his arrival she was giving no sign. Ed remained where he was for a moment before he stepped into the room and headed for the bar, walking boldly around it to help himself to not just one drink but two. 

With a glass in each hand he headed over to the table. “Mind if I join you?” 

Talla blinked as she lifted her head, remaining silent for a moment as she looked sheepish. Ed wasn’t sure whether it was a result of his presence in general or the fact that she obviously hadn’t noticed she had _any_ company. “Captain. Of course.” She sat up a little straighter, appearing more awkward than he had ever seen her since she had first set foot aboard the _Orville_. 

Ed claimed the seat directly opposite her, but not before he set one of the glasses down in front of her. Talla looked down at it and then up at him, hesitating for a moment before she lifted the glass and took a sip. He saw the subtle signs of approval on her face even though she didn’t say a word. Ed had noticed her fondness for Xelayan rum. He took a sip of his bourbon and then set the glass down on the table. 

For a while he didn’t say anything, knitting his fingers together loosely on the table in front of him as he let his eyes roam the mess hall. With the low lighting and the scattered shadows it should have been unnerving after all that they had been through, and so recently, but Ed still found the place soothing somehow. Kelly had once called it beautiful. He was inclined to agree. 

“No one blames you, you know.” He turned his eyes to Talla only after he’d spoken the words, catching the way her whole body stilled just before she cleared her throat and made a conscious effort to regain full composure. When she didn’t immediately respond, he went on, “That thing would have jumped into whoever went into that room. It was rotten luck that it was you.” 

“That’s putting it lightly.” Talla took another sip of her rum, keeping her gaze turned down. 

It wasn’t like her to avoid eye contact. Since Ed had known her he had never seen the Xelayan in any way cowed or reserved. It wasn’t right. “Yeah,” he conceded, “it is.” That brought her gaze up, if only for a moment. No sooner had she dropped her gaze again than he was saying, “Talla, listen to me.” There was the slightest inclination of her head that told him she _was_ listening, even if she still wasn’t looking him in the eye. “It could have happened to anyone.” After a moment he pressed on, “And I’m not saying that to undermine what you went through, because it must have been hell. From what I’ve heard from others who went through it, that’s exactly what it was. And I can’t imagine how it must have felt. None of us who didn’t experience it can imagine it, so we can’t tell you how to feel, or how to deal with any of this.” 

Talla was turning her glass on the table, slowly and carefully so that she didn’t spill any of its contents. But she was still listening. 

So he kept going. “And I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. I’m sure it’s not.” Ed allowed himself the shallowest of laughs before saying, “Hell, I’d be shocked it if _was_.” And worried, most likely. “But that’s not a reflection on you, or anyone else. At least not a bad one. It means you’re _human_.” He paused, tilting his head. “Well, you know what I mean.” He had been trying to make her smile, at the very least, but it hadn’t had the desired effect. “Look.” She didn’t lift her gaze but he pressed on anyway. “What happened was awful, no one’s going to say otherwise, but it doesn’t say anything bad about _you_.” 

Talla did lift her eyes then, and she met his gaze directly for the first time since that moment on the bridge when she had come down to Gordon’s side while their Helmsman had been bleeding to death. “I could have killed you,” she said. 

“But you didn’t.” 

“I _might_ have.” 

“But you _didn’t_.” 

She pursed her lips and he saw the way the line of her jaw tightened as she gritted her teeth, likely in annoyance. Ed was well aware that he was being frustrating but at least he had gotten her to talk to him. And she was looking him in the eye now. 

“I wasn’t strong enough to hold that thing back or keep it from doing _any_ of what it did.” With a look of disgust and a shake of her head she gestured very pointedly at his left hand. “I broke your _hand_ ,” she said with the sort of fire that he had come to associate with her. It was actually reassuring in that moment, hearing her talk that way. “And I would have broken your arm, if Gordon hadn’t stopped me. God knows what else I would have done.” She lifted her glass and took a generous mouthful. 

Ed tipped his head, considering her words, and then he nodded. “All true.” After a beat he added, “Well, _almost_.” He took a swig before he went on, “Because it wasn’t _you_ , Talla.” Before she could argue he pressed the point, “It was your body and your voice, yes, but you weren’t holding the reins. You said so yourself: you weren’t strong enough to hold it back or keep it from doing _any_ of what it did.” 

Talla swallowed whatever she had been about to say and sat back in her seat a little, dropping her gaze. 

“Kelly told me that the thing inside of you was the leader,” he said to her, “and that it created all of the others. It was the original.” Claire would have used the scientific term but he didn’t need that here and now. Talla knew what he meant. She dipped her head a little in acknowledgement. “And it wanted the strongest person on this ship. That’s what it was after.” He ducked his head a little to catch her gaze and when he had it he straightened again, succeeding in encouraging her to do the same. “And that’s what it got. That’s not on you, Talla, no matter how you spin this.” 

It was on him, as far as he was concerned, but he wasn’t going to share that with her. It would only make her feel worse, he suspected, and that was exactly what he was trying to avoid. But just like it was Claire’s job to patch them all up when they were wounded, and just like it was Talla’s job to bust heads when they were under threat, it was Ed’s job to keep _all_ of them safe. He had failed too many of them in that regard during this mission. As he looked across the table at Talla it was impossible to doubt such a thing. If he had been more cautious about the _Discovery_ she never would have been put in the position to be infected in the first place. In his mind it was as simple as that. 

“It used my strength to hurt people. To _kill_ people.” She looked like she felt nauseated, and he couldn’t say he blamed her. In her position he would have felt the same way. 

“Exactly,” he said to her, and he heard the determination in his voice, the enthusiasm with which he spoke that single word. “It _used_ you. That’s exactly what it did.” 

Talla frowned, looking into her glass. It was getting low. “Ensign Holloway is dead because of me.” 

“No.” Ed spoke the word firmly and with every ounce of conviction he possessed. “Ensign Holloway is dead because she was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and because—” _I failed her_ , he thought but didn’t say, “—those things were _cruel_.” It was Ed’s turn to frown. “Kelly told me what it was like, what _they_ were like. They were clever and cunning but they were vicious. They were animals when you stripped away everything they got from their hosts. They were aggressive and predatory and they took pleasure out of using that stolen strength against others.” 

She was watching his face. “She told you that?” 

Ed nodded, remembering the hours he had spent in Kelly’s quarters with the two of them talking, going over every little detail together. He had ended up spending the night there when they had both realised that it was much too late for him to head back to his own quarters. All things considered Kelly’s couch was actually pretty comfortable but more than anything it was the knowledge that there was someone else close by, someone he trusted implicitly, that had made it so easy for him to sleep. “She told me that it took over completely when she was—” Ed couldn’t bring himself to say what he had been about to say, so he changed it, “—when we were fighting.” That was a little better. “It was all instinct and _rage_ , and it wasn’t even using her brain anymore. It wasn’t thinking at all. It just wanted to kill.” Ed remembered how a slight chill had trickled down his spine when Kelly had told him that. 

Talla had dropped her gaze briefly to her glass again, her brow furrowed. She shook her head but didn’t say a word. 

Kelly had also told him how arrogant the creatures were, how complacent in their abilities they had been. They had been so convinced of their superiority and the inevitability of their victory that the thing inside of her hadn’t even felt the need to warn the others about Claire’s environmental program and the threat it posed, because in its mind there hadn’t _been_ a threat. Not until Ed had made a break for it, at least, and that desperation to eliminate any possibility of being defeated had very likely played a large part in the parasite’s switch to full-blown predator, and would-be killer. 

“It wasn’t your fault, Talla.” Ed’s voice had softened and he hesitated before he reached out and laid his hand over hers. He saw the way she tensed, just for a moment, before it bled right out of her. When she lifted her eyes and met his he went on, saying, “I know it’s not easy to accept that, or believe it, but it’s the truth.” With his hand over hers he gave a slight squeeze. 

For a few moments she just looked back at him, obviously struggling with the words he had offered to her, and he saw the way she swallowed, more than likely against a tangle of emotions that had risen up in her throat. Instead of nodding or verbalising any kind of response she moved her hand but she didn’t withdraw it. She turned it over on the table instead, carefully so as not to dislodge his touch, and closed her hand around his. It was his left hand, the one that had been shattered in several places by the thing manipulating Talla’s considerable strength. It would have been easy to be unsettled by that knowledge but instead Ed gave her a small smile and the subtlest nod of his head, feeling the first promise of relief when she gave his hand a gentle squeeze in response. 

 

* * *

 

Kelly joined them first, taking the seat to Ed’s left and sitting so close to him that her arm brushed his any time she shifted her weight even the smallest amount. Bortus was next, taking the seat opposite Kelly, to Talla’s right. Claire and Isaac arrived one directly after the other, the Doctor taking the seat to Ed’s right with Isaac claiming the chair on her other side. John and Gordon were last to enter, with the former sitting across from the Kaylon. 

Gordon sat down next to Talla and gave her a smile. 

It was Isaac who made the trip to the bar and brought everyone a fresh glass of their preferred beverage, not saying a word as he did so. 

No one spoke and Ed knew why. It was because they didn’t need to say anything at all, because words weren’t necessary. Even after all that had happened none of them felt the need to speak so much as a single word. Instead they all sat there, every single one of them dressed for bed but far from feeling the call of sleep, each of them enjoying the companionable and trusting silence of their closest companions and crewmates. 

Crewmates wasn’t the right word for what they were. It fell short. 

Ed glanced to his side at Kelly. She smiled at him. Friends wasn’t enough either. 

He looked around the table, taking in each face in turn, and as he lifted his bourbon to take a drink he smiled to himself. 

Not just crewmates, and not just friends. They were more than that. So much more. 

They were _family_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say a huge and deeply heartfelt thanks to every single person who read and reviewed this fic as I was writing it because it wouldn't have been the incredibly rewarding and gratifying experience that it was without so much wonderful feedback. From start to finish I have loved writing this piece and it's because of the people reading it that that's the case, and at the risk of sounding beyond cheesy I feel so blessed to be a part of such an accepting and generously welcoming fandom. It had been over a decade since I'd last written a piece like this and you all made it such a wonderful experience that I never once regretted stepping back in, and I can't say that enough.
> 
> For anyone who's curious about such things I'm already planning out another multi-part fic in this fandom, and I have several ideas for one-shots that will (hopefully) start appearing in the near future. Hopefully you'll all enjoy reading those ones as much as I'll enjoy writing them! :D
> 
> And finally, for any trivia/pop culture geeks out there, the inspirations for this fic were as follows: _The Thing_ , _The X-Files_ (specifically the episode " _Ice_ " -- for anyone who wondered what the message on the wall from the _Discovery_ said, it was from this episode: _"We are not who we are"_ ), with little splashes of _The Faculty_ , and _2001: A Space Odyssey_. Those are the ones I can remember off the top of my head, with the first two (the second actually drawing a lot from the first) being the driving force.
> 
> Thank you all again for making this such a joy! I feel incredibly lucky, and beyond grateful, and I can't wait to dive back in with these incredible characters and this amazing world :D


End file.
